Come What May or 100 Days
by SeraphimeRising
Summary: When you lose your innocence, what comes next? RW/PP. Warning: EWE. Implied Rape & Physical Assault of Character. Language. Complete.
1. Broken

**Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter nor do make money.**

**Warning: This chapter is VERY dark.**

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Broken  
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If there was one thing thing Ron hated about being back at Hogwarts for his supposed 'seventh year' it was the rounds that the collective 'eighth years', which is what they called themselves, were to do in support of the younger prefects.

When he had decided to return to Hogwarts with many of his other classmates, Ron had been ecstatic about not having prefect duties but that hadn't lasted much past the welcoming feast. Instead as he and the other eighth years were being shown what would be their collective dorm, Headmistress McGonagall informed them that they would all share patrol duties to assist the younger students. Each eighth year would have to patrol in addition to the prefect patrols every two weeks.

And tonight was his lucky night as he was stuck patrolling the grounds with two fifth year Hufflepuffs.

Life couldn't get much better than this, he kept telling himself as he moved through the corridors with two Hufflepuffs who couldn't for the life of them shut the hell up. They insisted on carrying on about the upcoming Hufflepuff and Ravenclaw Quidditch match. He was about at his wits' end when they came to the final place they needed to check: the astronomy tower.

It had become an unwritten rule at some point during the school year, that the eighth years would be responsible for the astronomy tower as they were the oldest students and most able to deal with sixth and seventh year students who like to frequent it for 'alone time' with their significant others. Especially since time and time again, those incidents were the ones that the fifth and sixth years had the hardest trouble handling.

"Just wait here," Ron muttered to the Hufflepuffs as he started up the stairs, checking each room briefly before moving on. He enjoyed the peace and quiet he was finally getting by being away from the chatty fifth years.

He was about to head up the stairs when a movement caught his attention out of the corner of his eye. Stopping where he was, he turned his head to look but didn't see anything. Waiting patiently, he kept his eyes trained on the room, just below the roof, hoping whoever was hiding there would slip up and reveal themselves. Normally, he wouldn't have waited, but he just found himself hoping it would be a Slytherin that he caught; he was itching to remove some points and straddle the students with detention out of irritation for having to do these stupid rounds with fifth year Hufflepuffs to begin with.

After several minutes, Ron just shook his head with a sigh and was about to continue up the stairs when he saw movement again. This time, when he turned his head, he could see a pale hand with dark spots on it fall out of the darkness into the moonlight that was cascading through one on the small windows in the classroom.

Before he could register what he was looking at, a distant moan filled his ears as dread coursed through his body. Cold rushed through his body as it registered something was really wrong.

Rushing towards the hand, he cast a quick _Lumos_ before falling to his knees. There hidden in the darkness was the Slytherin Ice Princess: beaten, bruised, bloody and broken.

Ron fought back the urge to vomit, as her body lay bruised and battered in front of him; her face not much better. Her school uniform ripped to shreds and blood smeared on her exposed skin. He could see cuts up and down her thighs, stomach and arms. His hands and eyes went to her face looking for any signs that she was still alive. The gurgle of blood coming from her lips sent chills down his spine as he realized just how bad of shape she was in. He just hoped he found her in time.

Tearing off his cloak, he wrapped it around her battered body to shield it as he took her to the hospital wing. Ron lifted her up and rose to his feet in one motion. He noticed how limp she was in his arms which sent another wave of nausea through is body. Pinning her to his body as much as he could, he took off down the astronomy tower stairs. All the while he whispered for her to hold on; tell her he was taking her to get help.

He didn't stop to say anything to the Hufflepuffs when he re-entered the corridor outside of the astronomy tower. Their eyes grew wide as they took in Ron holding the battered body of another student wrapped in his cloak, but he didn't break a stride as he continued to the hospital area. He heard them take off saying something about getting the headmistress but he didn't pay them much mind. His sole concern was to get Pansy to Madame Pomfrey as soon as possible.

Ron kicked in the door to the hospital wing hard. Sending the door slamming into the wall, waking all who were spending the night there as evidenced by the sudden increase in mumbles and wide eyes as they watched him enter with someone in his arms who was deathly quiet.

"What is the meaning of this?" he heard Madame Pomfrey yell as he brought Pansy towards the back of the hospital wing and setting her down on an empty bed. Ron wanted to say something but he was breathing so hard from the run, he was barely able to catch his breath, let alone speak.

It didn't matter as he wouldn't have had a chance to respond regardless before Madame Pomfrey's gasp said it all as she rushed to Pansy.

"What happened?" she struggled to get out as she started to work. The light in the infirmary made it all the more evident how badly hurt Pansy was. Bruises and cuts were covering more of her body than he had even thought earlier.

"I don't know," he gasped taking a seat on the bed next to Pansy. "I was doing rounds and I found her in the astronomy tower."

"Grab me some of those screens," she ordered. "And set them around the bed."

"Yes ma'am," he responded, standing up to do just as she ordered. His eyes never leaving Pansy's still form as Madame Pomfrey started to fuss about her patient. Ron hated how silent she was; he'd give almost anything at the moment to hear Pansy snap at him about how poor his family was.

After he had done as Madame Pomfrey had requested, he took a seat back on the bed to wait. He didn't feel like he could leave just yet and not only because he knew the headmistress was on her way but because he wouldn't get any sleep until he knew Pansy was okay.

The rustling of dressing gowns filled his ears, as Headmistress McGonagall came quickly around the screens that Ron had set up.

Her hands flying over her mouth, she gasped at the sight before her, "What happened?"

"Mr. Weasley found her in the astronomy tower and brought her here," Madame Pomfrey responded starting to remove Ron's robe to inspect Pansy further. "Mr. Weasley, why don't you step out for a moment?"

It took a minute for it to register with Ron exactly what Madame Pomfrey asked. Shaking off the haze, he muttered, "Yes ma'am" before moving behind the screen.

"Did you see anything Mr. Weasley?" Of course McGonagall had to follow him.

"No ma'am," he responded. "I found her in the room beneath the roof. When I saw her, I didn't think to look and just got her down here as fast as I could."

"You did the right thing," McGonagall's voice soothing as she patted him on the shoulder. "Why don't you go ahead to bed and I'll let you know how she is in the morning?"

"Is she going to be okay?" he whispered, looking at McGonagall's worried brown eyes. He didn't need an answer because he could see it in her face. Pansy probably wasn't going to make it through the night. Hanging his head, he muttered, "I understand."

Turning around he slowly made his way towards the eighth year dorms. He hoped that everyone was in bed or studying or otherwise occupied by time he got there because he didn't want to talk about what had happened. He especially didn't want to talk about what he had seen. Not now and probably not ever.

He just wished someone had told him, he was covered in Pansy's blood as he entered the common area. Hermione's shriek rang through the common room as she ran towards him, causing everyone to turn their head. He watched as jaws from both males and females alike fell at the sight of his appearance.

"Ron, what happened?" she screeched starting to examine his arms, looking for cuts. "Are you okay? Did something attack..."

"I'm fine," he sighed, trying to push her away so he could get out of the common room with all those eyes staring at him. "I just want to shower and go to bed."

Grabbing his arm, she asked, "But you are covered in blood? Were you in a fight? But how could you be, you had rounds..."

"Hermione. It's not mine," he snapped, pulling his arm free. "Now please just let me go to bed."

"But..." she started before Harry cut her off whispering in her ear, "Let him go Hermione."

Sighing, Ron turned and entered the room that the Gryffindor boys shared. It was empty save Neville, who just looked at him with wide eyes but didn't say a word as Ron laid back on his bed and tried to get the image of Pansy broken out of his mind.

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_A/N: This is part of a free-writing exercise. You may see me experiment as a writer from time to time. There is no plot plan. I'm writing this based off 100 prompts. The prompts are the titles of each chapter._


	2. Motion

**Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter nor make any money.**

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**Motion  
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Ron had fallen into a routine that baffled everyone at Hogwarts who now knew what had happened the night he showed up in the eighth year dormitories covered in blood though he had never talked about it to anyone outside of the headmistress or Madame Pomfrey.

He was now one of the first students up, even beating Hermione on occasion. After showering and getting ready for the day, he would go to the hospital wing and sit with Pansy. She normally wasn't awake by then but it didn't matter to Ron. He just had to know that she was alive before continuing with his day. Especially after that first morning, when he wasn't sure what he would find when he opened those doors.

Then he would go have breakfast. After that he would go to his morning classes. Three days a week he had a free period before lunch and would go sit with Pansy again who would be awake but wouldn't say anything or even look at him. The other two days a week, his free period was after lunch so he would go visit her then. Where she would do the same thing; always awake but not acknowledging his presence.

Once his afternoon classes were complete, he would visit her again. She would often be asleep or simply feign sleep during these visits but he would just start on his homework while he sat with her.

He would then head off to dinner.

Finally, he would visit her one more time after his evening activities were done just before curfew. She normally would be asleep during these visits too but he didn't care.

As long as she was sleeping. As long as her chest moved up and down. She was alive.

And that's what mattered to Ron these days.


	3. Sarcasm

**Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter. Nor do I make any money.**

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**Sarcasm  
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"McGonagall sent me with your homework," Ron said to Pansy during one of his early afternoon visits. He could tell she was feigning sleep. He had noticed a distinct difference in her breathing two days ago but he wasn't going to tell her that.

When he didn't get a response, he sat it on the table by her and took a seat in the nearby chair without a word. He waited a few more moments, hoping for some sort of acknowledgment, before giving up with a sigh and grabbing his own homework to work on.

He was half-way through the potions essay he needed to finish by tomorrow, when he heard a weak voice say, "Why are you here?"

Looking up, he saw Pansy's eyes looking at him. The past few days he had been wondering what her eye colour was and for the first time, he could see they were a golden hazel that stood out from the purple residue of the bruises that were starting to fade. There was a hard, cold edge to them though that bothered Ron.

_No one's eyes should look like that_, he thought._ Not at our age._

"Just wanted to make sure you are okay," he responded before turning back to his work. Though those were the first words she had said to him, he figured they may also be the last for the day.

"As you can see I'm fine," she snapped, glaring at him. "Unless your eyes are second hand too."

"No you're not," Ron whispered quietly, putting away his books into his bag. Hoping this meant that she was finally willing to talk to him.

"Yes I am," she bit off again but her tone was off. Looking at her even closer, he could see just how much she was struggling with at the moment; trying to keep it together by putting him down with her best attempts of sarcasm and meanness though failing miserably in his opinion. "I'm perfectly fine. Fine as rain. So you can leave. The sideshow is closed for the day."

"You keep telling yourself that and when you are finished with lying to yourself, let me know."

He watched as she turned her head to look at the wall away from him. Sighing, he picked up this bag and slung it over his shoulder. Seeing the quill he had left on the pile of homework, he transfigured it into a white rose, figuring it was about time that someone sent her a flower after all she had been through.

"I'll be back before curfew," he told her before turning and walking out of the hospital wing.

Ron heard her start to cry but decided to just let her be.


	4. Attention

**Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter. Nor do I make any money.**

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**Attention  
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He was right.

She wasn't okay.

But who was going to help her?

Not her parents. They had sent her a letter explaining their new expectations of their only daughter. She was to come home during Christmas hols and prepare to pack up her things; her time at Hogwarts would be over. Pansy was going to be sent to live with her spinster aunt since now her marriage prospects were null. They didn't have to say it but she understood: she was no longer a Parkinson. She was disowned.

Evidently not her friends either. They hadn't stopped by to see her once and there had been no evidence that they have even been by while she was asleep. Pansy hadn't really expected Draco, Blaise or Theo to given what had happened but she had expected Daphne, Milicent, Tracy or Astoria. She figured they would understand. Yet, they hadn't stopped by once. The one time she really needed her friends, they had abandoned her.

The only one who had paid any attention to her was Ron Weasley. That poor, blood-traitorous Gryffindor who was too noble for his own bloody good. She tried to hand over his best friend to Voldemort only months ago and here he was – the only person to visit her.

Turning her head to see if he had gone, the single white rose laying on her homework caught her eyes. She struggled to fight back the tears as her body started to give into the reaction. Clutching tightly to her sheets, she wondered why he hadn't forsaken her.

Everyone else had.

Pansy finally gave into the losing battle as she started to sob violently as she watched him walk away.

He was just like everyone else.

She wasn't worth paying any attention to now that she had no purpose in life. She was nothing. She had no name, no money, no looks -- nothing.

She found herself wishing that Weasley had just let her die in that astronomy tower.


	5. Never

**Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter. Nor do I make any money.**

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**Never  
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"Mr. Weasley, could I see you for a moment?" McGonagall asked at the end of class.

Ron sighed and tried not to roll his eyes as he finished gathering up his books. With a brief of "I'll catch you later" to Harry and Hermione, he flung his bag over shoulder and made his way up to the front of the class.

"Yes ma'am?" he asked, while trying to figure out what he had done wrong. He'd been so busy between class, school work, Quidditch and visiting Pansy that he didn't have time to get into any trouble. Hell, he and Malfoy had managed to go the last two weeks without getting into a fisticuff. He should be getting a bloody award for that one.

"Would you mind taking Miss Parkinson's homework to her when you visit today?"

He should have known. Ron wasn't quite sure how he had been appointed as the person who brought Pansy her homework but he had. At first, he had wondered why the professors weren't sending it with her housemates and he even tried to ask the professors that but they all brushed him off.

"No ma'am," he replied, grabbing the parchments out of her hand.

He was about to turn and walk away when her next question stopped him, "How is she doing?"

Ron realized he had no idea. He was ashamed because he knew he hadn't even tried asking her.

"I don't know," he mumbled, looking down at his feet. "I can tell you she does look better and she isn't sleeping as much as she was in the beginning."

"That's odd," Professor McGonagall responded in a soft tone. The tone was so unfamiliar, that Ron picked up his head to look at her and was taken aback by the sadness he saw. "I was under the impression you have been visiting her every day, several times a day, Mr. Weasley."

"I do, but we don't talk. She mainly stares at the wall or pretends to be asleep while I sit there."

"I see," McGonagall said with a sad nod as she moved behind the desk as if she was going to leave the classroom too, either with him or just after.

"But maybe one of her friends knows," he added quickly. "I'm sure they can tell you."

"I assure you they can't."

"She won't talk to them either?"

"No Mr. Weasley," McGonagall said. "I don't know if you've noticed but you are the only one who has visited Miss Parkinson."

Ron was floored. His back had gone ramrod straight when he comprehended what she had just told him. Looking at her in disbelief, he whispered horrified, "She almost died and they _never_ have come to see her?"

He quickly turned on his heel and hurried out of the classroom before McGonagall could say another word. Ron found he couldn't get to the hospital wing fast enough. When he arrived, he was glad to see Pansy was awake. He watched her hopeful face disappear the moment she saw it was him. Out of frustration and anger, he shook his head as she turned her head away from him.

"Where you ever going to say anything about your friends not coming to see you?"

Ron didn't know what to expect her response to be but when she didn't say anything, he wasn't completely surprised.

His anger disappeared the moment he heard her sniff, knowing that she was fighting back her tears.

Sighing, he collapsed in the chair next to her bed. Rubbing his face with both hands, hating himself for making her cry. Finally, he took a deep breath and quietly said, "I'm sorry."

She turned to look at him, he could see the red rimmed hazel eyes with silent tears trickling down her face.

"I'm so sorry," he softly whispered again.

She just nodded her head, trying to show her forgiveness without saying a word and held out her hand to him. Scooting his chair closer to her bed, he took her hand in his and continued to sit with her in silence until it was time for him to leave for dinner.


	6. Accusation

**Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter. Nor do I make any money.**

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Accusation  
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Ron sat at the Gryffindor table idly picking his food and sipping his drink while waiting for Pansy to come through the doors to the Great Hall as she was being released from the hospital wing in time for dinner.

Of course he only knew that because he overheard Madame Pomfrey speaking to Pansy about rejoining her classmates as Pansy just sat in bed and refused to look at him anymore while he was there, let alone speak to him.

Hermione was just starting to pester him about playing with his food when he saw the doors open before she walked in. An uncomfortable hush fell over the Great Hall as he wasn't the only one to notice. He watched her carefully controlled expression fall off her face as quickly as her head bowed to stare at the ground. There was something so sad about watching her become so dejected so quickly as she made her way to the Slytherin table.

His eyes never left her slouching form as she made it down to the portion of the long table where all the Slytherins sat. Since the end of the war, many of the students in that house had chosen not return so while the other three tables were crowded at all meals, the Slytherins tended to congregate near the center of the table together.

Ron gripped his glass tighter as he saw the Ferret say something to her that caused her to back away from him quickly with a look of horror, shock and fear across her face. He watched her take a seat all by herself near the end of the table. Far from the rest of the Slytherins.

"That little wanker," he muttered, getting to his feet.

Grabbing his plate, utensils and glass, he left the Gryffindor table. He could hear the voices of his house mates asking him what he was doing but he didn't respond. Ron couldn't tear his eyes off Pansy who looked so dejected and about ready to break down and cry as she hung her head. She didn't deserve what ever that Ferret had said to her.

Putting his plate and glass down in front of Pansy, he took a seat at the Slytherin table not caring that the whole of Hogwarts was now staring at him with their jaws dropped. They could all go stuff themselves for all he cared.

"Are you okay?" he whispered to Pansy whose head was still hanging down.

Pansy's head shot up like a bullet. He could see that her eyes were red and she was struggling to hold back the tears.

"Why?" she whispered so softly that Ron barely heard her even in the stillness of the Great Hall.

He was about to answer when Malfoy sneered quietly, "Just what do you think you are doing sitting here? You that desperate for a pure-blood, you'd settle for her?"

In one swift move, Ron had grabbed the annoying little ferret by his tie and pulled him down so he was eye level with Ron. Ron didn't care who saw him, because when he was through with the ferret, he figured he should get a bloody award if he managed not to physically hurt him. Growling he said, "Now you listen here Ferret. She has been through enough. So unless there is a bit of humanity somewhere in that skinny little body of yours, I suggest you sod off before I throw you out that window behind you."

He watched as Malfoy started to say something but he cut him off, "No one is going to save you from me. Especially when they realize you were picking on her."

Ron shoved Malfoy back who just looked at him before looking around to see that Ron had been right. No one had moved from their seats, including the teachers who obviously saw just what happened. Straightening his appearance, Malfoy stalked away. Ron's glare followed Malfoy all the way back down to where the rest of the Slytherins sat.

"Thank you," a soft whisper broke him from his glare directed at Malfoy.

Turning his head, he saw a soft smile on Pansy's face for the first time.

He smiled back with a soft nod before saying, "No problem. Now eat."

Ron could have sworn he heard a soft inward laugh from her before he tucked into the rest of his meal, his eyes on Pansy making sure she ate while neither said a word.


	7. Companions

**Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter. Nor do I make any money.**

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Companions  
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Pansy shot up in her bed with a gasp. Her hand flew to her chest in a vain attempt to steady her rapidly beating heart. Her breathing so hard and labored she was surprised that she hadn't woken Daphne, Tracy or Millicent.

After several minutes, her breathing calmed down enough for her to lay back down in bed. Pulling her sheets back up around her, she rolled to her side and closed her eyes in hopes that she could go back to sleep.

But all she could see is yellow in the pale moon light. Those long, lean fingers reaching for her and grabbing her all over again. The pain that radiate through her body as it came in contact with the stone wall.

She had to get out of here.

She thought she would be able to sleep in her own bed tonight. At least she let Ron believe that when he asked her if she was going to be okay and without a word, she walked up to her bedroom.

And like so many other things since that night, she knew he was right and she was wrong again.

Crawling out of bed, she tiptoed past the other girls' beds hoping not to wake them. Though she thought that might be highly unlikely given that she hadn't woke them earlier but still, she didn't want to chance it.

She just didn't know what to say anymore especially not to them. Pansy found herself just wanting to remain silent. It was easier. It didn't hurt as much.

Opening the door, she carefully stepped out of the room onto the landing that ran along the wall in front of the four rooms where the female eighth years slept in rooms according to houses. The landing overlooked their shared common room. She breathed a sigh of relief when she saw that no one was still up in the common room.

Pansy continued down the stairs with the hopes that maybe curling up next to the fire, her mind would actually let her sleep. However, her feet had different ideas as they carried her to the Gryffindor boys' room. Her hand was on the handle, when she realized just where was.

Biting her lip, she stared at the closed door, trying to decide if this was a good thing or not. Turning her head around, she looked at the empty common room and sighed as she pressed the door handle carefully down.

Opening the door slowly, she saw five beds lined on both sides of the room. Ron had told her earlier which one was his and he would leave the curtains open, if she should need anything during the night. She didn't see a bed with curtains open at first which she figured was the fates cruel way of forcing her hand further.

Moving completely inside the room, she closed the door gently behind her and crept to the aisle between the two rows of beds. She finally could see Ron's bed at the end of the aisle on the right. He had left the curtains open, just as he said he would.

She was beginning to wonder why she ever doubted him anymore. He had always kept his word to her from the first moment she woke to find the Gryffindor sitting by her bed, scratching out an essay.

Taking a deep breath and holding it, she moved towards the bed. He was facing away from the wall and towards the bed next to his. He looked so peaceful sleeping at that moment, she knew she would hate herself if she woke him but she also knew that she wanted to sleep. And not dream of yellow coming towards her.

Carefully she crawled into bed, trying desperately not to wake him. She settled in a little ball in his bed but not touching him. Pansy had finally allowed herself to breathe again at the same time she felt an arm wrap around her waist, pulling her back.

Her eyes snapped open as she realized he was touching her and moved to get out of the bed as quickly as possible. He couldn't touch her. She was too dirty, too worthless. She was nothing. Why would he touch her?

"Shhhh," she heard him whisper as he held onto her, fighting her attempt to get out of his reach. "I'm not going to hurt you."

"I...," she whispered back, trying to hold back the tears that wanted to fall as she stopped fighting against him. Finally letting him hold her against his warm body, she struggled as she spoke, "I just...I just...Ron..."

He interrupted her stops and starts with a gentle whisper against her ear, "Shhhh. It's going to be okay. Let's just get some sleep. We can talk in the morning."

Pansy just nodded her head and let him pull her down, his arm never leaving her waist. Curling up next to his much larger body, her tears finally dried up when she realized that she was safe. She was actually safe, a snake amongst all these lions. Sighing, she closed her eyes and drifted off to a dreamless sleep.

Harry didn't want to wake up but he knew he had to. It wouldn't be a good thing for either him or Ginny to be caught together in his dorm. Her because she was the Head Girl and was supposed to be a role-model to other students. Him, well her very large, older brother was sleeping in the next bed. Though Ron was his best mate and swore that he was okay with them dating again, he still wasn't entirely sure Ron wouldn't beat the tar out of him for corrupting his 'innocent' little sister.

Peeking his head out between the drapes to check to see that Ron was not only in bed but still dead to the world, his jaw fell open at the sight before him.

There in the early morning light was Ron fast asleep facing Harry's bed but tucked up into him lay Pansy Parkinson on her back. Her legs bent over his, her head cradled into his neck and arm, her hand in a death grip on the arm that held her close to Ron and the evidence of dry tears staining her once innocent face.

"Harry, what is..." Ginny's furious whisper stopped the moment her eyes saw what Harry was starring at.

Harry and Ginny both stared at the angry red scars, realizing that Pansy had used a glamour the previous evening. Staring at the hideous truth of what had happened that night two weeks ago.

The thick, long scars that ran up the length of her leg they could see. The small ones seemed to criss cross her arms and hands. The large one that screamed 'look at me' that jagged across her cheek. Ginny's hand flew to her mouth when her eyes finally saw the one that started beneath her ear and disappeared into the shadows of Pansy's chin tucked securely against her brother.

"Harry," Ginny whispered her voice cracking. She had seen a lot of things in the past year but to see the evidence of what exactly happened to the Slytherin Ice Princess was more than even her hardened heart could take.

"I didn't know either," Harry muttered.

He now understood just what Ron had seen that night when he came back with his clothes soaked in blood and a distant look in his eyes. Guilt flooded Harry as he should have asked before then about the dried blood that had lingered on Ron's hands and arms while blood also streaked his face. He just thought that Ron would come to talk to him. Every day he kept Hermione away, he figured his best mate would talk to him about what had happened. But he never had. Harry felt Ginny's arms wrap around his neck as her hot tears came in contact with his neck.

He wrapped his arm around her holding her and whispered, "He's never said a word."


	8. Blessing

**Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter. Nor do I make any money**

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Blessing  
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Headmistress McGonagall was beginning to wonder where the young man she had taught for the past seven years but known the past eight had disappeared to. Since that awful night in the infirmary two weeks ago, she had watched a change in Mr. Weasley; greater than the one everyone had witnessed last year when he had disappeared as a boy and reappeared as a man.

She had been informed by Madame Pomfrey earlier that day that she would be releasing Miss Parkinson around dinnertime making the Headmistress and other staff members nervous. It had simply been a miracle that Miss Parkinson had survived that night and without them being able to determine who had attacked her, they were rightfully frightened that whoever had done it would do it again.

And though she had been disappointed by the Slytherins' abandonment of her while she laid in the hospital wing, she did maintain some hope, that they would welcome her back into her arms. Hoping that maybe just visiting the infirmary is what really kept them away.

Unfortunately, while waiting with bated breath and the Great Hall falling into silence, she and the rest of the staff would find themselves sorely disappointed in the Slytherin house. They all watched as Pansy approached the rest of her house. Horrified, they saw what little bravery the poor girl had left disappear with whatever was said to her before she ended up taking a seat at the back of the table even more vulnerable now than ever. Professor Slughorn started muttering that his entire house would be serving detention with him for the next two weeks; he would serve them notice after dinner.

The sound of mumblings from the direction of the Gryffindor table caused her to turn her head. She watched as Mr. Weasley, with his plate and glass in hand, strolling over to the end of the Slytherin table before taking a seat in front of a rightfully dejected Miss Parkinson.

She felt Professor Slughorn begin to move out of his seat when Mr. Malfoy approached the two at the end of the table. Headmistress McGonagall grabbed at Professor Slughorn's arm to stop him as the stillness grew heavy as they watched Mr. Weasley pull Mr. Malfoy down by the tie. They didn't move when Mr. Malfoy turned his head to look at them or even stand up when Mr. Weasley shoved him back. Instead they chose to show their disappointment in Mr. Malfoy with glares as he sulked back to his seat.

The sound of the Great Hall started to increase as the staff kept their eyes on the end of the Slytherin table where it appeared that the two were eating without a word. All making mental notes to check on the two in the morning at breakfast before classes began. While Slughorn muttered to the Headmistress about having to suffer through detention with the Malfoy brat for the next month.

However, when breakfast arrived no one was more shocked than the Headmistress as she watched as Mr. Weasley entered behind Mr. Potter, Miss Granger, and Miss Weasley with Miss Parkinson close to his side with her head down. Her jaw fell slack when she realized that Miss Parkinson was taking a seat across for the other three by Mr. Weasley at the Gryffindor table. She didn't know what to think when she saw him fix Miss Parkinson a plate and whisper something into her ear causing her to look at him with a soft expression before starting to eat.

"Are you seeing what I'm seeing?" Professor Slughorn whispered in her direction, his eyes glued to the same table as the Headmistress.

"Unbelievable but I am," she responded. She couldn't tear her eyes away as she watched Mr. Weasley interact with Mr. Potter, Miss Granger, and Miss Weasley as he always had while Miss Parkinson sat beside him quietly, never looking up or engaging in the others' conversation. Every so often, he would turn to her and whisper something that always caused her to eat a little more.

Softly, Miss McGonagall whispered out loud but more for herself, "What an unexpected blessing."

"I'm off to class. Headmistress, if you please, let Miss Parkinson know that I don't mind if she would like to attend Potions with Mr. Weasley. She can sit in the back and work on her homework," Professor Slughorn said, standing up. "That is if you think it would help make the day easier for her."

The Headmistress shook her head out of her revelry at the implication that Professor Slughorn had said. Thinking it may be the best idea any of them had come up with in how to handle their concern regarding Miss Parkinson's well-being after such a brutal attack.

"Nor do I," the new DADA professor, Bill Weasley, responded also taking his leave. But not before leaning over and whispering, "Don't look so surprised by little Ronnie, McGonagall. We all knew he had it in him. Charlie and I always kind of thought he was the gift we got in return for being saddled with the twins and Ginny. It has always been a question of him realizing it for himself."


	9. Metal

**Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter. Nor do I make any money.**

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**Metal  
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"Um, Ron..."

"What Harry? I'm kind of busy here," Ron whispered harshly back at his best mate. He was hard at work on the tedious portion of the potion, Slughorn had assigned as part of the class practical today. Normally, he wouldn't care but Potions was going really well for him today and he wanted to see this potion through all the way. He desperately needed something to go right for him at the moment so his mind wouldn't focus on Pansy.

"It's Pansy."

Ron's head popped up quickly. He eyes went from his best mate to the spot where Pansy was sitting. Slughorn had agreed to let her sit in the back of the classroom and work on her homework instead of having to be by herself while he was in class. Ever since the nightmare last night, he could tell she had been reluctant to leave his side but wouldn't say anything about wanting to stay near him. He really appreciated that the teachers were okay if she joined him in the classes they didn't already share. It relieved some of his own stress that had been increasing since she had been released from the hospital wing yesterday.

His stomach dropped, the moment he saw her.

She was still sitting at the desk but the colour in her face was completely gone as she stared at into the unknown. Her hands were gripping the desk so hard, that even from a distance he could see the white in her knuckles as if those hands where the only thing keeping her in her chair. The fear in her face undid him completely.

"I got it," Ron heard Harry whisper stepping closer to him. "Go take care of her."

Ron moved as fast as possible to where she was now rocking, muttering 'knife' to herself with her eyes tightly closed. His movements had caused everyone's attention to stop being on their potion projects but on Pansy.

"Pansy," he whispered, squatting down beside her. He moved to touch her and she lashed out at him. She jumped back from the table quickly, causing her to send the stool she had been sitting on flying as she moved away from him – like a cornered and wounded animal.

His heart tore apart as he watched her eyes wide with terror melt into anguish as they glazed over with her tears once she recognized just who had touched her.

"I'm not going to hurt you," he whispered as her breathing picked up while the tears started to fall. Staying where he was, as she started to sob uncontrollably, he softly pleaded, "Please let me help you."

Horrified, he watched her fall to the ground suddenly, her legs unable to hold her sobbing body no longer. Slowly, he moved closer to her. Relief flooded him as she didn't make any attempt to retreat any further.

Kneeling down in front of her, he whispered, "Pansy, please let me help you."

Ron let out the breath, he hadn't realized he was holding, as she lifted her head to look at him. The terror in her eyes started to ebb away in favor of an empty look that shook Ron to his core. He had seen so much in his eighteen years but nothing had undone him more than in that moment to see her, see her soul, disappear right in front of his eyes.

"Potions knife," she told him, her voice almost gone but what was left, reeked of death. "He used his potions knife."

"Pansy," he whispered. "Let me help you. Let me get you out of here."

Biting her lip, he watched as what was left of her flee her eyes as she nodded. Ron had never been so thankful as she reached her arms out to him. He closed his eyes and muttered a silent prayer to any god that was listening as she wrapped her arms around his neck. Reaching under her legs, he brought her body close to him and stood.

Turning around as he headed to the door, Ron saw his classmates for the first time. The tears that silently ran down the girls cheeks. The stoicism etched in the other boys faces as they fought what they were really feeling..

Professor Slughorn nodded his head, his face sad and troubled. Ron took it as silent permission to leave the classroom with Pansy. Tightening his grip on her, he left the classroom and proceeded to their dorm. Hoping it could provide the shaking girl in his arms the comfort she desperately needed because he wasn't sure that he could.

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_A/N: Starting with this posting, I will always update this 'story' on T & Th. _


	10. Eyes

**Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter. Nor do I make any money.**

_A/N – This is what happens when I want to play. Somehow I started channeling Faulkner – so you should forgive me; everyone goes through this stage. At least that's what I like to believe. Especially when one has been reading Joyce and Neruda while drinking bourbon. – Seraph 0:)_

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**Eyes**

_Harry's eyes saw the fear in Ron as he ran to Pansy._

It reminded him of the look in Ron's eyes as he tried to desperately get to Hermione that awful evening in the Malfoy Manor: the loss of control radiating in the way he managed to lengthen his limbs to cover the distance faster; the panic revealed in paleness in his already fair complexion; the lips that moved without a sound in his desperation; the panicked eyes that screamed silently. Harry watched as his mate once again put himself aside: his needs, his desires – everything that made him Ron and transformed into the black knight of Hogwarts. Harry knew that Ron didn't mind in those times he was needed. Harry just wished that Ron didn't have to always be the knight in shining armour.

_Hermione's eyes glazed over in jealousy._

Ron was her boyfriend but he was going to her rescue. Though Hermione knew Pansy needed it, it didn't make the jealousy go away. She had waited so long for Ron to see her not as his best mate but as a women who was worthy of his love. For him to love her as much as she loved him. Hermione thought she finally had what she wanted, but she wasn't in trouble now. Pansy was, so Hermione's knight became Pansy's. Her tears weren't for Pansy. They were for herself; because she was losing her knight and there wasn't anything she could do about it. Ron wasn't going anywhere. He was already gone.

_Draco's eyes widened as he watched the Pansy he knew disappear._

The Pansy he knew was a bitch. He should know, he created her. He had cruelly broken her heart after the Yule Ball in fourth year; destroying the sweet, playful girl that she had once been. When her tears had finally dried all that was left of the girl he grew up with was the bitch he had come to know and actually love. The bitch who had become his best friend; the one that had stood by him during the hell he went through last year. Now, he felt so small, as he watched his best friend fall away to the innocent, sweet girl who had loved him and then horribly to an empty shell. There in front of his eyes, he had watched her disappear. Draco knew he should be the one racing to her but yet once again he hadn't done what was right – he had done what he was told.

_Professor Slughorn's eyes studied his students as their eyes focused on Ron and Pansy._

He saw sadness in Harry's eyes, loss in Hermone's, and pain in Draco's. The sadness in Harry's he had expected. The young boy had always carried so much on his shoulders in a war that he shouldn't have had to fight as a child. The loss in Hermione's took him by surprise. She was always so on top of things and put together; he wondered what was behind that look. The pain in Draco's, though it surprised him; he found it reassuring. He had been so disappointed in his house and in Draco but now, watching him experience just what Pansy had gone through, and had survived, he found hope: hope that Draco would finally do the right thing. Now that he was learning what it was the hard way.

_Ginny's eyes looked in disbelief as she watched her brother run up the stairs with a shaking Pansy wrapped tightly in his arms._

Her feet took off running in the other direction, towards the Headmistress' classroom. Ginny hated to think of what her brother was going through right now. The hours she spent talking to Harry this past summer had told her of what Ron had gone through at Malfoy Manor and then after at Shell Cottage. How he had fought so hard to get to Hermione in the Manor and how he didn't sleep for days once they were in the safety of Shell Cottage. All because he refused to sleep until he knew Hermione was okay. She and Harry had always teasingly called him the black knight of Hogwarts and as she ran into the third year Transfiguation class, she realized that maybe they were right. That's where Ron fit in amongst the sea of brothers: Bill was the rebel; Charlie, the daredevil; Percy, the brains; George, the joker; and Ron, the knight – possibly the best of them all because he always thought of himself last in times people needed him the most.

_Headmistress McGonagall's eyes reddened and watered at the sadness they beheld as she stood amongst the other eighth years._

For in the glow of the fireplace, lay Mr. Weasley and Miss Parkinson both asleep on the couch, fiercely intertwined. Her fingers in a death grip on his shirt. His arms tightly wrapped around her. Her face buried into his neck. His body sheltering hers. And though the tears had stopped, the residue of their presence glistened on their reddened faces.


	11. Shadows

**Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter. Nor do I make any money.**

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**Shadows**

_A/N: Still reading Neruda 0:) _

She sat in the shadow of the common room and just watched them sleep, long after the rest of her dorm mates had gone to bed.

The fire had dimmed in the fireplace in front of them but there was still enough to cascade light on the two sleeping students. Their two bodies intertwined.

They had been that way since everyone had returned from their last class of the day. Though their troubled thoughts were physically manifested in the dried tears upon their faces, the occasional sniffles that were sounded, and the way they physically clung to the other – no one thought to wake them up. They had been through so much in the past two weeks, that no one could bring themselves to steal them from the one thing that hadn't escaped them, yet.

Several students had discarded their homework just to watch them sleep that evening: some out of awe, some out of jealously, some out of pain, some out of sadness. In those stolen moments, there was something sadly peaceful in watching the two of them sleep.

And she hated that.

She hated that she found the process of watching them curled up in and around each other to be cathartic when she was so jealous. She hated watching those two people, two souls, cling to the other in need and desperation. For them to cling to a perfect stranger that had meant so little to the other for so long, tore at her already bleeding heart.

It hurt to watch them from her hiding spot.

Every so often, she watched as his fingers shifted to explore, before pulling her tight against his body. His head would always shift when he did, as if to make sure she was properly tucked up underneath him. His body shielded hers; protecting it from an unseen and unforgotten foe. Once his unconscious mind was sure she was safe, tucked within his arms, he would kiss her forehead.

She watched as her body would react from his movements. Arching first before settling into shelter his body was providing her. In those moments, she watched as her hand would relax and softly caress him unknowingly, before gripping his shirt tightly again as she buried her face into his neck. And once his lips had placed a kiss on her forehead, she would softly moan in appreciation before her body would relax in his arms.

It was so intimate to watch them act, react, and respond to the other – always naturally – always innately. As if their bodies and minds were somehow connected. That even in their deepest sleep, their bodies responded knowingly to the slightest direction from the other. That their minds, though in suspended reality, understood what wasn't being spoken.

They slept as if they had spent a lifetime with the other: nights of loving moments; months of holding hands; afternoons of innocent embraces; weeks of stolen kisses; mornings of lingering desires; days of glances; evenings of warming touches; and moments inspiring jealously in others.

Every touch and caress, every action and reaction, she watched jealously. Her eyes never left the image of what she had dreamed to be hers one day.

That she would be the young woman wrapped in his arms. That it would be her body, he would instinctively know. That it would be his love that shielded her from the monsters that go bump in the night.

All her plans and all her dreams were crumbling away right in front of her.

Everyone had always said that he was her better half.

He was the one that wasn't scared of her temper. He wasn't intimidated by her intelligence. He was strong enough to challenge her. He fought with her with a passion that couldn't be denied.

And she had thought herself to be his better half.

The one who always believed in him. The one who wanted him to be the best he could be. The one who challenged and pushed him. The one who simply loved him for who he was.

Sitting in the shadows of the common room, watching them sleep, she came to the painful realization that simply her loving him would never be enough.

That her love would be the one thing he would never need. Or worse, ever want.


	12. History

**Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter. Nor do I make money.**

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History  
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He watched her watch them.

She had been doing it all evening – from the moment, they found Weasel and Pansy curled up together on the couch fast asleep. It hadn't been long before she had crawled up into the chair that kept her in the shadows with a large book on her lap. Anyone who knew Granger would have thought her to be studying the large tomb but only he evidently had noticed that she never turned a page.

He watched as others had stopped their activities to do the same as she – watching the sleeping couple. The others though only watched Pansy and Weasel for minutes here and minutes there but not like her, she had watched them for hours.

She didn't even go to dinner with the rest of them. He had watched Potter try to get her to go to dinner and smirked when he heard her tell him she wasn't hungry and she needed to get her book read for Arithmancy. Hell, he wanted to laugh and point out that the book on her lap couldn't help her with Arithmancy – it was a book on veelas. However, she was so fascinating to watch, that he kept his mouth shut as Potter left with the youngest Weasley to go to dinner.

The entire time the common room was empty due to dinner, she had stayed in the over-sized wingback chair, just in the shadows and watched them; as he watched her.

He was fascinated by the extremes in her emotions that she was displaying: jealous one minute of the couple but then, almost out of regret and remorse, she would show those emotions that one would expect in this situation.

Yet most of all, he wondered at what was going through the mind of the know-it-all. The things that the emotions written on her face couldn't explain. The things that a lifetime of histories with her would only just scratch the surface on.

He, himself, had never understood the attractiveness of the weasel but Granger sure saw something in him. However, in the seconds that he would allow his eyes to leave his target to glance upon the girl he had forsaken; he could see it. The weasel could give her a future; something he could never do.

Most importantly, the weasel was everything that he wasn't.

He would never have shared his tears with her. He would never hold her like the weasel did – like she was the most precious thing in the world. He would never have gone to her in her moment of need. He would never have been gentle or warm. He would never have offered comfort with chaste kisses. He would never be there for her.

Especially since he been told not to. And Malfoys always did what their parents told them to do.

He had forsaken her because his father told him to do so. She now had no value in their world because she was no longer a virgin. She was worthless to her family and their society because she had been raped. She had no business being a friend of the Malfoys since she brought nothing to the table.

He wanted his eyes to linger and watch his best friend manage to find some peace in his enemy's arms but he wouldn't allow it. For it would remind him just how awful a person he really was. So he settled on watching Granger.

Watching her fits of jealousy mixed with moments of increasing sadness, he reveled in her discomfort and misery because it mirrored his own bubbling to the surface.

Taking a deep breath, Draco realized what he needed to do as he watched another bout of jealousy overcome Granger's face. He couldn't save nor could he help Pansy. He may not be able to be her best friend publicly but he knew how he could protect her while she healed from everything she had suffered. He knew what he had to do to give her time to find a life outside the one they grew up in and if the weasel – no, Weasley – was what she needed to survive then he would make sure nothing and no one would take that away from her.

He had already done enough damage to her for one lifetime, it was about time he did something right by her.

Standing up, he moved to the Gryffindor boys' room where he knew Potter to be. Entering it, he saw Potter lying on his bed with the littlest Weasley, both studying. He was momentarily thankful that none of the other Gryffindors were in the same room. If they had been, he knew he couldn't say what he needed to to Potter. Him and Potter's history was already more than he would ever want to overcome.

Closing the door behind him, he watched as Potter sat up with his Weasley. They looked at him hard before Potter said, "What do you want Malfoy?"

"We need to talk about Granger."

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_A/N: Special thanks to Yenny2206 who pointed out that I somehow managed not to put up 'History' which comes before 'Talent'._


	13. Talent

**Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter. Nor do I make any money.**

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**Talent**

When Ron woke he didn't know how long they had been asleep. The fire was almost out so it had to be late.

Propping up on his elbow, he saw that Hermione was the only person still in the common room. She evidently fell asleep again doing homework. At least that's what Ron assumed given the large, open book on her lap and in seven years of being her friend.

Looking at Hermione now, he sadly realized that this was the first time he had looked at her since that awful night in the astronomy tower. She had regretfully become a distant priority in his life as Pansy had suddenly become the most important. He couldn't explain the change. It just had happened.

And he felt powerless to fight his instincts.

He felt guilty for the way he had been treating Hermione but he just couldn't stop himself. In the past two weeks, as he pushed everyone away from him while he silently dealt with what he had seen, he couldn't honestly say he missed her: hadn't missed her nagging; the screeching tone her voice would take when she was upset; the yelling; or the fighting. He really hadn't missed her at all.

And boy did that make him feel like one talented arsehole.

He couldn't remember a time when he didn't have a crush on her. He could remember just how beautiful she was as she entered the Yule Ball and how jealous he felt – though he hadn't known what that feeling was at that time.

He couldn't put a finger on when his feelings had changed from a crush to something more. He could remember how right it felt with her in his arms at Dumbledore's funeral.

He couldn't remember his life without her in it. He could remember how he felt looking at her broken body in the parlour of Malfoy Manor and thought this may be it. She had been so limp in his arms when he Apparated to Shell Cottage; he watched her for days to come to make sure she was alive.

In those dark days, he had come to the conclusion that he loved her.

That he always had. That he always would.

Until today. Until this moment.

Right here, right now – Ron could safely say he didn't love her.

Not anymore.

He just didn't know how to tell her that. Not after everything they had been through together.

Especially since he didn't know what had changed; to change how he felt about the girl he was sure at one point he would marry.

Sighing, he looked down to the small body pressed against his that was beginning to stir; the small body that had changed his life forever.

He just wasn't sure if he actually liked the change quite yet.

He carefully and gently pulled his body up and away from her. Crawling over her, he found that he couldn't tear his eyes away from her delicate features that looked so peaceful. He wanted to be in a better position to pick her up and take her to bed, because anything was better than the sofa. His feet had just touched the floor when he saw her eyes flutter open abruptly, fear running through them as she reached out to grab him.

Settling himself on the ground with her hands clutching at his shirt, he whispered as he stroke her hair in an attempt to calm her, "It's okay. I'm not going anywhere."

"But..." she whispered, reluctant to agree with him.

"I didn't want to wake you," he gently told her, still stroking her hair, pulling it away from her face. "But I figure the bed would be much more comfortable. You just woke up before I could move you."

"I can..." she started to say but stopped for some unknown reason.

Ron sadly wondered how long it would take before she would actually start speaking in complete sentences so he didn't have to assume what she wanted. Smiling sadly, he whispered, "Yes you can. Do you want to change out of your uniform?"

This time she didn't say anything but just nodded.

"Go on then," he said with a gentle smile. "I'll wait here for you."

He helped her to her feet; the small, genuine smile she gave him warmed his heart. Ron's eyes didn't leave her until she had entered her room up the stairs.

Sighing, he turned back around and figured he would get Hermione to go to bed too while he waited. He just didn't expect her big brown eyes to be staring at him, full of tears; eyes that were looking at him with pain and heartbreak instead of the accusations he knew he deserved.

"Hermione," he softly said moving towards her.

"Why?" her voice cracking as he knelt in front of her.

"I don't know Hermione," he whispered, pushing her hair back. "I know I'm not being fair to you and you deserve better than this, you deserve better than me. I'm not half the man you deserve."

"Ron, please tell me one thing," she whispered painfully. "What is going to happen to you when she no longer needs you and I no longer want you?"


	14. Heaven

**Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter. Nor do I make any money.**

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**Heaven**

Pansy didn't have a lot of faith to begin with. She didn't even believe in a heaven or a hell – just that a person died and went away. Raised as she was in a world of half-lies mingled with masks of clay and iron; one never learns how to trust, let alone have any faith in another person or anything for that matter.

There was one rule that you lived by in the pure-blood society – you only have yourself. Everything else is inconsequential.

She had learned that lesson the hard way chasing Draco Malfoy up and down the hallowed halls of Hogwarts. Pansy had tried so hard to be the girl he would want; to be what her parents wanted her to be – the next Lady Malfoy. Unfortunately, Draco had decided she wasn't good enough for him. She hadn't been pretty enough or cute enough, or smart enough or really anything. There were times that his bitter and hateful words rung in the background as she found herself looking at someone new. However, she found that they protected her. His harsh words kept her grounded in the reality of the world she grew up in – a world where allegiances were made, not relationships. Though there had been young men who would flirt with her or plead for her favors, she did nothing without her parents' permission and that had left her more innocent in the ways of the world under her bitchy facade.

A lot of good it had done her to be the perfect, dutiful daughter.

So right now in the dawning light of the new day, she felt a bit lost. She couldn't explain the comfort she was feeling as she lay in his bed, in his arms. She couldn't explain the peace that surrounded her; a feeling that had escaped her for so long that it had taken her several days in the infirmary to figure out what she was feeling every time she knew he was near.

Turning her head slightly, she took in the face of her angel as he slept. Her eyes followed the strong jaw that was roughened by his morning scuff. The strong Roman nose that fit his face. The scar on his cheek that she itched to touch. To see if it felt the same as her own scars, the ones that only he knew about.

She studied his shaggy hair that was now falling across his face in his sleep. The colour of it, the same as the rising sun; shades of red and gold weaving through every strand. Pansy, until this moment, had never realized just how beautiful it was. How no one could quite create the same colour – though many girls at Hogwarts had tried over the years to get the Weasley red. They just couldn't capture the same natural brilliance of the glowing colour.

Tentatively, she reached out and brushed some loose strands back from his face. Pansy anticipated him to wake but he didn't stir. She grew braver as she let her fingers caress his face. First exploring the scar on his cheek. She marveled at how it wasn't rough and rigid like hers but smooth and concave; making her wonder if her scars with time would feel the same way.

Her fingers trailed along his jaw next. The roughness of his day's growth mixed with the gentleness of her touch almost tickling her. She wondered how it would feel then to have it softly move along places of her body more sensitive then her finger tips.

Boldly, she let her finger move to his lips. She softly moved them along the outside of their line before moving them along the line and then exploring the feel of his lower lip. How it felt soft and surprisingly smooth, so unlike the few men's lips she had felt in her short life time.

Smiling to herself, she gently flattened her palm and caressed his entire face as she wondered how she had never seen him before. She swore to herself that she would always make a point of seeing him every chance she was given.

In a parting gesture, she briefly kissed the tips of her fingers before pressing her fingers to his own lips. Closing her eyes, she pulled her hand away and turned on her side, facing away from him, before pressing her body up against his in attempt to get a few more minutes of sleep before breakfast.

She never saw Ron's eyes finally open, trying to figure out just what the bloody hell had just happened.


	15. Green

**Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter. Nor do I make any money.**

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Green**

The afternoon sun felt warm against Ron's face as he lay stretched out on the grounds of Hogwarts. The fall was slowly turning into winter; the combination of the cool breeze with the hot rays felt good.

He should have been in class right now but with everything that had happened yesterday, Professor McGonagall allowed him and Pansy to skip their classes for the day. He and Pansy managed to make it to their morning classes. However, by lunch time all the whispering in became too much for Pansy and so instead of heading to Charms, they went outside to sit by the lake for some peace and quiet.

Looking over, he could see Pansy laying on her stomach appearing to be sketching something. Her face showing every ounce of her fierce concentration as she kept biting her lip and scrunching her face. Ron found himself more than curious to see what she was sketching but decided not to say anything, instead choosing to study her.

There were so many things different in her appearance outside of the scars that only they and the staff knew about. And though none of the changes surprised him, he found himself laying there missing the confident girl he had always thought to be a bitch. It was just odd to see her in pants now as well as her wearing the full sweater instead of the sweater vest most girls preferred. Then there was her hair. The short bob had disappeared over night. Instead her straight, black hair hung past her shoulders. She pinned some of it back but for the most part it had become yet another curtain for her to hide behind.

Except when she was with him. Like now.

She had pulled up her hair and had it secured somehow with two quills. Ron could see the soft line of jaw and the long eloquent neck that screamed her high birth. In her ears, she wore plain studs instead of flashy and expensive earrings.

Pansy had gone from the girl who wanted everyone to envy her to being a self-imposed wallflower that no one would notice.

Ron just wondered exactly when he had.

Turning his face from her very quickly, he sat up and looked towards the lake. The late fall still hadn't stolen the lush colour of it and the surrounding land quite yet. The blue was still a deep blue and the grass still a vibrant green in the brilliant gold of the sun. So much life exuded from the depths of the colours that surrounded him.

Softly smiled, he looked towards Pansy. She was oblivious to him as she worked feverishly: erasing; changing pencils; changing to other instruments that he didn't know the name of. She worked as if she was racing a deadline. That whatever she was doing was so important, that it just had to be done or she would never be satisfied – never able to move on until she was finished.

"What are you working on?" he asked.

"Nothing," she replied. His heart broke as he watched her remove the quills from her hair; her hair tumbling down, hiding her face.

Sighing, he turned his head away before mumbling, "I wish you didn't feel like you had to hide from me too."

He felt like an ass for saying it out loud but it was the truth. After everything they had been through together, he didn't understand why she felt it necessary to hide from him. He knew everything that she hid from every other student at Hogwarts. They really had no secrets from one another anymore; so he couldn't understand the wall she kept trying to put up between them.

He wished he could make her pain go away; the one that drove her more and more internally – away from everybody, including him. Ron knew deep down, somehow, if she pulled away from him – there would be nothing left for her.

So he sat there silent; trying to find the words to apologize.

A gentle hand brushed against his cheek, clearing away the tear he hadn't realized was falling. Turning his head, he saw Pansy kneeling next to him; her own eyes glassy.

"I'm sorry," she whispered, her hazel eyes pleading behind her thick black lashes.

"Don't be," he told her; reaching out to touch her face, cupping her cheek gently. "I'm the one being the arse here."

"No, you're not," he heard her say as he watched a tear escape her eye. Gently, he wiped it away as she mouthed, "Please help me."

"You didn't and don't have to ask," Ron explained.

He wasn't prepared for her to launch at him, wrapping her arms around his neck. Pulling her completely into his lap, he started to rock her, "We're in this together. Deal?"

Pansy didn't say a word. However, Ron took her nodding head against his neck to be her capitulation.


	16. Taste

**Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter. Nor do I make any money.**

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**Taste**

After another emotionally draining day, they sat at the end of the nearly empty Slytherin table for some peace and quiet in the otherwise loud Great Hall. Neither said much as they silently ate their meals. Occasionally one of Pansy's Slytherin housemates would start to approach but would quickly turn away and return to their seat.

"I'm a pariah," she whispered, her face hanging down as she stopped eating after Tracy Davis' approached and then turned away at the last minute. Ron turned to look at her and saw that her face had become hidden behind her curtain of hair again.

"No you're not," he told her, pulling her hair back and tucking it behind her ear so he could see her face. "Your housemates are just...well they are..."

"Arseholes?" she supplied, looking up to him.

Ron tried to find another word but finally agreed, "I was going to go with...well...yeah actually..."

What he was going to say next became lodged on his tongue when he saw his sister approach and take a seat across from him and Pansy.

"I was wondering where the two of you were hiding. I've been looking for you since classes ended," she said cheerfully. Grabbing the fork out of Ron's hand she took a bite off of Ron's plate, ignoring the stunned looks on both Ron's and Pansy's faces. They had both become accustomed to the standoffish behaviour of their classmates since everything had happened that neither one knew what to say.

Ginny didn't appear phased at all. Handing the fork back to Ron, she asked, "You're right, the trifle does taste better with raspberries. Anyway, that's not why I've been looking for the two of you for the last three hours. Harry and I were going to go to Hogsmeade tomorrow for butterbeers at the Three Broomsticks around lunch. Do you two want to join us?"

Ron just continued to stare at his sister, still speechless while Pansy hung her head.

"I'm going to take that as a yes," she said standing up. "Be ready by eleven. Harry and I will meet you two in the eighth year common room. Don't plan to avoid us," she added with a wink, directed at Ron, "we will find you."

Ron just watched his sister scamper back off to the Gryffindor table and take a seat between Harry and Hermione. His eyes briefly caught Hermione's. He felt sick to his stomach as he watched her eyes water before she ran away from the table and the Great Hall.

"Is your sister serious?" Pansy asked, as she played with her food. With her head still down, she didn't see Hermione run out of the Great Room crying or Ron watch her do so.

Shaking his head, trying to erase the guilt he was feeling that he _didn't_ want to go after Hermione, Ron replied, "Unfortunately. Are you up to the Three Broomsticks? If not, I can call Ginny off."

Ron turned his attention to Pansy, watching her as she just sat there. He started mentally planning on how he was going to throttle his sister later for even thinking that Pansy would be ready for something like that. Pansy struggled with just attending classes, since she had only been released from the infirmary two days ago. He figured he would spend tomorrow with her, where ever she wanted to go.

"Do you want to go?" he heard her whisper.

Stunned didn't begin to describe what he was feeling, finding himself also speechless at the moment. So when she turned to look at him, he watched a small smile form on her face but he found himself unable to respond; even to question where that smile was coming from.

"I guess we are going then," she said casually before turning back to her food.

"Are you sure?" he asked. "Absolutely, positively sure?"

"Yes."

"Really?"

"Yes," she said exasperated, turning her face to look at him.

"Are you sure?"

"You've already asked that."

"You know you don't..."

"Just because I've become a pariah to my friends doesn't mean you have to."

"Pansy..."

"Stop it. We are going."

Ron did a double take – for a moment, he thought he saw the Slytherin Ice Princess again. He just couldn't believe _that_ made his day.

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_A/N: The next chapter won't be up until Tuesday. I start back at work on Monday from my summer vacation._


	17. Sunset

**Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter. Nor do I make any money.**

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**Sunset**

At sunset, Pansy found herself curled up in the window of the Gryffindor boy's room watching the sky change a thousand colours. With Ron in the shower, she found herself alone and though it unnerved her, she knew nothing would come of her in Ron's room; not with Neville studying on his own bed just feet away from her. At least, Neville had convinced Ron of that and that was good enough for her. If Ron trusted Neville, then she should trust Neville because of a single reason – Ron hadn't let her down yet.

Her mind wandered in amazement as she thought about the earlier trip to Hogsmeade. She hadn't anticipated enjoying the trip into Hogsmeade as much as she had. Especially the time they had spent at the Three Broomsticks with Harry and Ginny. Pansy had expected it to be awkward, that she would be the fourth wheel but she never felt like that. Not once. Ginny and Harry, it appeared, to have gone out of their way to make sure she was included in every conversation though she had kept quiet the entire time they were there.

She was glad that she had gone for no other reason than to have seen Ron smile earlier. He had been by her side unwavering since the beginning and she was afraid that it was taking its toll; he didn't seem to smile as much as she vaguely remembered him doing before. It hadn't struck home that he may have been affected to until yesterday as they sat out by the lake. When he had muttered to her about not having to hide from him too – it struck a chord in her.

When she had spun her head to look at him, she saw the hurt in his face and in turn, that had hurt her. That hurt was the final motivation she needed for her to finally ask him for his help, though she knew she needn't have. It had been there from the beginning but she had been to proud to verbalize the request until that moment; the very moment when she knew she was not the only one scarred from that night. It surprised her that the simple gesture of just asking for his help, gave her that little something she needed and could cling to as she really started to move on with her life.

"Thanks for coming out today. I know it had to be hard on you," an unfamiliar voice broke her from her thoughts. Turning her head around, she saw Harry take a seat on Ron's bed as he said, "But it really meant a lot to Ginny."

Pansy was surprised. She had figured that the invitation was Ron's sake and not Ginny's.

"It's just that she worries about him more than any of her other brothers," Harry explained. Pansy realized she must have had a confused look on her face because he continued, "He's probably the most independent of the Weasleys though you would never guess it. He thinks of everyone first and has this tendency to forget himself and what he wants and needs."

Pansy felt horrible at Harry's confession. She had never thought that she was tearing him away from his family. Tears welling up in her eyes, she stumbled over what she was trying to say, "I'm sorry, I never..."

"No, no, I didn't mean to make you feel bad," Harry said quickly. "It's that you've become his priority and that's fine – you need him – we get that. In a way, I think he needs you too...but we just want to make sure he takes care of himself, so he can be there for you."

She found herself unable to speak but nodded instead. Gathering her wits as best she could, she whispered, "Why?"

"Why what?" Harry asked perplexed.

"Why are you being so nice? I've not been a nice person or a good person all these years to you and your friends?" The question had been on her mind for some time but Ron would never give her an honest answer. In fact he kept avoiding the question when it came up..

"Because almost three weeks ago, I witnessed my best mate walk into our dormitories in a blood soaked tie and shirt, no cloak, and dried blood on his face and hands. I had to pull Hermione off him just so he could get to this room. When I came to bed later, he was wide awake in his bed sitting, starring out that window, still covered in blood."

"I don't think he ever went to sleep that night because of the way he looked at breakfast. I asked him where he had been since he wasn't in the dorm when I woke up and he told me that he had gotten up early to check on you. He said he had to make sure you were okay."

"Pansy, if you matter that much to him, you matter enough for the rest of us to care regardless of what happened anytime before that night; none of his friends or family are going to let anything happen to you because of him."

Pansy didn't know what to say, even if she could find her voice, articulate her thoughts, or move her lips and tongue.

"Hey, what are you two talking about?" She spun her head to look at Ron who was dressed in his bed attire, his hair soaking wet. For the second time in two days, bleary-eyed, she launched herself at him. She felt him take a couple of steps back as she wrapped her arms around his neck before his arms wrapped around her waist. The tears she had been fighting, started to run down her face and his neck.

She let him rock her as he tried to soothe her in his arms. Pansy felt him try to move her but she clung to him harder until he finally sighed and swung her legs up and walked somewhere to sit down. He continued to rock her until she finally feel asleep.


	18. Laugh

**Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter. Nor do I make any money.**

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**Laugh**

Ron didn't know what to think the moment Pansy raced from the window seat with tears in her eyes. He barely had time to catch his balance the moment she half-way crashed and half-way leaped at him; wrapping her arms tightly around his neck. He thought today had been a good day. She had seem to enjoy herself in Hogsmeade, even at the Three Broomsticks, though she remained unwaveringly quiet the entire time.

He tried to pull her off him so he could try and talk to her but she wouldn't budge. Sighing, he swung her lower legs so he could carry her better before moving to the window seat where he could at least sit while he tried again.

But nothing he did or said, could get her to loosen her grip on him.

Giving up, he just rocked her until she stopped crying.

Breathing a sigh of relief once she was asleep, he turned to look at Harry who was still sitting on the bed, when Harry said, "Sorry about that."

"Why? You did nothing," Ron replied, his hand still stroking her arm idly. He watched as a guilty look came over Harry's face, Ron left out a loud sigh and asked, "Okay what did you do?"

"She asked me a question and I told her the truth. The next thing I know you announced your presence and she took off running for you."

Rolling his eyes, Ron asked, "Do I even want to know?"

"I don't know," Harry replied shrugging his shoulders. "She just asked why we were being so nice to her especially because of how she treated all of us in the past."

"And what did you tell her?"

"In a nutshell – she mattered to you, so she mattered to us."

"And that caused her to cry like this?" Ron looked at his best mate incredulously, wanting to gesture with his hands but finding Pansy had a death grip on his free arm. "You know one of these days I may actually get my arm back."

"Not if she has anything to do with it," Harry laughed. "Every time I see her asleep, she has a death grip on you."

"Oh I know, you should see the indention marks on my arm. I think they may be permanent."

"You know Ron," Harry said thoughtfully after a few minutes of silence. "Seeing as how the Slytherins basically abandoned her after the attack and that the Gryffindors are the ones taking care of her now – it may not be so surprising that my comments caused her to react that way. All of us are sticking our necks out for someone who would never have done the same in the past."

Looking down at the sleeping girl in his arms, as Harry spoke Ron realized that Harry did have a point as he brushed her hair out of her face. He couldn't really expect anything less if he thought about it. At her lowest point, she had been abandoned by her friends only to be taken in and cared for by her enemies – that had to be emotionally hard to hear, see or even comprehend after all she had been through.

Looking back at Harry, Ron replied, "You have a point. Speaking of our favorite people, do you..." Ron trailed off because he wasn't actually sure anymore what he wanted to ask Harry.

"If you want to know, if anyone of them has asked about her – you'd be surprised."

"What do you mean?"

"Well, Malfoy came and talked to me and Ginny last night and Tracy Davis keeps approaching Ginny but backing off at the last minute."

"She kept doing that last night at dinner too but Malfoy?"

"I know. The amazing bouncing ferret approached us."

"What did he have to say?"

"He had noticed Hermione watching the two of you sleep in the common room when the rest of us thought she was studying and he wanted to let us know."

"Why?"

"Ginny and I think it was just his way of trying to look out for her," he said nodding towards Pansy. "Seeing what we all saw in Potions the other day, seems to have shaken him up. And now it's too late for him to do anything else. But with Tracy, it may do her good if you just approached her and let her know Pansy is okay."

Ron nodded, his eyes falling once again to Pansy who was shifting in his lap, softly he said, "I did talk to Hermione last night."

"I know," Harry nodded. "She told me this morning at breakfast. If you don't mind, please give her all the space she needs."

"I will. I just feel awful doing what I did to her. She deserves so much better than me."

"That's good to know, so I don't have to beat you up later as her surrogate brother but on the other hand, don't beat yourself up to terribly either. The war changed both of you and though it pulled you together at first, the changes made you both to incompatible now. I'm glad this happened now then down the road when it could have gotten really messy."

Ron just stared at his best mate, completely unsure if he heard him correctly. Especially since his mind kept running back to Harry's reactions every time he saw him and Hermione snogging the first several weeks after the battle.

"Don't look at me like that," Harry laughed, standing up. "Hermione and you together is like watching your parents. However, the war made her less like your mother and you a lot less like your father. So somehow it stopped working after the newness wore off. This was bound to happen at some point. Just focus on Pansy for the time being – she needs you too much. If you need anything, you'd better let us know. I'll have Ginny hex the Slytherins into submission if we need too."

Ron couldn't help himself. He had to laugh. The rumbling in his chest caused Pansy to stir which stopped him instantly. He didn't want to wake her.

He watched Harry exit with a grin on his face. Turning his head to look out at the surrounding countryside that was illuminated by the full moon, Ron's smile grew larger at the thought of Ginny hexing anybody into submission because he knew better than any body just how scary she was.


	19. Promise

**Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter. Nor do I make any money.**

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Promise**

Sitting on a sofa in the common room, Ron was desperately trying to stay awake while he waited on Pansy to finish getting ready for the day. He hadn't slept much the night before because his mind had been racing thinking about where Pansy fit into his life exactly, while not entirely sure he liked exactly what his mind was telling him. On top of that, Pansy was such an earlier riser that he was now waking – whether he wanted to or not – when she did.

Rubbing his eyes for the umpteenth time, he felt the cushion next to him sink partially. Assuming that it was Pansy he asked, "You ready for breakfast?" without looking up.

"Actually she's still getting ready," a soft, unfamiliar female voice replied. He couldn't think of one girl he knew that had such a husky voice.

Opening his eyes, he saw Tracy Davis sitting next to him; dressed and ready to go for the days' classes. He asked apprehensively, "What can I do for you Davis?"

"Tracy if you don't mind," she replied nervously, wringing her hands together. "Pansy's much more like the boys in that arena than I am. I don't understand it all – the necessity to call someone by their surname – barbaric if you ask me."

"Okay Tracy, what can I do for you?" Ron asked again, trying hard not to laugh at the rambling girl sitting beside him. He found her behaviour this morning strangely amusing especially since she seemed to be channeling Luna at the moment.

"I know I don't have the right to ask, given my behaviour over the past couple of weeks, so feel free to tell me to stuff it, I know I probably would if the roles were reversed, but I really would like to know how she is doing?"

Ron felt sorry for the girl and with a soft smile, he told her, "She's doing as well as can be expected given everything."

"That's good, sorry to bother you, I appreciate you telling..."

"But why don't you ask her yourself," Ron asked interrupting. "I can't promise she won't be nasty and say mean things at first but I think you should try."

"You do know what the number one rule is amongst the Slytherins – always look out for number one."

To say that Ron was taken aback, would have been the understatement of the year. Her tone had changed so suddenly from gentle and unsure to cold and harsh. He couldn't believe that this was the same girl who had been approaching and retreating from several people for most of the weekend in an attempt they all believed to find out how Pansy was doing. Now she was sitting next telling him _that_? With that much _disdain_?

"And here I thought you were trying to be her friend," he asked coolly.

"Slytherin's don't have friends, we have allegiances," she said standing up and walking away without a look back.

"Then why ask?" he called out after her as she took her leave from the common room.

"Because we only have friends when no one is looking," came a quiet voice from behind him. Turning around, he was greeted by Millie Bulstrode sweet face. "As long as Pansy is a pariah to her own family. None of us can be her friend, even behind closed doors."

If that didn't floor Ron, her whispered comment that he barely heard himself did.

"Thank you for taking care of her. I'm sorry we can't help you. But if it gets too bad, promise me you will go to Draco? He's probably the only one of us who can help you in the end."


	20. Formal

**Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter. Nor do I make any money.**

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Formal  
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Pansy hunched over her sketchbook as she worked furiously in the back of the DADA classroom while the practical portion of the class was going on. She normally would never have brought her sketchbook out with this many people around but she had finished all of her homework. That and she found she couldn't stop herself from wanting to capture something she saw as the DADA students dueled each other, working on offensive and defensive strategies.

She had had some formal art training when she was younger but it had been cast aside when she started Hogwarts. Her parents started focusing and pushing her to make valuable allegiances. Ultimately, their goal was for her to secure the best marriage for when school ended. With all the appearances, manipulations, and planning that those kind of matches required, there was never time for formal training anymore. Pansy never minded though. She never thought she was really that good at drawing anyway but it did helped her relax so she just did it anyway for fun.

Occasionally, she would look up to find the detail she was missing in trying to capture Ron's face as he dueled Nott. She didn't have to worry about Nott, she had drawn him a million times before; she even knew about the small mole he had behind his left ear. Once she thought she had it, she would bury her head back into her arm before continuing her work; trying to do Ron's intensity, passion, commitment, honour, and determination adequately.

Though she was focused on capturing every detail of Ron, she never realized that she, herself, was being watched.

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After dismissing the eighth years, Bill Weasley sat back in his chair, folding his hands behind his head. He had several minutes before the third years would start running in for their class.

Using his time to collect his thoughts, his mind focused on the Parkinson girl who had been sitting in the back of his classroom. He had noticed the exact moment she had put away her homework as her eyes slowly scanned the room back and forth for several minutes. The behaviour had intrigued him so he allowed her to continue without his interruption while he wondered about what exactly she was going to do.

He hadn't been sure what to expect but he was sure he hadn't expected her to pull a large notebook worn from lots of wear from her bag and a small bag. Bill took a step back at first out of the way of his dueling students to watch further. He was surprised to see her flip through pages before settling on one and then as if what she was working on was some great secret, she stretched her arm around the book protectively and laid her head down on it.

If he hadn't been paying attention to her unusual behaviour from the beginning, he would have been concerned but now he was just curious. He tried several times to move towards her to get a better look but she always seemed to know when he was near by and quickly stopped whatever she was working on. The page, he had been able to steal a glimpse at, had been blank when he was finally able to get close enough to take a look without her clamming up around the notebook protectively..

Kicking his feet up and resting them on his desk, Bill noticed a folded piece of parchment that hadn't been there before. On top of it lay a scrap of parchment with a simple message in a eloquent, stylized hand –

_This will be the longest I have gone without this near me since it was given. As such I would like the parchment back as soon as you are done. Unfortunately it was the last thing she ever gave to me and I know it will be hard to believe, but it does mean the world to me; as all her gifts did. To me and everyone who once could freely care. _

Putting aside the scrap, he tentatively touched the parchment unsure; more because of the ominous tone of the note, than a worry of dark magic. Bill felt horrified at the thought that the person who had originally given the parchment was no longer a part of this world any longer. Feeling no lingering touches of magic from his tentative touches, he carefully opened the parchment up and gasped at what he saw.

Laying the parchment gently on his desk, he studied the beautiful drawing of Blaise Zabini laughing at some unknown joke.

The artist had captured every detail of the young man with stunning accuracy: the sculpted cheek bones; the hooded eyes that held a twinkle within; the thick full lips with rows of perfect white teeth; his dark skin that appeared so soft and smooth; his cloths appearing to move with the gesture. The drawing appeared to have been done only with charcoal, though the absence of colour did nothing to distract from the liveliness of the picture – every detail lovingly captured and distinct. Bill found himself ready for his student to jump out of the paper.

But there was a detail out of place, one that suddenly explained everything to Bill.

Instead of the usual snake pin that Zabini wore in his tie, there was a pansy within the curl of the snake – almost invisible to the casual observer.

Bill sat back in his seat. His eyes never leaving the image of Zabini while he wondered why Zabini's note made it seem like Pansy was dead, when she had just been in the same classroom as him just minutes ago.


	21. Memory

**Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter. Nor do I make money.**

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**Memory**

_A/N: I started playing towards the end of this piece. My goal is try to capture something I experienced in a similar situation. If it helps – think about what you would see visually in a film depicting the scene.  
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"Miss Parkinson, Miss Bones, would you please go to Greenhouse Three and collect two mandrakes for us to use in class today," Professor Sprout said, her back to the class as she continued to write today's instructions on the board as students filed in.

"I'll go for you, if you would like," Ron whispered to Pansy as she stood.

"It's okay," she replied with a soft smile before following Susan in the direction of Greenhouse Three. "We won't be five minutes."

He didn't know if she knew how her innocent touch lingered as her fingers trailed down his arm before walking away. Hell, he wasn't entirely sure if he liked the fact the _he knew_ her innocent touch lingered as her fingers trailed down his arm before walking way.

His eyes followed her and Susan back towards the door that would take them to Greenhouse Three and then waited for her return.

"You know," Harry's voice echoed in his ear. "She's just going to be gone a few minutes."

"I know," Ron sighed, turning back towards the front of the classroom. "I just worry."

"I know," Harry replied with a laugh. "Actually, we all know."

"What is that suppose to mean?" Ron growled, narrowing his eyes to look at his purported best mate.

Harry smirked, "Nothing, nothing at all."

"Tell me," he growled again.

"Now where's the fun in that?" his supposed best mate replied, laughing out loud.

"Mr. Weasley, Mr. Potter, is there something you'd like to share with the rest of your classmates?"

Professor Sprout's question prevented Ron from interrogating Harry any further as they both snapped to attention and responded in quick tones, "No ma'am."

"Then close your traps and pay attention."

"Yes ma'am," they intoned before attempting to pay attention to Sprout's rambling lecture.

Everything was going fine until Ron realized that he had taken four lines of notes and Pansy hadn't returned. Without bothering to ask, he spun out of his seat and headed to Greenhouse Three.

"Mr. Weasley," he heard Professor Sprout call his name but he didn't respond.

"Mr. Weasley."

"Mr. Weasley."

"Ron."

He heard Harry's voice as he hit the door that would take him to Greenhouse Three but he didn't stop. He didn't even bother to look back. Taking two steps outdoors, he saw Susan lying on the ground just in front of the greenhouse but no Pansy.

Panic flooded through him as he took off running. His mind focused on a single task – getting to Pansy.

"Professor Sprout!"

"Ron!"

"Ron!"

Ron heard footfalls following him but he didn't turn around.

Bursting through the greenhouse door, he didn't see Pansy but a cloaked figure in the near distance.

Casting a stunning spell, he watched as it merely bounced off the cloaked figure. Ron kept moving forward sending spell after spell until the cloaked figure took off towards the very back of the greenhouse. He watched as Pansy fell to the floor in a heap.

Ron tore off his cloak as he ran to her.

Images flickering in front of him between memories and reality.

Her body broken and beaten in the moonlight.

Her cuts reopened, now bleeding.

Her uniform torn.

Her uniform missing.

Blood gurgling from her mouth.

Blood pouring from the cut on her face.

Her unconscious. Barely breathing.

Her conscious. Crying.

He fell to his knees as she pulled herself up; barely having time to wrap his cloak around her before she threw her arms around him.

"I'm so sorry," he whispered over and over again as he pulled her into his body while she cried his name over and over again as she clung to him.

His tears fell onto her wet face. Her tears and blood soaking his shirt and tie. _Again_.


	22. Denial

**Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter. Nor do I make money.**

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**Denial**

"Not again," Headmistress McGonagall whispered horrified as she entered the infirmary wing that was crowded with eighth years; she had been hoping that there had been some mistake. Some miscommunication from an out of breath Hannah Abbott who was prone to exaggeration anyway. The entire time she hurried to the infirmary wing, she had wished that Ms. Parkinson hadn't been attacked brutally again. But seeing the eighth year faces, she knew Ms. Abbott had been telling the truth..

She was not surprised to see all the Gryffindors there, including Ms. Granger, or the Hufflepuffs and Ravenclaws she knew to be friendly with Weasley but she was shocked to see all the Slytherins there. All their faces the same. Girls with dried tears and red, swollen faces; boys trying to hide what they were feeling and relented to just offering the girls comfort in their arms.

"Where is Mr. Weasley, Mr. Potter?" she asked having noted that the one person, she expected to be there wasn't.

Mr. Potter gestured his head to the screen and explained, "He's in there Pansy; she wouldn't let him leave."

Nodding, she was about to go around the screen when Madame Pomfrey came around.

"How is she?"

"Whoever it was only managed to reopen some of her cuts," she whispered, knowing that they had an audience. An audience she hadn't wanted but in the end had been powerless to stop all the eighth years from coming in who wanted to be there – especially with Mr. Potter and Mr. Malfoy leading the charge.

"She wasn't..."

"No Minerva, but he did cast an heir charm on her. I think we need to send her home. She isn't safe here whoever it is won't stop, especially not now."

"How long before it renders her incapable of resisting its demands?"

"She isn't bonded so that narrows it down to maybe two dozen. So anywhere between three months and twenty years but that doesn't include any familiar spells that might also have the same purpose. As she can't remember the incantation, Minerva, it just isn't safe for her here."

"I agree. I'll let her know and have Professor Slughorn take her to her parents' after you release her."

"You can't do that Headmistress."

She spun around, not realizing that she hadn't lowered her voice with her response and that the eighth years had heard her. There standing in front of her was Draco Malfoy looking quite resolute.

"Do what Mr. Malfoy?"

"You can't send her to her parents'."

"Mr. Malfoy," Professor McGonagall said firmly. "After everything that has happened, it would be best for her to return to her parents for the time being. She would be safe there."

"And I'm saying it would be the worst thing you could do to her. There is no such thing as safety in the confines of Parkinson Manor for her."

She didn't know what next surprised her more –

Blaise Zabini getting to his feet and saying, "Draco's right."

Theo Nott adding, "Her parent's home is the worst place for her now."

Millie Bulstrode quietly saying, "If you send her home, none of us will see her again."

Tracy Davis looking at her feet, "The disowning charm will be cast. The Parkinson one is powerful enough to turn her into a Squib."

Daphne Greengrass sighing, "As well as render her mute. She will be sent away to her aunt in the Orkney Isles."

Horrified looks came over all the other eighth years before they turned to Professor McGonagall –

Harry Potter stepping up to Mr. Malfoy's side, "Let her stay here with her friends."

Neville Longbottom saying, "We will take responsibility for her safety."

Ernie McMillan adding, "We will take shifts, someone will be with her at all times; in addition to Ron."

Padma Pavarti pointing out, "We've fought a war Professor McGonagall. Let us protect one of our own."

Then to everyone's shock, Hermione Granger spoke up, "Let her stay. For no other reason than Ron. If she goes, so will he."

Professor McGonagall had seen a lot of things in forty years of teaching but this was new to her.

"So it's settled," Mr. Malfoy perked up. "Pansy's staying."

Professor McGonagall looked at him sternly, knowing that she hadn't agreed to anything of the sort. She could think of a million reasons why Ms. Parkinson shouldn't stay and only one reason she should.

Sighing, she relented. "Yes, Mr. Malfoy, Ms. Parkinson is staying."

"Good," he replied spinning and heading out of the infirmary to the surprise of everyone but the other Slytherins.

Once their surprise wore off, the other eighth years and Professor McGonagall turned to the Slytherins remained looking for an explanation.

"He's going to take responsibility for our actions," Millie Bulstrode was the first to say.

Theo Nott added, "So our families won't disown us either – something only his father can prevent."


	23. Arrows

**Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter. Nor do I make any money.**

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**Arrows**

A/N: When I saw the prompt, I immediately thought of the arrow paradox – very basic explanation in relationship to this piece is to think of this piece as containing snapshots, scenes at a particular instance of time. In my defense, my university degree is in mathematics and art history. Also the day I wrote this piece I had read this wonderful ficlet by LJ user tania_sings – "In Pictures" which provided the rest of the inspiration. This may be my favorite piece written to date.

**Warning** – this piece is very experimental, **but** you should get a glimpse of how my imagination works as I write. After reading this go look at the paintings by Joaquin Sorolla (especially "Mending the Sail" from 1896) and you will have a complete picture of how scenes appear in my head.

Forgiveness.

An infirmary. Rows of beds empty of patients except hers. Highlighted by coloured light streaming in from stain glass windows. He was sitting on her bed. His body touching hers. His hands cupping both sides of her face. His body leaning over. His head down in prayer. His eyes closed as were her's. His tie gone. His sleeves rolled up. Red stains covering his shirt. Him begging for her forgiveness. Her hands wrapped tightly around around his wrists. Her pleading with him. Begging him to hear her offer of absolution. Tears on her bandaged cheek. A group of boys. A group of girls. Intermingled. All in uniform. All watching the pair. Watching and waiting.

Sorrow.

The same infirmary. Different time. Different day. Same boy. He sits in a wingback chair. It stands by her bed. Legs outstretched resting on the bed. Hands folded resting on his lap. Head titled, chin resting on his chest. He is asleep. Same Girl. A white cotton night dress. Red scar across her neck. Several across her arm. Thick scars on her legs. Wide awake. Hazel eyes focused on the boy. Standing in front of him. Leaning over. Her hand brushing his hair out of his face. Tear falling. Still silently pleading with the sleeping boy. Begging him to forgive himself. New Boy sitting on another bed watching in the shadows. Glasses on his face. Legs pulled up to his chest. Arms wrapped around his legs. Wand in his hand. Eyes glued to the girl watching the boy. Watching the moment in unspoken awe.

Penance.

A hallway. Different time. Different day. Same boy, tall and lanky. Same girl, petite and delicate. Walking. Both in uniforms: slacks, collared shirt, sweaters. Cloaks bellowing behind. His tie, red and gold. Her tie, green and silver. His red hair, long and shaggy. Her black hair, longer and straight. Both heads hung down low. He carries two school bags. She holds onto his sleeve. Not his arm. Not his hand. His sleeve. Heads are turned around them. Looking at them. Most in sadness. Others in concern. Those have their wands at ready.

Absolution.

A common room. Different time. Different day. Same boy. Same girl. Both in jeans. His quidditch jersey is orange. Hers is his. He sits in an easy chair. She sits in his lap. Her legs over his. Her head resting on his shoulder. Pressing into his neck. Her eyes closed. Her hand resting on his chest. Covering his heart. His hand covering hers. She is a sleep. His lips pressed to the top of her head. His eyes closed. Accepting the absolution she has freely offered. Silver grey eyes watching the pair; deep in the shadows. His wand in his hand. A knowing soft smile on his face.

Peace.

A bed. Crimson curtains trimmed in gold hanging from the tester. Early morning. Soft morning light illuminating the two sleeping bodies. Crimson and gold coverlet covering two bodies. Same boy. Same girl. He lays on his side. So does she. She is wearing a tank. Red scars peaking out from the tank. His bare arm wrapped around her. White scars litter his forearms. A glimpse of a naked shoulder. Holding her against his body. Her head below his. Tucked. His chin resting on her head. On the same shared pillow. His eyes are closed. Her eyes too. Faces relaxed. Lips slightly open. Both asleep. Both at peace. A girl watches from another bed. Her red hair pulled back. Her wand in her hand. A relieved smile on her face.


	24. Sudden

**Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter nor do I make any money.**

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Prompt 24 – Sudden

The world stopped today.

At least as far as Pansy was concerned.

Gasps perforated the silence surrounding the pitch as everyone watched in horror as Ron Weasley fell from his broom in the Quidditch match against Ravenclaw.

Pansy took off from the stands, her mind empty. Her overwhelming urge to reach Ron took over her instincts. She had already run down two flights of stairs before she heard footsteps clamoring behind her.

"Pansy. Wait!"

"Pansy!" She heard another voice yell her name but she didn't stop.

Then a third. A fourth. A fifth.

Then she lost count.

Finally she reached the ground. Turning, she ran out onto the field towards where Ron had fallen; and the other Quidditch players stood. The students in the stands watching in morbid fascination.

She heard her name again but she kept running.

Potter was running towards her with Ginny on his heels.

Pansy didn't get any further once Potter was close enough to touch.

He grabbed her. Wrapping his arms around her body. Holding her.

She screamed. She yelled. She drummed her fists against his chest.

Screaming at him to let her go. Yelling at him to let her go to Ron. Each word punctuated by a thud to his chest.

But he still held on.

As she fought. Kicked. Screamed. Trying to get away from Potter. Trying to get to Ron.

Her heart stopped as she saw Ron's limp body.

Her words caught in her throat as she saw Ron placed on a stretcher.

Her eyes watered when she realized he wasn't moving.

She screamed as she saw the stretcher levitated. Before collapsing against Harry sobbing.

Unable to articulate anything, even if she wanted to.

Unable to believe that her world could fall apart so suddenly.

Before everything started to close in. Just before it went black.


	25. Neutral

**Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter nor do I make any money.**

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Prompt 25 – Neutral

Pansy found herself in neutral.

She couldn't move forward and she certainly couldn't move back.

Even if there was something to move back too. Something had changed her.

She just wasn't sure what that something was.

It wasn't the night of the attack. She was sure of that though it had left its evidence brutally on her body.

She was pretty sure it wasn't the day of the next attack. Though it was only a matter of time before that one would change her body too.

Something else had changed. Something deep with in.

She just wasn't sure what it is.

But she had a sinking suspicion it had to do with the red head lying unconscious in the infirmary in front of her. Because she vaguely remember the horror as the bludger hit him. She remembered a little more the emptiness that washed over her as she saw him fell. Then the panic. Then more panic.

She had never felt more fear in her life as she did in that moment.

Something had changed her.

She knew she couldn't move back.

And she had a sneaky suspicion that she couldn't move forward – without him at least.

So she sits by his bed under the watchful eye of her former friend silently urging him to wake up.

So she can move forward and stop being stuck in neutral.


	26. Thousands

**Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter nor do I make any money.**

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Prompt 26 - Thousands

A/N: Warning – I'm playing. This idea hit me during another story (for that version check out 'Midnight' from _These Days). _The prompt urged me to go in the same direction again. Oh, and this piece will overlap the time frame of 'Neutral'.

Ron fell at 3:37PM.

23 minutes later (4PM) – Pansy found herself reacquainted with the infirmary with Ginny Weasley by her side. She had begged Ginny to tell her what was going on but Ginny's pale complexion and worried eyes stopped her from pursuing it any further. Pansy realized she wasn't the only one suffering now.

22 minutes, 20 seconds later (4:22PM) – Pansy, despite Madame Pomfrey's orders, had taken up a vigil by Ron's bed. Harry and Ginny sat on the bed across from her but next to Ron. No one looked at each other – only Ron, who looked so peaceful. Pansy thought that he looked like he was merely sleeping. She desperately wanted to shake him, to wake him. Luckily she found that gripping the chair arms as hard as possible was the only way not to give into the temptation

5 minutes, 45 seconds later (4:28PM) – Arthur and Molly Weasley came rushing into the infirmary. Another brother on their heels. Pansy remembered him as having a twin but couldn't remember his name. Pansy watched as Ginny ran to her mother, tears rolling down her face. Arthur and the twin moved to Harry to have a seat. Pansy just remained seated in her chair. Ignoring the emotional exchanges between mother and daughter, father and son; she just kept her eyes on Ron – not realizing that the twin really had his eyes on her.

1 hour, 12 minutes, 4 seconds later (5:40PM) – The Weasleys and Harry tried to get Pansy to come to dinner with them but she refused. She couldn't bring herself to leave his side. Going to the restroom was pushing it for her sanity. She just wished she could understand why she felt this way.

27 minutes later (6:07 PM) – Pansy realized she was in neutral; under Draco's watchful eyes. She couldn't move forward and she couldn't move back. The sneaking suspicion that Ron was to blame irritated her; she just couldn't quite put a finger on what that other feeling swelling in her chest was.

1 hour, 19 minutes, 27 seconds later (7:26PM) – The Weasleys had gone home for the evening with the promise from Madame Pomfrey that she would Floo if anything changed. Harry had sent Ginny to bed while Neville had joined them. Harry and Neville were playing Wizard's chess but she didn't pay them any attention.

4 minutes later (7:30PM) – She finally lost it.

23 seconds later (7:31PM) – Harry had her wrapped up in his arms as she sobbed. Telling Harry over and over again that she couldn't lose Ron. She just couldn't lose him. Why wouldn't he wake up, she screamed. He was needed here. She needed him, she gasped. She needed him here.

19 minutes, 45 seconds (7:50PM) – She screamed that she wanted him here; didn't he know that!

5 seconds later (7:51PM) – She was silent in Harry's arms. Realizing it had taken her thousands of seconds to realize what the feeling was in her chest.

Pansy just hoped that she would have thousands more seconds, minutes, hours, days, months to feel it.


	27. Spaces

**Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter nor do I make any money.**

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Prompt 27 – Spaces

Pansy found she couldn't fill the void she felt at that very moment.

No matter how hard she tried.

She couldn't get close enough; touch him enough; feel him enough; smell him enough for that hole in her chest to be satisfied.

Pansy stopped carrying what other people thought by the time, in a moment of desperation to cure the ache that was raging inside her, she climbed into bed next to a still unconscious Ron.

She rested her body as close as she could to his: her head laying in the crook of his neck; her chin touching his collarbone; her nose grazing his neck; her forehead touching his jaw; as her head rested on his pillow. Her hand now rested on his chest, occasionally going up on its finger tips; caressing his chest, reveling in the resilience of his heart still beating, his chest still rising.

She needed him to wake up – no she wanted him to wake up; she told herself – for the hundredth time since her heart-stopping, tear-ceasing realization not that long ago.

Her tears started to fall again as she whispered, pleading with him to wake up. To come back for his friends and for her. That she needed him. She needed her knight in shining armour. That she wanted her knight in shining armour.

She wanted him.

She wanted him to open his eyes. To tease her. To laugh. To let her hold his sleeve. To fix her food. To make her eat. To hold her. To not demand anything of her. To make her feel whole. To make her feel better. To make her feel like herself. Again.

Tears still rolling down from her eyes. Again, she pleaded with him to wake up; whispering into his ear. But there was no response.

She didn't know how long she cried, clinging to his body, until she gave in to the heaviness of her eyes, head, body and fell asleep curled up next to his body. Her hand in a death grip of the hospital gown; just above his heart willing it to come and start his mind – to make him come back to her.

Filling the void that wouldn't leave her.

As there was no other answer to filling the void.

Not now. Not ever.

Not since he had changed her.


	28. Excess

**Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter nor do I make any money.**

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Prompt 28 – Excess

His eyes opened.

Moonlight streamed in through the stain glass windows that lit the infirmary during the daytime. Blinking his eyes several times he tried to remove the persistent haze that clouded his vision.

He wondered briefly about why he was in the infirmary but the throbbing in his head prevented him from thinking to much further or harder than he must have been injured in today's Quidditch match against Ravenclaw.

Realizing that he had left Pansy alone sent him into a state panic. He tried to sit up but realized that there was a weight pressing into his side. Looking down, he saw Pansy lying beside him, her eyes starting to flutter. She moved just enough as she struggled to wake, to allow Ron to sit up though he quickly regretted the action due to the pounding that was going on in his head.

He watched her rub her eyes and then suddenly stop. Pansy removed her hands from her eyes. Her hazel eyes staring at him in disbelief, wide-eyed.

Ron wasn't sure exactly what happened next. One moment he was sitting up with a pounding headache looking down on the most important thing in his life; the next, he was flat on his back with a sprite of a girl straddling his lap pounding on his chest with her fists, crying and fussing at him for making her worry.

Initially, he thought the reaction was a bit excessive. However it didn't take long before he started thinking that it was the most beautiful sight in the world.

It took him a couple minutes to catch both of her flying fists. Holding tightly on to her wrists, he pulled her down so she was laying on top of his chest. Her chest heaving against his. Her face swollen, red and wet; a truly beautiful sight to Ron. Adjusting his hands so that both fists were restrained in one, he took his free hand and gingerly, caressed her face wiping away the tears.

"Ron," she whispered painfully, her voice cracking even on the simple word.

"I'm sorry princess," he whispered back, unable to stop himself from continuing to touch her face even though there were no more tears for him to wipe away. "I'm so sorry."

"I thought I was going to lose you."

"It's going to take a lot more than...what exactly happened?"

"You took a bludger to the head before you fell off of your broom," she explained, leaning into his caressing hand instinctively.

Ron couldn't tear his eyes away from her as his mind went into overdrive with what he really wanted to do at that moment. He watched her lean into his hand, her eyes closed, a look of peace starting to wash over her face. His breath hitched as she turned her head and placed a gentle kiss against the palm of his hand; her lips lingering there, causing Ron to forget how to actually breathe at the moment.

Yet somehow, he found a way to whisper her name breathlessly that sounded achy and desperate even to his own ears. Ron watched Pansy turn back to him with a soft smile on her face. A beautiful, gentle, soft smile that warmed more than just his heart.

He wanted nothing more at that moment than to capture her lips in a bruising kiss: to taste her; to claim her; to make her his and his alone.

His body froze at that thought with the cold reality of their situation pouring him over him. Here was the girl who needed him and he was drooling over her like a horny teenage wanker. He felt like such an arsehole.


	29. Purity

**Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter nor do I make any money.**

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Prompt 29 – Purity

Pansy didn't know what made her turn her head and gently kiss the palm of Ron's hand. The one that had only been gently caressing her face moments before.

But as her lips touched his palm: his smell overwhelmed her senses, her lips longed to feel his lips, her mind screamed at her to take a chance. To take _the_ chance, at that very moment to show him exactly how she felt about them; to tell him what she felt about him.

In her crowding mind, she hadn't even realized that she had lingered. That her lips had lingered against his palm until she heard her name.

And it was beautiful. Her name breathless on his tongue; in reverence to her ears.

Turning to face him, she smiled, his hand still on her face.

She moved her hands that he had released at some point to his face. One hand on each side. Touching him. Feeling his stubble against her palms and fingers.

She saw something in his eyes flash that sent a chill down her spine. She watched as his eyes grew darker before becoming clear.

Her eyes traveled down to his lips. The ones she had explored so many times at night. But only with her fingers. She wondered now how they would feel against her own; how would they taste. Gently with her thumb, she traced his lips before pulling lightly on the bottom one.

Looking back up for permission, she saw nothing she recognized. Though her body and instincts recognized something.

Leaning forward she gently pressed her lips to his. Feeling them under her lips. Tasting him. Reveling in him. She felt his other hand move to her face but it didn't stop her. Because it was clear that he didn't want her to stop. He was holding her in place as she was holding him.

Neither one ready to leave the kiss; the feeling; the satisfaction; the completeness.

Both ended the kiss at the same time. Pulling there faces apart. Their eyes met. Locked on the other. Their hands still holding their faces. The other's name breathless on their lips.

Before their lips met again.

This time there was no simple purity to the kiss; no chasteness. This one was about need; passion; want. This was more than just tasting and touching; this was about consuming, completing, and holding.

This was about feeding the void within; this was about banishing the loneliness from within.


	30. Enigma

**Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter nor do I make any money.**

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Prompt 30 - Enigma

On Monday, Pansy wore her hair up.

By Thursday, she wore a skirt instead of pants. It wasn't her normal length skirt. Instead it was the prescribed length by the Hogwarts dress code; just above the knee. She also wore hose instead of her trademark knee-highs.

Everyone noticed the change in her but didn't say a thing as they weren't quite sure what brought about the change.

There hadn't appeared to be any change to the wondering eye between Ron and Pansy. Still stuck to each other's side as they had been since she was first attacked. She still clung to the sleeve of his cloak as they passed the other students. They still sat by each other at lunch but no closer than any other friends of opposite sex. Nothing to suggest that their relationship had changed.

Harry asked Ron but he said nothing.

Draco asked Pansy but she said nothing.

Professor McGonagall asked Ron but he said nothing.

Professor Slughorn asked Pansy but she said nothing.

Though everything had changed. And they knew it. They knew it should scare them. And that they should take it slow.

But....

When no one was around, her hand slipped from his sleeve to his hand. Not holding it but allowing her fingers to graze his casually. There were shared kisses: gentle, tender, loving – out of the way of prying eyes. There were shared kisses: more heated and passionate, in his bed – after all others had gone to sleep.

Pansy was happy, so Ron was. Ron was happy, so Pansy was.

They were happy, so it was no one else's business.


	31. Snowflakes

**Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter nor do I make any money.**

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**Prompt 31 - Snowflakes  
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The first snowfall had come to Hogwarts.

Typically there would be several dozen students playing in the crisp, white snowfall. But today most were gathered in the doorway leading outside.

Some standing. Some sitting. All watching.

In awe. In amazement. In wonder. Tears filling most eyes. Some even running down their red faces.

All watching Pansy Parkinson.

Her face red too. Her eyes bright. Happiness in her smile. Joy in her eyes. Lightness in her laughter.

While Ron Weasley chased her.

Finally tackling her into a large snowbank.

And the last two weeks of whispers, finally had their truth realized.

As everyone watched the slow, gentle, tantalizing kiss between the two. That said so much but promised even more.


	32. Temptation

**Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter nor do I make any money.**

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Prompt 32 - Temptation  
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He watched them from the back.

Watched as red seeped into his field of vision. Anger seizing his fists. Fury latching on to his body.

He watched them from his hooded eyes.

Watched as Weasley kissed his prize. Tasting her lips. Feeling her body.

He watched them from his rigid stance.

Watched as she responded to him. Smiling. Laughing.

He watched them.

And he thought.

Tempted to take what was his.

Right here. Right now.

The Slytherin princess. His very own princess.

Right here. Right now.

Tempted to kill Weasley for touching what was his.

And he planned.

He planned his move.

Watching her respond to Weasley. Giggling. Happy.

He watched them from his rocking stance.

Watched as Weasley helped her up. Holding her hand. Caressing her face.

He watched them from his fury-filled eyes.

Watched as anger seized his vision in its entirety. Madness clenching his fists. Hatred flowing through his body.

He watched them from the back.

Before turning and stalking off; never seeing a set of cool, grey eyes narrow as he went on his way.


	33. Command

**Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter nor do I make any money.**

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Prompt 33 - Command  
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Pansy knew she was dragging her feet as she trailed slightly behind Ron.

But she couldn't think of one person who would blame her if they knew what she had done. Unbeknownst to everyone, including Ron (because she couldn't bring herself to burden him with yet another problem), she had sent a letter to her parents informing them that she would not be coming home as they commanded after _that_ night. She in fact informed them that she would be staying at Hogwarts for Christmas break; that she understood that she was no longer a Parkinson and as such felt that she no longer was required to submit to their dominance.

She knew Ron was confused as to why she had been summoned, supposedly 'out of the blue', to come to the Headmistress' office but Pansy knew exactly why. She knew her parents were there waiting for her. In fact, she fully expected them to either drag her out of there kicking and screaming or cast the charm that would officially make her disowned as well as turn her into a mute, Squib.

The moment they reached the statue guarding the Headmistress' office, Pansy found her feet unwilling or unable to continue. She watched as the statue slid aside so that someone could pass however she couldn't. She couldn't make her feet move one foot in front of the other.

Pansy watched as Ron entered the entryway to the office and take two steps before realizing that she hadn't crossed the threshold yet. He turned and walked back to her, his bright blue eyes full of concern. Her eyes started to water as he moved back to her.

"Pansy," he whispered, his hand reaching towards her face as he stood in front of her, before pleading, "Talk to me."

"I know why I was called here," she whispered back ashamed, she felt his other hand move to her face and her strength crumble. Crossing the inches that would take her to him, she threw herself into him; his arms wrapping around her body as she sobbed into his uniform. Mumbling the words through her tears, she sobbed, "My parents are up there. They will take me home. They will cast the charm. They are throwing me away."

Clinging to him, he rubbed her back as he whispered words to her. Words that she couldn't make out even if she tried. All she knew is that his hands didn't loosen; they just kept holding her as she tried to calm herself – to will herself that everything was going to be okay because Ron was here and he wouldn't let anything happen to her. He wouldn't let her parents hurt or take her away .

She just hoped that he would still take care of her, if they were able to cast the charm.

Because if not, she didn't know what she was going to do.

If she was even going to survive.

And that thought sent a new wave of tears rolling down her face as she clung to him harder; trying to believe the words of comfort he was whispering she could barely understand.

Her whole body was still shaking by the time Ron was able to coax her up the stairs and into the Headmistress' office. She clung to his robes tightly as she saw the confirmation of her worst fears that her parents were here in the Headmistress McGonagall's office.

"What is the meaning of this?" her father roared, her letter waving in his hands. "You are suppose to do what you are told. No questions asked. You were forgiven last time. It won't happen again."

Pansy froze on the spot at the unadulterated anger and hatred that streamed from her father's voice. Her body unable to move by itself, it allowed Ron to push her gently behind him, his arm pinning her to his backside as she clung desperately to his robes.

"Exactly what it says," Ron replied firmly, his stance so defiant, that it even took the Headmistress by surprise.

"I don't know who you think you are," Mr. Parkinson growled moving forward; though he wasn't a big man, his dark features and glowing hazel eyes were frightening. "But she is our daughter and she will do as she has been told. She has brought enough shame to this family. She will do it no more."

He reached out for her at the same moment that the arm Ron had her pinned to his body with shifted her just enough to keep him between her and her father as his wand found itself pressed to her father's throat.

Icily, Ron spat, "That's funny, I was under the distinct impression from the letter you sent her after she was brutally attacked and raped that you had no need for her anymore. That she was no longer your daughter, no longer a Parkinson."

"Listen, here..." her father started before Ron jabbed his wand up into his throat to remind him he was not in charge of the situation.

"I'm only going to say this once," Ron said, pressing his wand further into Mr. Parkinson's throat. "You _will_ leave her alone. You _will _never write her, Floo her, or contact her in anyway. You _will _no longer upset her. She has been through enough for this lifetime. _You_ say she is no longer _your daughter_, that's fine but you will not hurt her again as long as I breathe. Understood?"

"You little..."

Anything her father was about to say was cut off again. His mouth flopping up and down but no sound came out.

"I believe we are done Headmistress?" Ron said flippantly, lowering his wand.

Pansy watched as Headmistress McGonagall just nodded her head silently, her eyes still wide in shock at Ron's actions.

Ron said, "Good," before turning around, his body still shielding hers from her parents before pushing her down the stairs.

He didn't stop forcing Pansy to walk until they were back in the eighth year dormitory and in his empty bedroom. Sealing the door, he just looked at her and asked, "What didn't you tell me?"


	34. Tremble

**Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter nor do I make any money.**

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Prompt 34 - Tremble  
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"What didn't you tell me?"

Ron's voice firm and determined. Pansy couldn't help but shrink away from him – not out of fear but out of shame. Shame that she didn't have the courage to tell him exactly her family's plans were for her when he had been the only one there for her from the beginning.

"Pansy," his voice was gentle this time as he moved towards her with every step she took back, in a vain attempt to maintain the distance between them.

Eyes watering, her voice crackled as she rambled, "I'm so sorry but it's just they told me to come home and I didn't want to because they were going to cast the spell that would cast me out of the Parkinson's for good this time, making me mute and a Squib and then they would send me to my aunt Asteria who was cast out the same way for refusing to marry someone she didn't want to and I'll be trapped like her for the rest of my life on the family's private island amongst the Orkney Isles and I didn't and don't want to be sent away, I don't want to be thrown away not after everything I've been through, so I told them I wasn't coming home, that I would stay here for Christmas and I didn't want to burden anyone with everything else with this because I know I'm such a burden to you and to everyone and I don't want to be a burden, I hate being a burden to everyone so I thought I could handle it myself and..." her voice trailing off as her tears started to come down harder; her breathing descending into gasps – she was hardly able to take in air, let alone be able to speak.

Still backing away from Ron, she blindly found herself hitting a wall hard. Shaking, she slid down to the ground. Her body falling forward with her sobs; her hands barely catching her before she went face forward into the the floor.

"Pansy," she heard her name whispered.

"I'm so sorry," she gasped, her head hanging down. "I don't know why you put up with me. I'm nothing but trouble. I've been nothing but trouble since I was ten. I'm not good to anyone. I'm broken; used goods; disowned; a ki-..."

"No, you're not. You're beautiful, amazing, and talented," he whispered interrupting her. "I have never 'put up' with you. I have been here because in the beginning I needed to. I needed to know that you were going to be okay. But now I just want to be here. I want to be here with you, for you."

Her head popped up to stare at him in disbelief, she tried to continue, "But you deserve better than me. I'm no good for someone like you. You are good, kind..."

"You've got that wrong," he softly said, reaching out to her; caressing her face. "_You_ deserve better than me. _I'm_ hard-headed, hot-tempered, have this incredible knack for sticking my foot in my mouth, notorious for saying the wrong things at the wrong times. I have four older brothers who are smarter, more talented, and better looking than me and a little sister who is better at Quidditch. If either one of us have nothing to offer it's me."

"But I'm the one who tried to sell your best friend out to Voldermort. I'm the one who terrorized you and your friends for years. You have stood up to my friends and family. You have protected me. You have cared for me. I've done nothing to deserve anything you have done for me."

"Yes you did," he whispered. "You survived. I didn't do that. You did that and anything I do for you is to thank you for doing that."

"Why?" she mouthed unable to make any other sound.

"Because I think..." his voice trailed off before he leaned in and softly kissed her lips.

Pulling away, he didn't say anything but kept his hand on her face. She searched his eyes for any clue as to what he was going to say but she could see nothing she recognized.

"Come home with me for Christmas," he asked tentatively, though his eyes were pleading with her. "If you want to stay here then fine we'll stay here, but I'd like it if you would at least consider it."

"Why?" she whispered

"Because I want to spend Christmas with my family and you. I want to leave this place for a bit with you," he said very quietly, his thumb grazing her cheek before whispering, "Please do this for me. For us."

Closing her eyes, she nodded and whispered, "Okay," before reaching out and wrapping her arms around him unable to tell who was trembling as she held onto him.


	35. Sensual

**Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter nor do I make any money.**

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Prompt 35 - Sensual  
**

"Here are the Blacks, Malfoys, Lestranges, Crouchs, Yaxleys and Flints," Draco sighed, throwing a thick stack of parchment on the book that was open in front of Theo Nott who was clearly not paying attention to Malfoy's announcement. His eyes firmly planted on someone else in the room; someone who was just now being introduced to his constant pain. Rolling his eyes at Nott's chosen focus, Malfoy continued, "One of these days you will actually lust after someone who is available to you. First Pansy, now," he looked over in the direction where Nott was actually looking, "her. Well, at least this time her family isn't going to stop you."

"Yeah," Theo muttered turning back to his book now covered in parchment. "Just her head this time."

"And a bit of her heart, by the looks of it," Draco added, leaning back in his chair. "So what do you make those?"

"You know it's not that simple," Theo responded, looking carefully at each document before moving on to the next one. "And this is only a start."

"What other ones do you need? That we don't already have."

"Prewetts, Longbottoms, Bones, I doubt the Weasleys actually have one but that would be nice, McMillan, oh and most importantly – _Smith_."

"I'm working on that one."

"Not very hard as you are still sitting here bothering me."

"Fine, I'll leave you on one condition," Draco said, smirking as he stood.

"What?" Theo asked, looking up at Draco warily. He knew that tone all too well. The last time Draco used it, Theo found himself agreeing to research the familiar heir charms.

"Stop staring and thinking sensuous thoughts about her," Draco whispered knowingly.

Theo had heard enough, preventing Draco from continuing he hissed quietly, "Just because you..."

"I wasn't finished," Draco interrupted. "I was going to ask you to do something about it. Maybe she could help you with this," he said flicking the papers in Theo's hands. "As this isn't necessarily a type of charm that Flitwick would teach in his class. She may find it interesting besides it's already a challenging subject."

"Like she..."

"Would you stop whining like a little girl," Draco said angrily in hushed tones. "Pansy's parents came between the two of you years ago. Not me. So would you finally move on. She is right there. Available. No parents to come between the two of you. Stop being logical about this and shooting yourself before anything happens. Instead of staring after her, driving us all mad, would you finally grow some balls and do something about it."

"No." Theo said firmly, gathering up his papers and books as he stood. "It hurt enough to watch you take Pansy away. I'm not going to throw myself at a girl who clearly wants someone else."

"Even if he doesn't want her?"

"You were my best friend," Theo hissed. "And you made it a game. I learned my lesson from you. Not Pansy"

Draco just watched as Theo stormed off and out of the common room.

"That went well. I'm impressed. About time Theo told you how he really felt; only took him what eight years?... I, personally, never understood why that boy always preferred suffering in silence about what you did to him," Blaise's cool voice spoke from behind as he clapped his hands mockingly. "So you are what? Zero for two today by my calculation?"

"Shove it Blaise," Draco growled starting to walk away.

"Or maybe I should correct myself," Blaise's comment caused Draco to stop in his tracks before Blaise continued by saying, "I'll give you one for two, but you should really try to save that boy from himself. It won't fix what you did to him but it may be a start," he whispered before heading out after Theo.

Draco just looked at him like he had grown a horn on his head, shaking his head, he was about to follow him out the door and kick some sense into Theo if he had to when a small voice asked him, "Is everything okay?"

Turning he saw Granger's bright brown eyes looking up at him, thanking Merlin and every other deity he could think of, he sighed and honestly replied, "No," quickly trying to figure out how to make this go Theo's way, he continued, "Look I shouldn't be asking but can you go check on him. He's probably nose deep in the library and if I get near him he will probably start chucking books at me."

"Sure," she smiled; Draco noticed how sad the smile was. How much effort she was putting into it when it was clear all she wanted to do was cry. "I could stand to get out of here."

She was gone before he could even get a thank you out.

"Impressive Draco," Millie Bulstrode said from her seat on the couch.

"You better not..."

"I know Draco," she said with a laugh, her face back in the book she was reading. "We all know. It just may help your situation if you let Asteria see that side of you. You know _Smith_ has a thing for her."

"Millie," he growled.

"I'm just saying," she replied sweetly before he stalked back to his room.


	36. Family

**Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter nor do I make any money.**

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Prompt 36 - Family  
**

"Where's Ron?" Molly Weasley asked as Ginny and Harry approached her at King's Cross. She had expected Ron to be with them but even with his red hair and incredible height, he was no where to be seen on the crowded platform.

"He's behind us mum," Ginny said wrapping her arms around for a hug before continuing, "Now please don't make a scene when you see him."

"And why would I do a thing like that to him when he's around Hermione?" Molly asked, before giving Harry a hug to.

"That's just it Mrs. Weasley," Harry responded, after pulling away. "Him and Hermione aren't really together anymore."

"In fact, she decided to stay at Hogwarts for the Christmas hols this year," Ginny added.

"But he said he was bringing someone home with him?" Molly looked between the two wondering just what else she hadn't been told.

"He is..."

"It's just not Hermione..."

"Her name's Pansy..."

"She was the girl in the infirmary..."

"When he had the accident..."

"Now Mum, she's a nice girl..."

"Who's been through a lot..."

"So she is a bit clingy..."

"Mainly to Ron..."

"But he takes it in stride..."

"And he's happy..."

"So would you mind just going with it..."

"It would mean a lot to him..."

Molly shushed the two teenager when she finally saw her son stepping off the train. The small girl with pitch black hair not far behind. She studied the approaching pair carefully – noting the gentleness in the way her son looked at the girl, the innocent way in which she held the jumper, even the eyes of other students who were looking at the approaching pair.

"This may not be the best time to tell you this..."

"What Ginny?" Molly asked, her eyes never leaving her youngest boy and the young woman with him.

"She will need to sleep in the same room as him..."

"What?"

"Just go with it Mum..."

"Like we said, she's been through a lot..."

"What do you two mean?"

"Well, she was attacked and raped..."

"Ron was the one who found her and probably saved her life..."

"Then she was disowned by her family..."

"The the guy tried to get her again..."

"And Ron saved her again..."

"And her family tried to make her into a Squib..."

"And Ron got between her and her father evidently..."

"And that was just a couple of days ago..."

Molly's eyes instinctively started to water as she tried to take in everything that Ginny and Harry were telling her. As soon as her youngest son was in arm's reach she grabbed him and pulled him into a hug before turning to Pansy and to the surprise of the other three said, "I'm Molly. I'm sorry I didn't introduce myself before. Okay let's get your four home and fed. I know you all have to be starving."


	37. When

**Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter nor do I make any money.**

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Prompt 37 - When  
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"No. No. No"

"Come on Asteria, I need your help."

"I don't care what you need Draco Malfoy."

"What about Pansy? This isn't about me here. This is about her."

"What's in it for you?"

"What?"

"Did I stutter? What's in it for you?"

"Nothing Asteria. How many times do I have to tell you that?"

"You can tell me that until you are blue in the face because I still won't believe it."

"Great. This is about Pansy and you want to make it about me."

"Because it is isn't it? You haven't cared one iota about that girl since fourth year."

"I did care about her. I do care about her."

"You have a funny way of showing it Draco. First, you broke her heart. Humiliated her in front of the _entire_ Slytherin house."

"I know and I apologized to her numerous times for that."

"Then what about last year? What is your excuse for trying to throw her to the wolves then Draco?"

"No offense Asteria, I had a madman holding my family hostage and was just trying to _survive_."

"Oh poor pitiful Draco. You weren't the only one trying to survive last year but you were to wrapped up in yourself yet again to realize that you weren't the only one suffering."

"Fine Asteria what am I going to have to do to get you to go out with Smith?"

"Nothing because I won't do it."

"Bloody hell Asteria! Forget about me for two seconds. What about Pansy? Why aren't you trying to help us? Help her?"

"I'm not the one that has to make amends, I'm not the one who abandoned..."

"Yes you did Asteria. You abandoned her too. Do not play the high and mighty card with me and then conveniently forget that _you_ weren't there for her either. The worst part is that I know you and I know you worked out the logic behind your parents order of distancing yourself. At least your sister abandoned her for the same reason as the rest of us."

**Smack****.**

"I want Blaise to keep an eye on me."

"No. You are..."

**Smack**.

"Do you want me to do this or not?"

"Fine."

"Do I at least get to choose when?"

"No."

**Smack**.


	38. Serenade

**Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter nor do I make any money.**

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Prompt 38 - Serenade  
**

Hermione hadn't expected anyone to be in the eighth year common room when she entered; her humming ceasing the moment she saw that she wasn't going to spend the next fortnight alone. From what she could gather, she had heard of no other eighth year staying. All were either going home to their families or their friend's families. With her parents still in Australia and desperately in need of a break from watching Ron fall head over heels for Pansy and her likewise, Hermione had just decided to stay at Hogwarts for some time to herself; though that's not what she told her friends. She hadn't really lied, she really was going to revise for the upcoming NEWTS; she just didn't want to be honest about how badly she was still hurting months later.

Now she wasn't sure what she was supposed to do in this situation; given that she would be spending the next fortnight – basically alone – with Theo Nott.

From where she stood, she watched him drum his fingers against the table in some complicated fashion as he bent over parchments. Every so often the drumming would stop and be replaced his quill tapping as he grabbed a book. His quill stopping only long enough to scratch out whatever he was writing.

Curious, more than anything, Hermione made her way quietly over to the quiet Slytherin. Of all the Slytherins, he was the one that everyone knew the least about; though he had had everyone talking the last couple of days before the start of Christmas hols with the odd toss-up he had had with Malfoy. She herself had been so taken back at the sound of voice at all, that it produced any sound at all, that she saw it as an excuse to get out of the common room for a bit without using the library excuse one more time. However, she hadn't found him; he had seemingly disappeared on Hogwarts grounds that afternoon and evening. Only to return just before curfew, even quieter than before.

Quietly, trying not to disturb him, she took a seat in the empty chair next to him. Unfortunately, her curiosity overwhelmed her and she quietly asked, "Do you need any help?"

She watched as his head shot up. His crystal clear, pale green eyes wide in amazement as he stared at her unblinkingly; his quill dropping out of his hand with a soft whoosh. She felt her cheeks redden under the weight of his gaze while silently wishing she had left him alone.

"I'll just leave you alone," she muttered, standing back up and moving away from the table.

She was almost to the stairs when she heard him say, "I'm sorry. I didn't realize anyone else was going to be staying here for the holidays."

Turning back around, she gave him her best forgiving smile and replied, "That's okay. You weren't the only one. Good luck on..."

"I could use some help if you are still interested," he said quickly, his words taking on a staccato tone as he forced them out. "You can tell me no."

Carefully, she made her way back and responded, "So what are you working on?"

"Heir charms."

"For Pansy," she whispered, her voice falling in the same manner her heart did. She should have known that he would be working on something for her.

"Yes," he responded without a care in the world. Hermione found herself a bit taken back by his tone. There was something lingering under the casual way in which he spoke but she could have sworn he was holding much more in. "If you don't want to help, that's okay..."

"No I want to help," she said quickly, sitting in the chair she had just vacated moments ago. Before adding quietly, "It just hurts."

"I understand. So how much do you know..."

"What do you mean, you understand," she asked, trying desperately to figure out the puzzle he was presenting to her in the last few minutes.

Shaking his head, he explained, "Exactly what I said."

"But how?"

"There is a world outside this castle."

"You aren't going to tell me."

"Ten points to Gryffindor," Theo retorted quickly, grabbing a book that was on the floor by him and handing it to Hermione. "This will help you get an overview of the known charms."

Hermione sighed and took the book from him. Thumbing the pages as quietly as she could as she turned the pages, skimming the words, trying to take them in in spite of her mind being else where.

Finally she whispered, "Does the pain ever really go away?"

"No," he replied, his voice distant and sad. "You just learn to live with it."

"Do you ever think you will find someone like that again?"

"No. Do you?"

"No. And I think that's what hurts the most."


	39. Hunger

**Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter nor do I make any money.**

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Prompt 39 - Hunger  
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Maybe it was her eyes.

The colour of amber more than anything. A bright golden colour with hints of a vibrant green depending on her mood. Framed by thick black lashes. Keys to her soul: where he had seen so many emotions, so many truths and so many secrets. Eyes that could peer into his soul knowingly; that appeared to accept all the faults they had to see. The ones he had thought would never open again, once upon a nightmare. But they were now closed in a peaceful sleep as she laid tucked up against him in the bed they shared.

Then again maybe it was her freckles.

The ones that he had never seen before. Or more than likely never knew she had. The ones that littered her nose before spreading out in a light dusting on the top of her cheeks. A light brown hue that you had to look to see. The ones he ached at the moment to kiss. The ones that fed his curiosity if she had anymore on other parts of her body.

Or it could have been her nose.

The slightly upturned nose that had once reminded him of a pug but now he found irresistible. The one he placed small kisses on the tip, trying to be affectionate at first but that had given way to just wanting to hear the giggle that escaped her every time he did so.

Speaking of that giggle, maybe it was her voice.

The sultry voice so unlike Hermione's. The one that flirted with the alto range: low and naturally seductive. The one that was in such start contrast to Hermione's soprano that would only go up the scales when she felt passion about something – the one that would assault his ears. But Pansy's voice, soft and low was his natural lullaby. The one that coaxed him back to sleep after his own nightmares.

Or maybe it was her face.

The one now lit by the midnight moon. The heart-shaped face marred with a jagged scar across her face. One of a hundred that marred her beautiful alabaster skin that he knew about. The one she was ashamed of, the one that she kept hidden, the one he skimmed now gently in the moonlight – wishing that he could take it away.

Maybe it was just her.

He thought as he studied her in that moonlight. Desiring so much more from her than he knew he should ask: afraid it would scare her and cause her to runaway from him. That was the last thing he wanted, as his hand caressed her jaw because all he really wanted in this moment was to hear that she felt the same way about him as he did as her.

Aching for more. Hungering for more. Longing for more.

Wondering how long she would be his, if only he had the courage to ask.

If he only had the courage to tell how he really felt now.

How he realized he had fallen in love with her.


	40. Ragged

**Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter nor do make money.**

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040. Ragged

Silence settled around Pansy as she waited in Ron's room for him to get out of the shower before they went to sleep. This was the first time, she had been completely and utterly alone since that night she went up to the astronomy tower to think and her life changed forever.

Sadly there were times, like at this very moment, that in a twisted way she was glad it had happened. In a twisted way she was in a better place. A better place than what she would have known if she hadn't been attacked. She knew who her friends really were. More importantly, she knew exactly what her parents thought of her and how they saw her in their little world.

And then there was Ron.

Pansy had never really seen him before the accident and now wished that she had seen him earlier. In fact, she couldn't help but wonder how the last few years of her life would have been different if she had only seen him after Draco broke her heart instead of not seeing him until he refused to give up on her after the monster broke her body and almost her soul.

She paused to take a good look at the pictures on his dresser. The ones full of happy, smiling faces. Her fingers grazed over the ragged edges of his furniture. So different than her bedroom suite at her parent's hous which like everything else in the Parkinson Manor was perfect and immaculate.

Carefully she opened the worn doors to his wardobe and looked inside: her clothes tucked in there with his – she liked the way they looked there. Smiling softly, her fingers grazed each wool jumper of his that was folded there and every Canons jersey that hung in there. Her fingers came to rest on the softest one. She pulled it out and from her touch alone, she could tell not only was it probably his favorite, it was old from the ragged edges along the edges of the shirt and the sleeves. Bringing it up her face, she took in a deep breath; taking in the smell of sandalwood and cedar that was Ron. The comforting smell that she loved.

With a small laugh and a bigger smile, she placed the jersey on his other shirts and pulled up her own night shirt before slipping off her pajama pants.. Folding both of them up, she tucked them away in the wardobe before slipping on the jersey that fell almost to her knees. Rolling up the sleeves, she made her way to the bed and crawled in under the ragged quilt made from various orange squares. She buried her face into the pillow, taking in his scent again.

Smiling softly at the thought of how she loved him. She didn't have long to think about it or worry about the implications as she quickly fell asleep dreaming of him and children with red hair..

Ron's breath escaped him the moment he opened up the door to his bedroom.

There laying in his bed was the most beautiful thing in the world: Pansy wrapped up in his bed, with his quilt, in his jersey. His favorite jersey no less. Her long black hair a sharp contrast to all the orange. But what really made it so beautiful to him was the soft smile on her face as she slept peacefully by herself.

He just hoped her dreams involved him.


	41. Sleepwalk

**Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter nor do make money.**

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041. Sleepwalk  
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Theo looked up to say something to Hermione but managed to stop his voice before it emitted a sound. There sleeping with her head resting on a stack of papers, tendrils of her tight, light brown curls falling over her face. Every so often her breath would move them ever so softly.

He wasn't sure if he had seen anything more beautiful in his life. Carefully, he brushed those loose tendrils out of her face so he could look at her face properly: the cherub-like cheeks with the smattering of light freckles that dusted their apples; the dark eyelashes that curled away from her unpainted eyes; the creamy skin that wasn't that of an English rose but wasn't dark either; the bow-shaped lips – the lower one plump and pouty – sending his mind straight to the gutter.

Sighing, he leaned back in his chair and realized that Blaise really was right – he was such a masochist when it came to women; first Pansy, now Hermione. He fancied a woman who wanted to be with a guy who was with the first woman he loved. And where did that leave him? Out in the proverbial thunderstorm.

Defeated, he moved to kneel by her. His goal was to wake her up and get her to go to bed. Unfortunately, she wouldn't move; she just kept brushing him off. Sighing again, he stood up and gently manuevered her from her chair. Lifting her up into his arms, his heart stopped when she wrapped her arms around his neck, settling herself deeper into his body. She mumbled something but he couldn't make it out; though he could honestly say he didn't want to know exactly what she said – whether it was in his favor or the more likely scenario, it was not in his favor.

Unable to take her anywhere else, he gently laid her down on Draco's bed and pulled the sheets up around her. Taking a seat on the bed, he watched her sleep for as long as he dared before returning to the common room to clean up the mess they had made researching heir charms all day without much success.

Before crawling into bed, he couldn't stop himself from placing a gentle kiss on her forehead.

The sunlight streaming in woke Hermione as always but this morning was different. She wasn't alone this morning: a warm body was pressed into her back and an arm wrapped tightly around her waist.

The very thought of her not being alone in her bed caused her eyes to shoot open. The dim morning light was enough to show her a messed up bed in front of her and that she was clearly in a room for Slytherins. The last thing she remembered last night was being frustrated with what she was reading and had turned her attention to watching Theo; the way he was constantly in motion though he sat still intrigued her after spending most of her lifetime with boys who when in motion stayed in motion.

He kept dominating her thoughts the longer she spent with him. She would be kidding herself if she actually thought she minded for even a minute. The last few days with him gave her more to think about than losing Ron; it gave her the hope she would survive losing him.

His mumbled, "Go back to sleep," put a smile on her face before she closed her eyes and did just that.


	42. Glimpse

**Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter nor do make money.**

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042. Glimpse

_A/N: This piece is chronologically all over the place. All you need to know is that this happens over Christmas hols while Ron & Pansy are at the Burrow._

Arthur was surprised to come home from work to find a girl other than Hermione wrapped up in Ron's arms on the porch. He vaguely remembered seeing the same girl in the infirmary with Harry and Ginny when Ron had had his accident but he didn't remember her ever speaking or introducing herself. Arthur whacked his brain trying to remember what Ginny and Harry called her but he couldn't recall her name. But it didn't matter, the moment he watched his youngest son pull her completely into his lap; wrap his arms protectively around the smaller girl and kiss her forehead. It was at that very moment that his youngest boy was no longer a boy; he was now a man.

Percy almost asked Harry where Ron and Hermione were when he stepped through the Floo. Luckily Ginny was able to land a solid shot to his mid-section before the words came out, for moments later Ron entered the kitchen not with Hermione but a small sprite of girl with long black hair and bold hazel eyes. Eyes that were eerily familiar though he couldn't put his finger on where he had seen such an unusual shade before. He only admitted to Bill later that though he had missed Hermione as she was always eager for conversation about his favorite topics, he liked this new girl – she had manners and somehow managed to instill them finally into Ron.

Bill and Fleur had purposefully arrived early to Christmas Eve dinner for a glimpse of Ron and Pansy outside of Hogwarts; both curious as how the two would interact without the constant stress they knew had to be interfering in their lives. Arthur just grinned at the two as they hurried into the house only to stop short at the scene in the living room: Ron and Pansy in a heated game of Exploding Snap. It was only at that moment, that Bill realized he couldn't remember ever hearing her laugh before.

George tiptoed up to Ron's room, fully anticipating giving his younger brother and his best mate the wake-up they fully deserved. However, the dawning of the light revealed two things to George that stopped him in his tracks: there was no sign of Harry or the camp bed he usually slept in but there was a girl in Ron's bed. The same girl from the infirmary. The one who had had a death grip on her chair as she had sat by Ron's bed when he had taken that fall. The one with those glowing hazel eyes that he remembered from his first year at Hogwarts.

Charlie stumbled into the living room way past midnight on Christmas day – tired and hungry, having only barely been able to escape the reserve for a couple of days at this time of the year. The sight of his youngest brother curled up with a girl with black hair on the sofa taking him by surprise in more ways than one. He could have sworn that Ron was dating a girl name Hermione; one with light brown hair. However, he figured he would find out more in the morning.

Unfortunately, Charlie wasn't paying attention to where he was going and accidentally tripped over a side table trying to get to the stairs. The girl's eyes shot open as she sat up and he found his eyes locked with glowing hazel eyes. The same ones he thought he would never see again. Actually, the same ones he had prayed about; the ones he would never see again.

"Charlie?" she whispered, her voice strangled.

"Oh gods," was all he could get out.


	43. Questions

**Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter nor do make money.**

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**043. Questions**

"So all pureblood families have some sort of heir charm?"

"Most do," Theo replied, not looking up from a book he was reading on bonding charms. "There are a few families who we know have them but Draco hadn't gotten his hands on those yet. We also aren't entirely sure about the Weasleys – even though they seem to be more fertile than the rest of the purebloods, no one has ever heard of them actually using one in centuries."

"Then why is Pansy an only child?"

Theo sighed looking up from book, not entirely wanting to answer the question as it would bring up something that several families, including his and Draco's, had gone to great lengths to bury. Carefully he answered, "She is now."

"So she had a brother?"

"Yes, two in fact. The Parkinson's charm is unusual as it always produces twins."

Hermione scrunched up her face as Theo knew she did every time she thought really hard before asking her inevitable question – "What happened to them?"

"They died."

"I gathered that Theo," Hermione huffed exasperated. "You know it's really frustrating to have a conversation with you when you don't want to talk about something."

"Then why don't we drop it?"

"Why won't you talk about it?"

"It happened almost nine years ago. There are times you really should let the past die," Theo retorted, going back to the book on the binding charms.

"And there are times, you shouldn't keep everything in," she snapped back. "I'm going to the kitchens. Do you want anything?"

"No but..." his voice trailed off as something caught his eye.

"Theo." He heard her voice in the distant but didn't answer as he tried to process what he just read and if and how it could help Pansy.

"Theo." Her voice was closer now but he didn't respond, his fingers quickly flipping through another book he had grabbed.

"Theo." Hermione said firmly grabbing the book from him. "What is it?"

Theo looked up at Hermione and whispered, "You wouldn't happen to know if the Weasleys use a familiar marriage binding charm?"

Hermione's heart sunk at the question, gathering what little bravery she had, she whispered, "I seem to remember something about one but they don't use it."

"Why?"

"I don't know," Hermione replied, sadly sitting back down in her chair. "Fleur wanted to use it when she and Bill got married and there was a huge row. Ron's father never yells and animated doesn't quite do what I witnessed justice."

"Did they use it?"

"No," Hermione said with a shake of her head. "They just used a regular marriage bind. Why?"

"According to this," he said gently, knowing this wasn't going to get any easier on Hermione anytime soon, "the marriage binds of the oldest families are strong enough to alter the progression of several charms – including the heir charms."

"And the Weasleys are as old as they come," Hermione whispered.

"Them and the Malfoys are the only ones with male heirs in existence of the ones they mentioned."

Theo watched as Hermione shrunk into her chair, wringing her hands. He had nine years to wait for this moment, he couldn't imagine what he would have felt like if he had been in her shoes.

"You still love her," was all she whispered. "After all these years. You still love her."

"Yes," he whispered back. "I'm about as big of a fool as they come."

"Well that makes two of us. I guess Malfoy will want to hear this?"

"Yes."

"We are just going to have to stand by and let this happen aren't we? Whether we want to or not?"

"I just don't know if we are going to find another way. And I know I just can't stand by and let that bastard ruin her life anymore. I know you don't want to hear this but he really makes her happy besides being the best thing that has ever happened to her – there are times I can now see the girl I fell in love with when she's with him."

"Don't worry, I would never be able to live with myself if I stood in the way.

The sound of the fire cracking overtook the room as Hermione stared at her hands and Theo stared at the ceiling each wallowing in their own misery at knowing what the right thing to do was but not liking it all the same.


	44. Fringe

**Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter nor do make money.**

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****044. Fringe**

"Does he know?"

"No. Your parents don't know do they?" Pansy whispered, brushing her fringe out of her face, as Charlie sat down beside her. Together they watched as Harry, Ginny, Ron, Percy, George, Bill, and Gabrielle played _something_. Pansy had stopped trying to figure out what it was a full five minutes ago.

"Nah," he replied, handing her a mug of hot chocolate.

"Why not?" Pansy asked as she took the mug from him.

"Wasn't really anything to say in the end. What was done was done."

"What about your siblings?"

"Gods no. They would never let me go back to the dragon reserve if they knew what really happened my seventh year to Finny. Tonks knew and she fought me like a tiger when I left – so afraid of me doing something stupid just to get back to him," Charlie said with a hollow laugh. "Bill asks from time to time about Finny. He just never seems to ask the right questions. So he never gets the right answers."

"Why don't you tell them?You were the victim."

"No I wasn't," Charlie sighed. "Finny and I knew what we were getting into by telling Callum. We knew the consequences of our actions and we still did it. There was only one victim that night and it wasn't any of us."

"But..."

"No buts Pansy. I am not now, nor was I ever the reason the whole mess got swept up under the mat. You are the only other person living that even knew I was there that night."

"I know," she whispered. "Fat load of good it did anybody."

"Your parents were never known to be good people, I wouldn't take it too hard."

"I know, doesn't mean it hurts any less."

"Do you still think about that night?" Charlie asked. "About Finny that is?"

Pansy turned her head to look at Charlie with a guilty expression and whispered, "Not until I saw you again. I'm sorry you have to hear that, I know what he meant to you."

"Don't be,"Charlie replied, patting her leg. "I always figured they _obliviated_ you that night."

"I wished they had for a long time before I just started to block it and Finny out of my memories."

"What about now?"

"And now I'm working really hard on forgiving myself," she said with a sad smile as she watched Ron tackle Bill into a snow drift. "I find myself wishing Finny was here. I think he would like Ron but then again I imagine you miss him too."

"Sure do. Never really got over it. Don't think I ever will – at least I don't have plans too."

"Why not?"

"Don't want to," Charlie said with a sad smile. "There is no replacing Finny."

Charlie wrapped his arm around her and placed a kiss on her forehead before whispering, "You love him don't you?"

"Can this stay between us?" Pansy asked turning her head to look at Charlie.

"Sure thing."

"I do," she whispered. "Very much. I haven't told him because I'm afraid he's picking me for all the wrong reasons."

"Why is that?"

"Have you not noticed your brother has this knight-in-shining-armour kick?"

"True but what if I told you I think he feels the same way."

"But is it for the right..."

"Oi, you two!" George yelled interrupting Pansy, with a flailing Gabrielle over his shoulders. "Stop gossiping and get your arses over here!"


	45. Diamond

**Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter nor do make money.**

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**045. Diamond**

_A/N: Diamond comes from ancient Greek word ''adámas'. One of the ways it is translated is 'unalterable'. That is how I came up with the following._

"Look, we know it's not the best solution but it's the only one we've come up with," Theo said to the crowded kitchen table at the Burrow.

When Theo, Hermione and Draco had showed up at the Burrow only moments before, they had asked to speak to Pansy and Ron by themselves but Harry and Ginny refused to be excluded; claiming they were just as involved as any of them.

"So what is it?" Ron asked, tentatively as he tried to reassure Pansy by squeezing her hand underneath the table. The ominous look on Hermione's face sent chills down his spine.

For several minutes everyone just stared at each other: one side eager to hear the idea, the other still unsure if what they were about to do the right thing.

Finally, Hermione broke the silence with a quiet, "What do you know about your family's marriage binding charm?"

Ron and Ginny stared at her slack-jawed.

Until Ron finally found the words laced with surprise and astonishment – "You can't be serious Hermione."

"Don't you remember what happened when Bill and Fleur got married?"

"Mum's reaction."

"Dad's reaction," Ginny responded, her face still incredulous at the question Hermione had asked.

"What about it?" Pansy asked softly, stopping Ron and Ginny's protests from going any further.

Theo softly spoke, "We found proof that some of the oldest Wizarding family's marriage binding charms can alter the heir charm. There are only two families still in existence that qualify: the Weasley's and the Malfoy's."

Pansy dropped Ron's hand at the underlying implications of Theo's statement. Her hand didn't stay empty long as Ron grabbed it again and pulled it into his lap as he threaded his fingers through hers, before asking, "What will it do to the heir charm?"

"That we don't know Ron," Hermione whispered. "We are still trying to get our hands on the one we think he used but the charm's reaction to the binding is unique to the couple involved."

"So even if we go through with this, there is still a chance he can..." Pansy whispered, unable to finish the sentence.

"Honestly," Theo started, "I don't think so. The family that created what we think is the heir charm you were hit with has never been known for having the strongest of familiar charms. I think the combination of a potentially very weak heir charm with a very strong marriage bind may be just enough to prevent him from fulfilling the charm as it was intended."

Pansy nodded before turning to Draco and asking, "What do you think?"

"I'm with them Pansy," he responded pointing to Theo and Hermione. "I think this is the best option we have. I'm not sure if something better will come around because regardless if this charm is weak or not; they are unbreakable."

"Irreversible," Hermione corrected earning her a scowl from Draco.

"And you deserve to have a life and not be constantly looking over your shoulder," Theo added. "You have the right to a life."

"Theo," Pansy whispered, reaching across the table to his hands with her free hand.

"I know," he whispered back. "Please just consider this; I think this can work to your advantage."

"Theo..."

"Please," Theo whispered.

Pansy nodded her head and withdrew her hand.

"You three are leaving something out. What is it?" Ron asked, looking at Pansy. "What are you three dancing around?"

"Nothing ominous," Pansy softly responded. "Theo, Draco, and I, we grew up together. And though we haven't always been the best of friends to one another; we do really know the other – just like you and Hermione and Harry."

Pansy sat there silently looking at Ron under his intense glare. Trying desperately to withstand the pressure she found herself under.

After an eternity, Ron sighed and stood up. "I would stay here in the kitchen. You should be safe from the fallout."

Confused, Pansy jumped out of her chair, chasing after him as she asked, "Why? What's going on?"

"I'm going to go talk to my parents."

Time stood still as Pansy just stared at where Ron had been. She didn't know how long she stood there before she taking off after him. She managed to grab him on the second flight of stairs as he had been delayed by Charlie. Thanking her lucky stars that she wouldn't have to track down Charlie later, she pulled Ron into Ginny's bedroom with Charlie where she closed and sealed the door.

"There _is _something you need to know. If you are serious about this."

Ron looked between Pansy and Charlie obviously confused as to his current situation before asking, "Why is Charlie here?"

"I'm sorry but I'm telling him," she said not to Ron but to Charlie who only sighed and nodded before taking a seat on the bed.


	46. Passing

**Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter nor do make money.**

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**046. Passing

"I'm sorry but I'm telling him."

"Telling me what?" Ron asked, his eyes passing from Pansy to Charlie and back again; trying to figure out why she looked so desperate and Charlie looked so defeated. And how the hell they would share a secret when they only just met? With a dawning realization, he growled, "_Again_? You have withheld something important from me again? When are you just going to trust me? What do I have to do to get you to trust me? Please tell me."

"This isn't about you, you know," Charlie snapped, stopping Ron from continuing on his rant. Ron just stared at his brother. Of all of them Charlie had always been the laid-back one, the one who never got mad – well, except maybe at Bill from time to time – but Ron couldn't remember Charlie _ever_ snapping at him.

"Then what am I missing?" Ron's frustration was mounting. "Draco and Theo know about this too don't they?"

"Yes and no," Pansy whispered. "I think Theo knows more than Draco but we don't talk about it; so I don't know what their fathers' told them."

"Okay, why would Theo know?"

"Besides being my childhood sweetheart, I was betrothed to him."

"What changed?"

"I killed my brother."

Ron just stared at Pansy not sure if she really said what he thought he heard her say.

After a few minutes, he decided he heard wrong and asked, "What about Draco?"

"Afterwards, the contract was dissolved and I was betrothed to Draco."

"After what?"

Pansy just looked at him dumbfounded while saying, "After I killed my brother Ron."

"You had a brother?"

"I had two actually."

"And exactly how do you come into this?" Ron turned his attention to his brother.

"Because I was there the night she killed her brother. She killed him to save me about nine years ago. She's Finny Parkinson's little sister."

Ron deflated at this announcement, his eyes moving from Pansy to Charlie and back again. His hands running through his hair, over and over; sometimes stopping to grab it and slightly yank. His feet started to move as he began to pace from one side of the room to the other. His body in overdrive to compensate for the emptiness of his mind; trying to take in just exactly what his brother and his girlfriend just told him.

"Ron," Pansy started quietly. "Please understand my brother Callum wasn't a nice person. My parents were probably the only people in this world who actually liked him; Theo's family were the only ones brave enough to even enter into a marriage contract with me given Callum's behavior. But after he died..."

"You were suddenly good enough for Malfoy," Ron interrupted still pacing.

"No. I only became good enough because of how I killed him," she whispered as Ron came to a stop.

"What?"

"She doesn't need a wand Ron," Charlie said, watching his brother start his pacing again. "Even the unforgivables. She cast the killing curse that night without a wand."

"Why didn't you tell me? Why?"

"I didn't think about it because I don't think about it," Pansy pleaded trying to get him to stop. "I've spent the entire time you have known me blocking out the memory of what I witnessed and did that night. No one wants to remember that they killed their brother or watched him kill one person and try to kill another.

"Downstairs when you thought something was being said – that was it. Theo and Draco know what I can really do. I think they believe that the combination of the marriage bind and my magic will control the outcome of the heir charm saying it's probably the reason I'm still alive to begin with."

"Heir charm?" Charlie perked up. "What don't I know?"

"Later," Ron said gruffly, looking at Pansy who had her hands gripped in his shirt, holding him in place as she silently continued to plead with him.

"Look you don't have to do this. I won't think any less of you," she whispered. "Please don't do this to 'save me'. You've already done enough. More than enough in fact."

"What do you want me to do?" he asked, his voice rough and the hurt he felt at that moment. Hearing her say he had done enough when he knew he hadn't – that there was so much more he wanted to do for her. Especially when he knew that he hadn't saved her, she had saved herself; no matter what she thought.

"I only want you to do this, if you want it."

"And what do you want from me?"

Ron watched as her lips started to quiver as she slowly lost control in front of him. Guilt started to rise up in him at the same rate as the tears formed in her eyes. His hand was about to go to her face and wipe away a tear that had fallen when she stepped away.

When she was out of his reach, she whispered, "I want you to do what makes you happy. I just want you happy," before turning and running out the door.

Ron stood frozen in Ginny's room, looking at the empty doorway; hearing her feet on the stairs going down. He heard her name being called out by someone not him and that made him hurt even more. He wasn't the one that she was suppose to run away from; he was the one she was suppose to run to.

He didn't even notice that Charlie had come to stand by him until he said, "I figure that since she broke her promise to me, I can break my promise to her."

Ron turned to look at his brother puzzled before Charlie started to push him out the door, saying, "Go after her you fool. She loves you."

"Only because..."

"See I've got a bit of insider knowledge on her having been in love with her brother. She's just like him in many ways and believe me when I say she is absolutely, positively, in love with you and if you don't get down there and fix this right now – you will lose her to Theo who has loved her his entire life."

"But he abandoned her when she needed him. They all did."

"Don't you think they've learned their lessons?" Charlie replied, pushing Ron out the door.

"You really think she loves me?" Ron asked quietly, looking down the stairs but not moving in that direction.

"Yes Ron, trust me she loves you," Charlie replied, exasperated. "Go after her and make this right. Tell her you want her; tell her that you love her."

"Can you go and check on her I'll be right back," Ron said, taking off in the opposite direction of where Pansy had disappeared to..

"Ron." Charlie called out after his brother who was disappearing into his parents' bedroom. "Ron. Ron! Ron!"


	47. Flame

**Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter nor do make money.**

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**047. Flame

"Ron," his mum asked so startled by his entrance, she slipped a stitch in her knitting. "I thought you were downstairs with everyone else."

However, it wasn't long before she started looking at him with concern before gently asking, "Is everything okay?"

"Um," he said slowly trying to control his thudding heart at the moment. "I need to talk to you and dad about something important and you aren't going to like it."

"Okay. So what aren't we going to like?" his father asked, looking up from the Muggle magazine on automobiles.

"I would like my set of bands," Ron replied quietly, his courage suddenly failing him.

His mother just stared at him while the magazine fell from his father's hands as he furiously whispered, "Excuse me?"

Taking a deep breath, Ron repeated, "I would like my set of bands please," louder and firmer; trying to hide the shaking his insides were doing at the moment.

This time his mother completely dropped her knitting as Arthur lept to his feet and approached his son furious. He was face to face with Ron before growling in his face, "I'm going to pretend you didn't ask me that because I know you aren't daft enough to ask me for those after your brother asked."

"You can pretend all you want, Dad, but I'm still standing here asking you for the bands," Ron replied, not completely sure why the sudden surge of defiance was grounding his courage.

"Fine, so explain to me why if I refused Bill his bands, why would I allow you?"

"Please know that if it wasn't important, I wouldn't be asking you. _But _I'm not asking for me Dad."

Ron watched his father start to say something but stopped mid-word. His father's whole demeanor changed from anger to confusion, before he tentatively asked, "Then why are you asking? You know those bands only work for Weasley males."

"I know."

"Then why?"

Taking a deep breath, Ron explained, "It's for Pansy. After she was attacked last time, the ba—her attacker hit her with an heir charm. According to research Hermione has helped with, there is reason to believe that the Weasley marriage bind could alter it enough to protect her. Dad you have to understand that I refuse to stand by and watch whoever attacked her force her to carry his child."

His father took a seat on the end of the bed defeated, not looking at Ron or his wife. Ron could tell he was fighting an internal battle between what he wanted to do and what he knew he had to do. He could only hope that his father would side with him and Pansy on whatever side the marriage bind fell on.

"Arthur," his mother whispered after several minutes had passed. "You need to give them to him. You know how damaging these charms are, you just can't condemn her to it or make Ron watch it. No matter what you promised. _Our_ family needs to come first here."

But his father didn't respond, he kept looking at his hands, twirling his wedding band.

After what seemed like another eternity, his father finally spoke, "Did we ever explain to you and your brothers why we don't use the bind anymore?"

"No," Ron sighed painfully, his hope and belief that his father would give him the bands faded with every passing second after hearing the weariness in his father's voice.

"Several generations ago, a Malfoy was scheduled to marry one of your grandfathers. Like most Malfoys, her father did not approve for many reasons but the strongest one being was that we Weasleys have always valued our daughters; as they had always been a special part of our world since before even the founders of Hogwarts. Well, during their binding ceremony, the Malfoy heir charm was cast at the same time as the marriage bind, effectively altering the bind. It had been five hundred years since that fateful day. Five hundred years passed between births of daughters. All this time, we sons have refused to use the bind in the hopes of returning daughters to our lines. To return our daughters to our world."

"What about Ginny?"

"When my father was very young, a well-known and well-respected seer took upon him in the street and told him that the longed for daughter would return when she sacrifices her own blood for her chosen blood. Till this day no one has ever made any sense of it because when Ginny was born we thought she was it but the prophesy never seemed to apply to her. The only explanation we have ever come up with is that she is the seventh child of a seventh son of a seventh son," his father said before falling quiet again. "So you see, if I give you the bands to protect one, to protect someone not of our blood, then I risk condemning the Weasley family and our world to more generations passing without daughters; and it's just not our branch, it's all of us."

"I'm sorry son but I can't do that."

Ron nodded, his eyes fixed on his father, as the last flickering flame of hope faded into extinction.


	48. Happiness

**Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter nor do make money.**

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048. ****Happiness**

"Where's Pansy?" Charlie asked stepping out to the back porch where the teenagers had gathered.

"Out by the lake," Harry replied seconds before Theo added, "Good luck. She's blocking us from approaching her."

"You too?" Charlie asked confused.

"Me too," Theo nodded. "You can give it a shot yourself but be prepared to be thrown onto your arse by Callum's blocking charm."

"Lovely. Still can't get away from that arse and he's been dead for nine years," Charlie muttered before heading off in the direction that Harry had pointed to earlier. It took him a few minutes to get moving because he had to shrug off Harry, Hermione and Ginny who wanted to know how Theo and Charlie knew each other. Pansy was more important to him at the moment then annoying questions from people who didn't need certain answers.

Charlie slowed his pace as drew closer to where she was sitting on the dock: her feet dangling off the side, inches from the ice that covered the lake. Anticipating Callum's nasty blocking charm to knock him off his feet at any second, he patiently waited as close as he dared to her but it never came. Calling out to the solitary figure swinging her feet, he tentatively asked, "Can I join you?"

Pansy didn't say anything in response, instead she just patted the empty spot next to her. Carefully he took his first step onto the dock and braced himself for the shock but it never came.

"I don't blame you for not trusting me."

"It's not that I don't trust you..."

"It's that you still remember that blocking charm of his when he wanted to be left alone."

"And obviously you do to," Charlie replied moving closer to Pansy, feeling more confident that he wasn't going to be thrown anywhere anytime soon.

"Except when it matters evidently," she replied quietly.

"What do you mean?"

"I can do this," she said waving her hand over her head. "But I can't seem to protect myself when I needed it the most."

"I imagine you did the best you could at that moment," he countered, finally reaching her and taking a seat. "I suspect your mind just shut down wishing for the end to come as soon as possible; zapping any hope of you even doing accidental magic."

The pair fell silent as they stared out over the lake both lost in their own thoughts.

"You know he loves you," Charlie whispered, taking her cold hand as his eyes looked straight ahead. "Granted that wouldn't take an unspeakable to figure that one out."

"I know," she whispered, causing Charlie to spin his head to stare at her. He figured that she would be just as clueless about how Ron felt about her as he had been about how she felt about him. "I just don't know why he does because Merlin knows I'm not good enough for him given everything."

"But you are good enough for him especially if you are the same girl I remember tagging behind Finny every chance you got."

"I hadn't been her in a long time."

"Then why do I see her now?"

Pansy just stared at him.

Charlie laughed at her reaction, tweaking her nose like he used to a lifetime ago he continued, "It's that little girl that makes him happy because I think you may be one of the few people to look at him and only see him – not the war hero or yet another Weasley or Harry Potter's mate..."

"And you happen to be the first person I want to see in the morning and the last person I want to talk to at nigh," Ron's voice came from behind. "No matter what happens."

Charlie watched as the little girl sitting beside him scrambled to her feet with tears in her eyes before throwing herself into his little brother's waiting arms. He found himself blinking back the tears as he watched him wrapped her up in his arms; holding her smaller body tight against his as they both cried, words being mumbled between the two that Charlie couldn't quite make out. Looking at the couple, Charlie wondered just when little Ronnie had become a man.

Climbing slowly to his feet, Charlie walked away as the couple clung to each other in desperation and hope that the other would be enough.


	49. Fleeting

**Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter nor do make money.**

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**049. Fleeting

"And you happen to be the first person I want to see in the morning and the last person I want to talk to at nigh," Ron's voice came from behind, where she sat with Charlie. "No matter what happens."

So thankful to hear his voice, that she scrambled to her feet. Tears began to fall down her face in joy, hoping this meant he was choosing her for the right reasons not his stupid noble ones – the biggest one being the simple fact that he may love her even half as much as she loved him. Seeing his arms open, welcoming her home, she threw herself into him – wrapping her arms around his neck, her legs around his waist as he wrapped his arms around her.

"Please tell me you are choosing me for the right reasons," she pleaded, her head buried into his neck. She knew she shouldn't ask but she just had to know. "I can't bear to know you are choosing me out of a sense of duty. I need more than that."

"Then how about I'm choosing you because I love you. You are my world," he whispered back, sending even more tears rolling down her face. Feeling his tears too, she whispered into his ear that she loved him too. That he was her everything.

His arms wrapped around her tighter as he rocked them back and forth. Realizing that there was something else going on that he hadn't told her, she pulled her head back and looked at him carefully, seeing the sadness in his eyes, she asked, "What's the matter?" as she wiped away the stray tears on his own face.

"My father won't part with the bands therefore no Weasley marriage bind."

Her fading tears renewed their pathways as they ebbed from joy to sadness as his words soaked into her mind. Quietly, she asked, "What are we going to do?"

"I don't know," he whispered back, as she tucked her head back into the crook of his arm. "I don't know."

"Ron..."

"Yes?" he whispered moving back towards the house, Pansy still wrapped around his body and in his arms.

"Can we go lie down in your room? I don't want to be around anyone else at the moment."

"Neither do I," he replied, kissing her head gently before continuing up to the Burrow.


	50. Years

**Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter nor do make money.**

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**050. Years

Arthur felt himself age fifty years as his son retreated from the bedroom. Going over to the window, he saw Charlie sitting with Pansy on the edge of the dock with the others a good distance from them.

"I did the right thing didn't I?" he softly asked Molly as her footfalls came nearer. His father had always warned him that denying his own children the bonds would be hard especially if they truly needed the magic the bind provided. He just never figured it would be this hard – or it would be his youngest son asking; the one who had seen too much before he was an adult, the one he wanted to protect and shelter the most.

"As long as you believe you did the right thing, then its the right thing," she whispered wrapping her arms around him. "You know as well as I do that not everything is black and white."

"I know but I hate how I feel at the moment," he continued, watching Charlie wrap his arm around the sprite of a girl who meant so much to his youngest. "I feel like I am letting him down. The one who has never asked for anything but more than willing to sacrifice himself."

"Why? You refused Bill the bands too. What makes this any different?"

"Bill's reasons were easy to say no too, they were the same reasons my own father told me no when I asked. But Ron wasn't up here asking for him, or for the family, or for the simple fact of starting to use the familiar marriage bind as per tradition but Ron was asking for her; for a way to protect her from something that could and probably will tear the two of them apart."

Sighing, Arthur felt the tears start to slide down his face as he watched his youngest get sidetracked by the group of teenagers, "The way they look at each other, there is no doubt how they feel but to know she has an heir charm on her – knowing that it could prevent them from maintaining this happiness they have chosen for one another. It's suddenly not so black and white anymore, it's more...Look."

Arthur pulled Molly to the side just in time for the two of them to watch as Pansy ran into Ron's open arms. Turning his head to the side, he kissed his darling wife of over thirty years and whispered, "I have to do the wrong thing. I can't stand by and sacrifice his happiness."

Arthur went to the loose floor board underneath their marital bed and removed it. Pulling at the box that had Ron's name on it, he gripped it in his hand as he replaced the board. Standing up, he just stared at the box in his hand and muttered, "I guess we finally proved Cassandra Trewlaney wrong. There won't be another guardian anytime soon."

"You don't know that Arthur," Molly whispered. "No one is even certain that the absence of guardians and females in the Weasley family is due to that Malfoy casting an heir charm during the marriage bind. It's just given you two just another reason to hate each other. Have a little faith that Ginny is the future for the Weasley's."

"Five hundred years, Molly," Arthur whispered. "For an attempt to save our son's happiness, I'm going to cost the family another five hundred years without daughters; our world without guardians."


	51. Thunder

**Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter nor do make money.**

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**051. Thunder

Charlie dragged his feet as he made his way back to the group of teenagers huddled together. He just couldn't understand why Pansy's life just couldn't go easy for her: a childhood of being sheltered behind Finny; then to see what she had to see, do what she had to do that night; to survive a war as a child; and then to be raped and beaten within an inch of her life. And right now he couldn't stop kicking himself for running to Romania after Finny's death when he should have stayed and taken responsibility for her, for Finny.

Looking up as he neared the group, he saw tears frozen on their faces. His heart plummetted, quietly he asked, "What happened?"

"Ron went to ask your father for the Weasley marriage bind."

"What?" Charlie asked shell-shocked. Looking back at the couple still embraced on the dock; Ron stroking her back while she was wrapped around his body and in his arms. "Why would Ron do that? There is no way he'd ever say yes."

"Pansy was hit with an heir charm by her attacker a month or so ago," Theo replied, the only one who dared to look Charlie in the eyes. The rest hung their heads and murmured their agreement. "There's a possibility that the Weasley family marriage bind will alter it enough not to affect them."

"Does Dad know this?" Charlie asked, he felt his temperature start to rise. When he got no answer, he asked again firmer, "Does he?"

"I assume, he told him," Harry replied. "Especially given how your father reacted, when Bill asked for his bands, just because."

"Stay out of the house until I get back," Charlie growled taking off running for the house. Once he was inside, he yelled, "Dad! Where are you?"

Running up the stairs, thundering like a hippogriff, Charlie yelled again, "Dad!"

"What is it?" Arthur yelled back coming out of his room.

"How could you? How could you do this to them? To Ron?"

"Do what?"

"Deny him the bands if it could save her, if it could protect her. You have five sons because of her! The least you can do is give them, give her a chance at a normal life," Charlie yelled, finally close enough to his father to stand eye to eye.

"What do you mean I have five sons because of her?"

"Did you really think Callum and Finny Parkinson's death was as clean as _The Daily Prophet_ reported it? Callum butchered Finny and was about to start on me when Pansy stopped him. Pansy killed him. Pansy..."

"No. No. No. NO!" Arthur was yelling by the end as he took off down the stairs still alternating between yelling no and muttering it.

Charlie turned to his mother and found her looking at him as confused as he found himself before they took off after Arthur.


	52. Taboo

**Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter nor do make money.**

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052. Taboo

"Show me your hands!"

The sound of his father yelling caused Ron to almost drop Pansy; being so unfamiliar with the sound that shattered the quietness that surrounded them. At the last moment, he was able to catch her and set her down on her feet. As soon as she was safely on her feet, Ron tugged her into his body, wrapping his arm around her protectively.

"I'm not asking again. Show me your hands!"

"What's going on?" Ron asked, trying to figure out what exactly had set his father off. And more importantly why their hands all of a sudden mattered.

"I want to see your hands," he yelled, grabbing for Pansy. Ron instinctively hit his father trying to protect Pansy before pulling her back behind her and pinning her with his arm. By now, the three of them were surrounded with people as Arthur collected himself.

Ron growled, "What is so damn important about her hands?"

"Let me see them," Arthur ordered again. Ron could feel Pansy start to move and tried to fight her silently about it but in the end she won. As stepped from behind Ron, he watched as she slowly put her hands out for Arthur to see. He studied them for a moment before he raised his wand and said, "_Finite Incantum."_

Those who had never seen Pansy's scars, watched as the ones on her face, neck and hands appeared; as her eyes started to water and her cheeks turn pink in embarrassment. Ron watched as Hermione and Molly's hands went flying to their mouth; while Theo walked away; and Draco and Charlie just stood where they were staring at the scars horrified.

"What are you looking for?" Ron asked aggravated, not entirely sure what Pansy had done that was so bad that it deserved this kind of public embarrassment, pulling her back closer to his body but she resisted, instead choosing to stand by Ron with her hands outstretched..

"Remove it." Arthur said softly, his eyes glued to Pansy's hands, as tears started to leak out of her golden, hazel eyes which she closed.

Markings started to appear on her hands in front of everyone: the henna-colour symbols that she had hidden her all her life. Arthur took another step closer and gently touched her hands; focusing on her right one, the symbols and lines ran up her right ring finger wrapping around it.

"Let me see your hands," Arthur said turning to Ron. Looking between his father and Pansy confused, he did as he was told and to his surprise saw a henna-coloured band around his right ring finger.

Quietly, Arthur sighed, "The Weasley marriage bind won't help you now."

"What?" came the collective outcry.

Arthur just looked at Pansy and asked, "House-elf magic?"

Pansy nodded.

"How long?"

"How long what sir?"

"How long have you had them?"

"As long as I can remember. My nanny told me I shouldn't show them to anyone until a Weasley asked. That it was safer this way."

"Do your parents know?"

"Not that I know of. Do you know what they mean?"

Arthur nodded but said, "I need to go get your bands to complete the bind, you two have already done."

"We did what?" Pansy and Ron asked the same time the others said, "They did what?"

"You two binded yourselves together at some point. I doubt the heir charm is a factor with this kind of magic."

"What kind of magic?"

"Guardian." Arthur whispered..

"But there hasn't been a Guardian in over five hundred years," Hermione whispered.

"And there has never been one who wasn't a Weasley by birth," Molly added sadly.


	53. Look

**Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter nor do make money.**

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**053. Look

"Mr. Weasley." Pansy called out, chasing after the retreating figure as she pushed through the crowd still standing stock still at his pronouncement. "Please Mr. Weasley. Wait."

She silently offered her thanks as she watched him stop in front of her before turning to face her. Catching up with him, she breathlessly asked holding out her hands, "Please Mr. Weasley, what do they mean?"

"Unfortunately, I can't tell you any specifics as I don't know them myself but the shear existence of them signifies that you are a Guardian."

"I don't understand what that means, sir – a Guardian."

Sighing while wiping his forehead in defeat, Mr Weasley continued, "Simply it means that you are a very powerful witch as there does not exist a type of magic you are unable to do; the most consequential being that you can do Guardian magic – the magic of innate protection; influenced greatly by subconscious and desire. A very dangerous type of magic in the wrong hands."

"It's probably the reason your nanny insisted you hide your markings from everyone including your parents. I don't think it's a stretch for even you to understand how much danger you could have been in during the last war or even the one before then especially since there hasn't been one in five hundred years."

"So," Pansy drawled carefully trying to figure out exactly what Mr. Weasley was telling her, "With Guardian magic, if I want something it can come to pass."

"Basically. Mainly it's known uses were for the protection of their families. Guardians were heavily desired as wives when they were more prevalent because they could ensure the family's survivability. But as you have figured out, it doesn't mean that there won't be suffering before reaching the end goal."

"The night I was attacked," Pansy whispered, her eyes focused on the rune-like symbols on her hands buried within intricate lines and curves. "The first time in the astronomy tower, I kept thinking about how I wanted a different life. A life where I knew I could trust my friends. A life where I could know love and be loved in return. A life with a bit more of Finny and less of Callum."

"And what do you have now?"

"Exactly what I wanted," she whispered, a tear falling from her eye. "That's why I couldn't protect myself that night. I kept trying to throw spells, hexes, curses at my attacker but nothing would work."

"But why you were able to save yourself," Mr. Weasley added.

"What do I do now?" she whispered, looking up at him; silently pleading with him to tell her what to do because she felt so small and lost at the moment.

"That is up to you." Mr. Weasley said gently while looking over her shoulder.

Turning around to see what he was looking at, she saw Ron coming towards her. Tears she couldn't stop started to roll down her face in shear panic that this information was going to change everything.


	54. Music

**Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter nor do make money.**

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**054. Music

"You know I had half a thought to punish Mopsy for lying to me because I was certain there was no way you would be here requesting an audience," Lucius drawled standing up from behind his desk as Arthur Weasley entered his library.

"Actually there is only one reason I would be requesting an 'audience' with Lucius," Arthur retorted with a hollow laugh. "So can I have the bands and..."

Lucius dropped the glass he was holding when Arthur's request registered in his ears. Narrowing his eyes, he coolly asked, "Excuse me?"

"I know, unbelievable isn't it. So can I have the bands?"

"But those are only for the next Guardian and I thought we all agreed that Ginny wasn't one."

"And I'm asking for a Guardian and you're right Ginny isn't one," Arthur sighed, taking a seat.

Lucius just looked at the man who impetuously took a seat on a couch without his permission. His mind couldn't stop turning over and over in his head that Arthur Weasley was asking for the bands for a Guardian. How the hell had a Guardian been born without his knowledge?

Lucius was in the midst of deciding what question he wanted to ask Arthur first when Arthur's voice broke his thoughts, "Look Lucius, dragging your feet isn't going to stop this. They've already done a Guardian binding – the rings will only make it official in our world."

"Then it can be stopped." Lucius fumed. There had been a deal since the Guardians disappeared from the Weasley line that the next one born would be betrothed to the Malfoy heir in return for the Malfoy protection of the rings.

Arthur shook his head before responding, "You never listen when it's something you don't want to hear, do you Lucius? Because I think I just told you they have already done a Guardian binding unknowingly. You know there is nothing any of us can do to break that."

"Oh I think I could find a way."

"Would you just stop being stubborn Lucius and face the music, it's a done deal. Just give me the rings and I will get out of your hair."

"Just how did a Guardian get born outside of the Weasley line?"

"You're guess is as good as mine. The only thing I can tell you is that when my father was a small boy he was accosted in the street by Cassandra Trewlawney who told him that 'the longed for daughter would return when she sacrifices her own blood for her chosen blood' and that's what happened."

"I'm not following Weasley," Lucius snarled, his temper really starting to seethe.

"How much do you know about the night Callum and Finny Parkinson died?"

"What does..."

"Just answer the question Lucius."

"I was there Arthur, I don't understand why Pansy killing Callum in response to him killing Finny as part of his birthright has to do with this. I found myself offering a betrothal contract for Pansy just to keep her father from killing her but not before he killed three house-elves trying to protect her. So what does this have to do with anything?"

"You found an overwhelming need to protect a girl who killed the heir to a pure blood family?"

"Consider yourself luckily that you never had to deal with Callum. The whole Wizarding world is better without him; I'm not the only one in our circle who would have done the same thing."

"Did you know Finny was dating my son Charlie?"

"I remember Herrod screaming about him dating some wizard at some point but why?"

"Evidently, he was there the night Finny died. Pansy killed Callum to save Charlie..."

"Pansy Parkinson is a Guardian!" Lucius yelled interrupting Arthur. "The same girl that was betrothed to my son before she went and gave it up!"

Arthur launched out of the couch and towards Lucius, stopping in his face, "She didn't give anything up Lucius! She was raped and assaulted. The bastard left her for dead and she would have died if one of my sons hadn't found her. You should see the scars on her face, neck, and hands. So why don't you just give me the bloody bands and I'll just show myself the door."

The two men stared nose to nose, breathing hard but speechless waiting to see the other's next move first. Finally, Lucius sighed and backed up before saying, "I'll go get them – on one condition."

"And that is what Lucius?"

"I'd like to come with you."


	55. Solitary

**Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter nor do make money.**

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55. Solitary  
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Theo sat on the window seat in his room at Hogwarts, looking out across the great expanse of land that surrounded the castle. He was glad that there were no stars tonight as he knew he would find himself wishing on them; wishing for something that couldn't change now; something that he had the chance to change but never the courage.

Sitting there he thought about the moment after Pansy being attacked, how she could have been his again if only he had the courage to visit. However, every time he talked himself into it, there was Weasley sitting by her bedside with her; and the chicken in him would turn and walk back out of the infirmary.

But now she was married to _him_: his first love, the one he had thought of non-stop for years was married to _him_. He couldn't count the number of times he had hoped or wished or looked for a piece of magic that would send her running back to him and away from his former best mate only to lose her utterly, completely to the one person he had under-estimated since he first saw the gangly red-head their first year..

How could he have been so foolish as to let her go that easily, to let Weasley have his first love?

"I brought you something to eat," a soft voice interrupted his thoughts. He turned to see Hermione walking towards him with a plated sandwich in one hand and a cup in the other, he didn't have a chance to say anything before she quickly continued, "You weren't at dinner tonight."

"Thank you," he muttered before turning his head to gaze back out the window.

"I'll just leave them here," he heard in the distance as he wondered just where exactly here was before she took her leave.

At least he thought she had taken her leave, after moping for several more minutes, he ate the sandwich she brought him – finding himself completely scared that she made his sandwich just the way he liked it: ham, turkey and cheddar with barbeque sauce on wheat bread. Standing up to go and thank her, he saw that she had fallen asleep on his bed with tears still slowly cascading down her face.

Crawling back into his bed behind her, he wrapped his arm around her and wondered why this couldn't be enough as he buried his face in her soft, curls.


	56. Jump

**Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter nor do make money.**

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**56. Jump**

Turning around to see what Arthur was looking at, she saw Ron coming towards her. Tears she couldn't stop started to roll down her face in shear panic that this information was going to change everything. As he moved closer, the panic built in her until she couldn't stand any longer. Falling to the ground, she struggled to gather her breathing through her tears.

She gasped as she felt herself being pulled into a warm body. Words of comfort being whispered as she was lifted up. She clawed her way further into what she finally recognized as Ron's body. Holding on to his jumper, she whispered, "I'm so sorry. For everything": over and over again.

Her heart sank as he didn't respond as he carried her somewhere but she still repeated her words hoping to buy her something with him; buy her a bit of forgiveness for basically tricking him into marrying her.

"Pansy." She heard him whisper but she kept telling him she was sorry for everything.

"Pansy." His voice firmer this time as she clung to him tighter.

"Pansy." He said firmly pulling her away from his body, the shock caused her eyes to fly open and lock on to his blue ones. "Stop it."

"But...but...but..." she stuttered in between hiccups, drowning in his blue eyes through her fuzzy eyesight.

"Stop it," he repeated. "You have nothing to be sorry for."

"But...but...I binded...us...without your...knowledge," her ability to speak still impacted by the sobs and tears as she hung her head in shame.

"So what?"

"How can...you say...that?" she whispered between hiccups. "I took...your...choice away...from you."

"Pansy," he whispered, brushing her hair out of her face. "I made my choice weeks ago. And my choice was then and still is you."

"But..."

"Shhh," he continued, "Not twenty minutes ago, I went to my father to get the bands to have a binding ceremony done today between us."

"I know...but..."

"Pansy, stop fighting. Stop apologizing. Stop everything. So what if we didn't jump off the cliff the same way as everyone else -- the point is that we did. It's done. And I wouldn't change a thing."

Her tears finally spent, she looked up at him and asked, "Really?"

"Really," he responded gently, resting his forehead on hers. "You are mine as much as I am yours."

She flung her arms around him, and pressing her body against him, whispered her thanks as he held her until she fell asleep protected in his care.


	57. Young

**Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter nor do make money.**

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**57. Young**

They just looked too young.

Looked too young to have seen what they had seen, heard what they had heard, lived what they had heard.

They just looked so young.

Curled up on the couch. Pansy laying on top of Ron. Her head tucked close to his neck as it laid on his chest. A blanket laying on top of them. Her right hand entangled with his. The henna markings now crystal clear where the entwined hands laid against Ron's body. His own markings clear on the right hand that was wrapped around her; holding her close.

So young, in fact that everyone watching knew they were really keeping guard.

Molly sat in her chair, knitting as she watched the two sleep, thinking of how they were too young to be embarking on a marriage -- even though she and Arthur had been the same age when they eloped.

Arthur and Lucius stood resting against a relatively empty wall watching as they sipped on firewhisky. Arthur wishing that something in his youngest son's life would go easy. Lucius wishing that he hadn't been so quick to judge Miss Parkinson.

Draco sitting at the table in the kitchen with Charlie. Both sipping their drinks as they looked through the half-wall into the living room. Draco mentally doing the accounting about purchasing the two of them a cottage or a flat for after graduation. Charlie trying to find the will to return to Romania when he could easily see two people who needed him here.

Ginny sitting between Harry's legs on the steps. His arms wrapped around her as she leaned into him. Both wondering if they really had done enough though their minds said yes and their hearts said no.

All watching the couple who slept too peacefully for what they had lived through.


	58. Tragic

**Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter nor do make money.**

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58. Tragic  
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It should have been a happy day.

With nothing tragic about it; but it filtered through everything that was wrong.

There were no flowers: in her hair, in her hands, in his robes, on tables. There were no decorations.

There was no gown of white: she wore jeans and an oversized Cannon's jersey that had seen better days two decades ago.

There were no dress robes: he also wore jeans and a Cannon's jersey -- but at least his fit him.

There was no music to be played, only the ticking of the clock.

There was no officiant that stood waiting. No bridesmaids to lead the way. No groomsmen to stand by him.

She wasn't escorted by her father; in fact, none of her family were there. Only one she had considered a surrogate brother two lifetimes ago; and a former fiance and his father. Two people no bride would ever want present on their wedding day.

His family was there but they weren't: his parents, an older brother, and a younger sister were all that stood and watched as he solemnly promised her the world.

Promising her to love her, cherish her, protect her as he had done over and over again; tears forming in his eyes that he fought to hold back.

And she promised the same as she gripped his hands tight; her voice wavering; as tears slipped from her eyes.

Only an exchange of rings in the crowded living room of the Burrow would have told anyone outside what was going on inside -- that a wedding, a binding ceremony was being witnessed within.

That ended with a kiss that brought tears to everyone else's eyes.

Before the couple turned to the small collection of family and friends who were there.

As there would be no cake or reception afterwards. No parting words from the maid-of-honour or best man. No champagne toasts; no silly pictures; no first dances.

Only handshakes and hugs; amongst the tears and well-wishes before everyone retired for the night.


	59. Madness

**Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter nor do make money.**

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**59. Madness**

Pansy wasn't sure what she was suppose to do now.

So she was sitting on Ron's bed waiting. Dressed in the same jersey she was basically living in these days. While he got ready for bed in the bathroom. Her fingers fiddling with the ring now on her right hand.

She knew what the girl she had been would be doing right now -- on her 'wedding' night. She would have hit Agent Provocateur and now be dressed in the finest and most erotic lingerie that money could buy. That same girl would be strategically posed on the bed waiting for her husband -- hoping that the first time wouldn't be so bad as everyone told her; praying for her to get through tonight and look for to learning more tomorrow.

But she wasn't that girl anymore.

So she didn't know what she was suppose to do as she sat there and waited.

By the time Ron finally appeared she had worked herself up to the point that the moment he walked in, she burst out in tears; babbling that she didn't know what to do, she didn't know what he expected, he had already done so much for her and she was so lost, so confused.

Through her tears she had watched him rush to her and pull her into his body before resting his on the bed.

Through her madness she heard him whisper, "please don't say that". But then the words muddled one into the other until she couldn't quite make out any of them through her own cries and gasps.

But like she had done so many times before, she clung to him: her lifeline, her lighthouse, her way out of the darkness that consumed her and dictated her every action and her every reaction.

And in the bright light, she found near the end of her tunnel, the one that was bright blue and glassy; she could have sworn for the briefest of seconds that she saw her peace, her sanctuary, her alter.

And in that sacred moment, she found something real she could cling to as his lips found hers.

Her mouth found it's way open willingly as she clawed her way to get her body closer to him.

Any panic that had been in her body seeped away by the time she felt him lay her on the bed; his body next to hers while still covering hers protectively. His mouth still searching and seeking hers; her hands still grasping and clenching to his body.

She felt his hand, one of the pair she knew so well; knew the calluses on his fingertips and the roughness of his palm -- caress her leg and trail up her body tentatively. Not because he was unsure of himself but she could feel he was giving her control -- even though she was on her back and tucked up underneath his bigger body. Her body instinctively arched towards his when his fingers skimmed her hips; the same time she heard him gasp and then groan when he realized that there was nothing under the jersey she wore.

The sounds she had pulled out of his mouth, gave her confidence in that he wanted her and would give her the time, space, control she so desperately needed at the moment.

When she held onto his arm tighter and pulled another groan from his mouth, she finally had the courage to say what the former her would have said posed in lingerie when he walked through the door; "Please Ron."

She heard him moan her name and it energized her; sending a warmth running through her body -- something she didn't know it could do as she pulled him back toward her, claiming his lips as much as his hands claimed her body.

Her already befuddled mind swirled deeper into the abyss of desire -- desire for him and of him -- as she fumbled with his clothes the same time he was fumbling with hers. The moment she felt his naked chest against her own, his legs against hers, she pressed her body and moaned his name in adoration for in this moment he was her god and saviour.

The madness that surrounded them gave way to something else as their desperation ebbed away; leaving two people searching for something more and hoping that the other had it. Their eyes met and locked as the grasping hands slowed to gentle caresses; the hungry kisses evolved into lingering connections; their bodies began to move together -- legs weaving together as hips molded into another as stomachs pressed as chests softly moved as necks glided and faces sought their sanctuary. Two bodies moving with the tide of the heavens in his childhood bed: two souls rolling in the ebbs and flows of the wind, earth, water, and fire as they curled around its children for the first of many times to come.

And as the natural choir of their bodies, hearts and souls reached their pinnacle, hallelujahs were not offered and deities were not praised but their own simple names were whispered breathlessly in utter adoration to be carried by a gentle wind as their hands, lips, eyes, ears, mouth, bodies sought to feel every inch, capture every moment, imprint every feeling, retain every sound in this gathering of two persons invoking a magic long forgotten.

As time flowed from this moment with two still beating hearts, lungs now softly moving, hands caressing the other as if for the first time -- the sanctuary longed for, sought for, fought for, now lays before them. Theirs for the first time: to have and to hold from this day forward.

With a gentle kiss that lingers and a firm hold that protects, Pansy falls asleep happy and content with a smile on her face to dream of red-headed children.


	60. Knowledge

**Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter nor do make money.**

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60. Knowledge  
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Hermione sat on the sofa and stared at the letter from Ginny. All the words were a blur to her even with Ginny's easy to read loopy handwriting -- except two sentences: It's official. They did the binding last night at the Burrow.

And those words appeared larger than any other words in the letter. Standing up in front. Screaming her to notice them, notice them with bright blinking lights, shooting fireworks, a marching band, and the proverbial fat lady singing 'On My Own'.

"Hermione, what's the matter?"

Bleary-eyed she turned to the voice and choked out, "It's done. They did the binding last night at the Burrow."

"I know. Draco sent me an owl."

Her face widen in shock that he appeared completely ambivalent to the news that their former loves had done a binding ceremony.

She found herself hating the familiar cold, distant tone in his voice; the one she had come to regard as his "normal" tone. More than that, she hated to hear him put on airs about Pansy and Ron getting bonded with her, with no one else around caused her temper to start to seethe. Especially when she knew he was hurting as much as she was at the moment.

She hated the way he stood there, between her and the stairs that would take her to her bedroom, looking so calm and collected and seemingly okay with what had happened when she was anything but.

Yet, what sent her temper over the edge was the condescending look he was sending her way.

She wanted to yell at him. Remind him that she knew him. She knew he was hurting. No different than what she was feeling. But she couldn't tell him that.

Only because she knew her voice wouldn't work properly.

If at all.

Instead, taking a page from Harry and Ron, she stood up from the couch and started to stalk toward her room. Nearing him, she shoved him hard before continuing towards the stairs not caring that she sent him falling over a chair before landing on the ground.

Her foot hit the first step when she heard him yell, "Hermione, what the fuck?"

But she didn't stop.

"Hermione!"

"Hermione!"

"Hermione!"

Reaching her room, she spun; leaning over the balustrade and screamed, "Just stay away from me. Just stay the fuck away until you have the balls to admit how you feel. You don't think much of Ron but at least he doesn't hide what he is feeling. At least he is man enough to show _something_ when everything is _not_ okay. You know, he's more of a man than you will ever be whether you like that or not."

Screaming again, she pushed off the balustrade and ran into her room, slamming the door behind her.

Crying out again, she flung herself onto her bed. Curling up with her pillow she cried until she fell asleep wondering if she would ever find someone who would actually see her, want her, want to be with her, and quite possibly keep her. She had always thought that would be Ron but with a hiccup and a wail, she finally acknowledged that dream was gone -- for good.

And she was left with nothing.

* * *

Theo hadn't moved from where he stood. He just stared at the door that guarded Hermione's room. Not really thinking of anything in particular, as he stared at the door; he just felt helpless and he hated that.

After several minutes and no sign of her coming back out to talk to him about what exactly he did to set her off, he sighed defeated. Shoving his hands in his pockets and hanging his head, he dragged his feet as he went to his room.

He managed to lose both girls he cared about deeply in the same day.

Maybe he wasn't the masochist Draco and Blaise accused him of being when it came to girls. Maybe he was just an arse who didn't deserve anyone.

And certainly not someone like Hermione.


	61. Bewildered

**Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter nor do make money.**

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61. Bewildered  
**

A ring.

A silver ring.

A silver ring on her right hand.

A silver ring on emhis Princess'/em right hand.

A flash of silver on an another hand. A matching ring.

A matching ring to the one she wore.

A matching ring on a more masculine hand caused him to snap his head up befuddled and stare at who owned that hand.

There in front of him, Weasley was holding _his Princess'_ hand with rings on their hands. That bastard had stolen what was rightfully his. She belonged to him, not the bloody Weasel, him. A real pure-blood, not some traitor like Weasley or someone who bought their status like Malfoy.

She belonged to him. She belonged to him not the minute he took her virginity but when she survived. Survived him putting Malfoy's girl in her place.

He knew in that moment that the rumors about Callum Parkinson's death was true. The ones that no one of any standing talked about except behind closed doors with only their most trusted friends after having too much to drink. The ones that hinted that there may be more to Pansy Parkinson then meets the eye, that she was a worthy pure-blood princess -- worthy of his family's last name. The combination of that and her being Malfoy's girl was enough to make her his first -- and now only -- target when he set out to destroy the people and families that overlooked him and his family -- a good, old, pure-blood family that deserved the money the Malfoy's had stolen over the years and the recognition the Weasley's kept stumbling into.

Watching Weasley help her onto the train, he was just thankful he had had time to finish that heir charm because he could make that bonding disappear and she would publicly be his, on his arm, his own Princess.

Smirking as he cracked his fingers, he couldn't wait to see Weasley's face when she was bound to him. It would be more enjoyable then watching Malfoy's face after she had been found and he abruptly no longer had a fiancee.

Now he just had to get Pansy alone again: to activate the heir charm, to make her a willing participant as they created his child within her.

And he knew it was only a matter of time before he would find another crack and he would be able to grab her.

Making her his for the rest of her days.


	62. Smirk

**Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter nor do make money.**

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62. Smirk  
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He had planned to take a quick look at who entered his compartment but he couldn't tear his eyes away from the confident way she held her body, the way her smile turned into a smirk as she neared him, the way way her pale blue eyes shined against her olive skin, the way she whispered, "You're drooling Draco", before sitting down in front of him.

"No I wasn't, I was daydreaming about your sister," he snapped back, he hated the fact that not only had he been so bloody obvious, he had been caught by her. It put him in an extreme disadvantage because he was one of the few people who understood just how dangerous the youngest Greengrass could be when she wanted something. She'd been known to make Blaise quiver in his thousand pound loafers with just a look.

"Uh-huh," she said with the most delicious look on her face as she pulled something out of her bag. Draco wanted nothing more than to wipe that look off her face and he a few ideas how to do just that. He watched as she handed him a piece of parchment, "I believe this is what you wanted."

Grabbing the parchment out of her hand, he took a quick look at it and smirked before folding it up. Looking back up at her, he said, "Perfect. Thank you. If you ever need anything..."

"Speaking of that," she purred as she slowly got to her feet. "I would appreciate it if you stop lying to yourself."

"Lying about what, Asteria?" he replied getting to his feet, putting his body within centimeters of her. Enjoying the quick breath she took in response to his closeness. Maybe it wouldn't be as hard as he thought to put her back into her place.

But he enjoyed even more the soft choking she made as she tried to hold her own against him as she whispered, "Exactly who you want."

"And exactly who would that be?" he murmured, flicking his wand towards the entry to the compartment blacking out the windows. His eyes firmly on the delicious quiver her lips were starting to take. He wondered if they tasted as good as they looked at the moment.

"The person you want," she whispered causing Draco to smirk again as he saw the fear flood her eyes. "I'll see you around Draco," she added quickly, grabbing her bag and heading to the door.

She didn't get far, as he caught her arm and in one fluid motion tossed her bag aside as he pulled her into his body and took what was rightfully his: her lips. He took his time teasing her tasty lips to open to him, to allow him entrance before pulling away softy and whispering, "Asteria."

Picking up her bag he handed it back to her and watched her take the bag and run out of the compartment, leaving him smirking in her wake. And that's how Blaise found him moments later.

With his cool, unaffected disdain, Blaise asked as he joined Draco in the compartment, "Should I even ask why you look like a cat who got the canary?"

"Only if you want to part with your galleons now," Draco laughed taking a seat.

"I'm impressed," Blaise smirked taking a seat across from Draco. "Didn't see slap you four times last time you were in the same room together?"

"It was three."

"Still impressive. So what do you plan to do for an encore?"

"Do you think she would actually let me buy her a drink the next time we go to Hogsmeade?"

"Two hundred galleons that she will actually dump her drink on you."

"Oh ye of little faith."

"Oh ye of an absurd amount of arrogance. You have as good of a chance of getting Asteria Greengrass to date you as we have in getting Theo to tell Granger he is head over heals in love with her."

Draco thought for a moment and groaned, "I'm a dead man, aren't I?"

"Yes," Blaise drawled, studying his nails, "But not until after you pay up."


	63. Moon

**Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter nor do make money.**

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63. Moon  
**

"Hermione, do you have a moment?"

The soft voice snapped Hermione out of the trance she had fallen into as she watched the latest snowfall from the window of the Griffyndor girls' room. She had hidden away in the room as quickly as possible after the returning feast. Watching the simple happiness she saw between Ron and Pansy hurt more than she had anticipated. She truly wanted to be happy for them but the happiness was hard to bear when she was so miserable and alone herself.

Looking over towards where the sound was coming from, she watched as Pansy emerged into the moonlight from the shadows of the darken room. Hermione was tempted to tell her no she didn't have a moment and she would appreciate it if she left her alone after everything she had taken away from her but instead she said, "Sure."

"I know this hasn't been easy for you," Pansy whispered while fiddling with her fingers. Hermione thought that might have been the understatement of the year and wanted to point that out but she bit her tongue as Pansy continued, "And I know I didn't do anything in the past to deserve what you have done." Again Hermione thought, huge understatement and was about ready to retort when Pansy finished, "But thank you."

Hermione was officially speechless. Though her mind was reeling with everything she wanted to tell her.

"Thank you for everything. For helping Theo with the research. For organizing the shifts I know you all have been undertaking since the last attack. For even doing them yourself. I don't deserve anything you have done for me and I'm sorry that you got hurt in the process."

At that moment, Hermione wondered if one could be beyond speechless with her mind shutting down.

"I just wanted to say thank you and to tell you I really love him and will do everything in my power not to hurt him. He means the world to me. And I hope one day, I'll be good enough to deserve him."

And now, Hermione felt very small. Itty-bitty in fact. Or a hole in the floor would be good right about now.

"That's it. I just wanted to say thank you more than anything. I'll leave you alone now," Pansy added quietly before turning and walking back into the shadows.

Jumping to her feet, Hermione called out, "wait", as she hurried after her. She almost bumped into her in the darkness moments before she said, "You are welcome. But if you want my opinion, if anyone deserves him it's you. Don't get me wrong, and I know you don't want to hear this and I probably shouldn't say this, but I know I love him and I could never make him as happy as you do. And that's what hurts -- he's the kind of guy who needs to be needed and I really don't need him."

"I didn't come here to argue with you," Pansy whispered quietly, "but you are wrong Hermione. I want him and he wants to be wanted. Part of that is me _wanting_ to need him and him _wanting_ to be needed but you are the one who simply needs him."

Hermione thought the wind had been knocked out of her.

"I needed Draco for many reasons, some of them Theo may have told you, but the point is, it wasn't enough; it made me too vulnerable to Draco's whims and fancies. Especially because he knew I wasn't going anywhere. He flaunted girls in front of me and belittled me to any audience he could. Relationships don't work when they are built on need. They work when they are built on want and desire to be the better person, to keep the person you want happy, to always have the threat of them leaving hanging over your head -- you work harder, better, smarter and the reward is that much richer."

Hermione couldn't do anything but stare at the girl fiddling with her hands; her eyes holding fast to their progress. She didn't know what to say or could say at the moment. Pansy Parkinson had managed to render her speechless twice in five minutes. She couldn't remember being rendered speechless twice in her life.

"Hermione, I'm not saying that to be mean or anything. I just don't want you to fall into the same trap I did with Draco. Draco and I may be friends now but even to this day, he still doesn't always do things right by me because our initial relationship was built on need...This may be overstepping boundaries but I do know someone who wants nothing more in this world than to be with you. And that's what you deserve: a good man who thinks you hung the sun and moon in the skies while the heavens lurk in only your eyes."

"Pansy," Hermione whispered unable to say anything else as she watched Pansy turn and walk away without saying another word. Hermione didn't know how long she stood there in the shadows staring at the closed door before Padma and Pavarti came bounding in chatting away about someone who looked at one of them at dinner.

"Hermione," Pavarti's voice rung from the distance, though she was only a few metres away. "Are you okay?"

Hermione just shook her head and tore out of the room. She didn't stop running until she found herself in the owlry where she fell to the ground and cried.


	64. Summer

**Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter nor do make money.**

* * *

**64. Summer**

Pansy sat by herself off in the corner of the eighth year common room as Ron worked at beating Ernie MacMillan again at chess. Her mind kept drifting off to the conversation she had just had with Hermione. She had only meant to go up there and thank her for everything thing she had done for her but she wasn't quite sure how she got to the point of not only informing Hermione just how wrong she was but also in a way confessing Theo's secret to her. Sadness rushed over her as she watched the snowfall as she twiddled with her hand, waiting for the peace she hoped would come soon.

The noise of a chair being pulled up next to her caused her to jump. She tried to get away and to Ron, but a hand gently and firmly held her in place as she finally recognized it was Draco as he said, "Sorry. Didn't mean to scare you."

Taking a deep breath to calm her now shattered nerves, she watched as he let go of her and took a seat in the chair he pulled up next to hers. Slowly, she reclaimed her own chair but her eyes never left him as he fiddled with something in his hands she continued to breath as calmly as possible. She couldn't even begin to bring herself to sit back into the chair and instead only rested on the edge of the seat.

After a few minutes with no response from him, she asked perched on the seat, "What do you want Draco?"

"I know I haven't done much right by you over the years and I know this isn't going to even begin to make it up to you but I'd like to try," Draco said not to her, but to whatever he was holding in his hands. "I just want you to know that the last few years you really were my best friend, and I think it's about time I start honestly trying to be your friend."

The lump that formed in her throat prevented her from saying anything as he handed her what turned out to be a key as he said, "I didn't know what you and the Wea--Ron's plans were for after graduation but I thought that might help...I took the liberty of setting you two up a vault at Gringotts. In there is a wedding gift from my family. Father also helped me to acquire what should have been your dowry from your parents and what should have been your inheritance if Callum had lived, both are also in there. Lastly, Father convinced your parents that should the two of you ever have a son, then that child will be the heir to the Parkinson estate. Regardless, there's more than enough for the two of you to find a place of your own this summer as well as get you two on your feet without having to stress about money."

"Draco..." Pansy whispered as tears started to fall down her face. She had never expected him to do this for her. "You didn't..."

"I know I didn't," he replied softly. "But I needed to. I want to be your friend Pansy. And I know that has to start with me doing right by you."

Flinging her arms around his neck, she felt his own tears wet her shoulder. Letting him hold onto her, she opened her eyes and found Ron's, meeting his small smile with her own before he turned back to his game.

And she turned her attention back to the friend she thought she would never have.


	65. Weakness

**Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter nor do make money.**

* * *

**65. ****Weakness**

_A/N: This piece is extremely graphic. Proceed with caution._

He couldn't stop himself.

And he didn't try.

The moment he saw her in the library. Deep within the stacks of books.

Her guard dog and self-appointed bodyguards no where to be seen. At least not near her.

The closest one being the twit Granger and he could take her. Just like he did to Bones before Weasley interrupted.

But this time he wouldn't have to wait on the charm.

This time it would be faster.

Especially now that she was always in skirts these days.

He could take what was rightfully his before they could even get to her in time. Take her away from that self-righteous blood traitor who didn't deserve a princess; not a pure-blood princess at least.

Casting his indispensable shield charm, that had bought him all the time he needed when Weasley had come tearing into the greenhouse, he quietly and quickly made his way down the bookshelves. His smirk grew as he approached her, watching her continue to flip through a book unaware of him.

His raised his wand and cast the silencing charm he knew he would need. The force of the spell caused her to drop the book with a loud thud and look at him, her eyes wide and fearful. He found immense joy in watching her mouth open but no sound came out.

Growling, he continued towards her as she moved back. He wanted to laugh at her vain attempt to maintain distance between them. His princess would soon be his.

Grabbing her by her arms, he pushed her the rest of the way as she fought his grip trying to free her arms. Her head landing with a resounding thud against the wall causing her to stop fighting momentarily as he watched her eyes momentarily roll back before she found her way back to him. Pressing his arm across her throat, to hold her in place against the stone wall, he used his free hand to slide it up her leg and under her skirt. He curled his fingers around the side of her knickers and with a quick pull, snapped them so she was now more open to him.

A radiating heat spread over him. He knew he didn't have much time. Blindly he cast a spell backwards, one that would ensure he had plenty of time to make her his, and went to freeing himself from his pants as his princess kept fighting him.

When no other spells hit his shield charm, he smirked as he whispered, "No one can save you this time. It won't do you any good to fight us anymore. You are mine."

Pulling himself out of his pants, he started to lean forward when the world went suddenly black.

* * *

Pansy watched as Smith's eyes rolled back before he slumped against her, the arm bar across her throat falling away. Using every ounce of strength she had, she pushed him off her until he landed with a thud.

Heaving hard, trying to catch her breath, she looked ahead and saw Hermione, pale as a ghost, blood spreading across her chest before her eyes closed and she fell to her the ground.

Pansy yelled, "Hermione!" but no sound came out of her mouth. Running to her fallen body, Pansy fell to her knees. Her hands going to Hermione's chest, instinctively trying to stop the blood. Hoping someone would find them, but no one came and she couldn't bare to bring herself to leave Hermione all alone. Not after she had saved her.

Her frustration mounting as her voice remained soundless with every scream for help that she tried. In shear agony and desperation, she threw her hands up in the air and started to scream soundlessly again, but this time her voice swelled as the bookshelves on either side went tumbling down; taking on a domino like effect that sent students running.

She stopped in disbelief as the noise echoed through the library before she returned her focus back to Hermione who still seemed to be losing blood and started to whisper, "Please hold on. Helps coming. Please Hermione. Please for Theo. Please Hermione, don't leave him. He loves you so much. You can't leave him."

"Pansy!"

Lifting her head up she saw Ron running towards her with Draco, Neville, Ginny and Harry fast on his heels. Crying, she yelled, "Please. Oh merlin, the bleeding won't stop. Please."

She felt Ron scoop her up and pull her back as the other's went to Hermione. The commotion grew as Ron held her: students stared gaping, their clothing covered in dust; Madame Pince running to were Hermione laid surround by the others; professors running in -- some trying to get the students out as others ran to Hermione.

And as the people started to clear she saw Theo, on his knees with tears running down his face as Blaise held him against his chest.

Pulling away from Ron, she looked to see Smith still lying on the ground, having been hit by what appeared to be a book in the falling of the bookshelves. Fighting out of Ron's grasp, and ignoring his questions, she hurried over to Smith's unconscious body. When she was close enough, she gave his body a good strong kick. And then another one. And another one. Until she fell to her knees screaming, her fists starting to beat him as she screamed with every punch she landed, "You pompous arrogant bastard! You fucking low-life twat! You miserable excuse for a human being! I hope they castrate you! You! You! You! You kill her and I will, I will, I will make you pay. You take her away from him and I will take away your bits you fucking arse hole..."

She never finished as Ron pulled her off Smith's body. Burying her face into Ron's sweater, wrapped up once again in the safety of his arms, Pansy finally let go completely and cried.


	66. Balance

**Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter nor do make money.**

* * *

**66. Balance  
**

Sitting on the bed next to Hermione's, his eyes focused on her now peaceful face, Theo found himself teetering on the edge of breaking down and withdrawing completely.

The strong, aromatic scent of firewhisky pervaded his precarious grip on reality as a baritone voice broke through the walls he had started to build with, "I thought you could use this."

Looking over, he saw Ron Weasley with a bottle and another glass in one hand as well as the full glass he had extend, "Go ahead. It's just firewhisky. If it makes you feel better I pilfered it from Malfoy."

Sadly, it didn't make him feel better because he wished it was Draco or Blaise handing him the drink but they had disappeared long ago as well as most others. He could kind of understand Potter walking away as he had after everything he had seen last year, and Ron having to take Ginny back to her rooms with Pansy in tow but he figured Draco and Blaise could have stayed with him just a little longer. However, they shot out of the infirmary not long after Hermione's friends had left.

Taking the glass, he murmured, "Thank you," before turning back to watch her. Quietly he sipped the drink, feeling the bed sink as Ron apparently was joining him before asking, "Where's Pansy?"

"She stayed with Ginny. Neville and Luna are also with them. They were trying to get her into bed when I left."

"And Potter?"

"Off on his own."

"Why aren't you with him?" Theo asked, as he heard the clink of glass against the stone floor.

It felt like several minutes before Weasley replied, but it probably was only a few seconds, "Honestly, I was on my way to look for him but then I saw Zabini pulling Tracey into your all's bedroom and Draco disappearing into some classroom with a bird and well, Harry prefers to deal with stuff on his own, so here I am."

"You know that makes no sense."

"Okay, how about your two best mates are getting shagged while you sit here with her probably driving yourself crazy with everything you think you could have done or should have done while worrying not so much about if she will wake up but if she will survive. So having been through that last part myself, I figured you needed a friend more than Harry at the moment who likes to be left alone anyway. So here I am. Better?"

Theo found himself floored at that explanation. He couldn't find the words nor his voice to express the gratitude that was flooding over him at the moment. Never in a million years, even after everything they had gone through this past year and the lifetime before that, would he ever feel thankful for someone to commiserate with, for someone who understood just what he was feeling and wasn't going to preach or tell him he just needed to get laid. In this singular moment, he understood completely why Pansy chose him; Weasley had somehow become a man while the rest of them were still clinging to their childhoods.

He especially appreciated Ron letting him have his silence for a few more minutes before saying, "I'm glad Madame Pomfrey let you stay by the way. They made me go back my room and it was awful to be there not knowing what I would find in the morning."

"They didn't let you stay?" Theo asked surprised, he assumed that Weasley had stayed from the beginning. At least that's what it seemed to him. Weasley had been there in the infirmary with Pansy morning, noon, and night; every time Theo had tried to go himself.

"No," Ron softly replied. "But I know why and even understand why they did it -- trying to protect me... But it didn't make the stress any easier."

"Why?"

Theo turned his head when he heard no answer from Ron. He studied him as Ron finished his drink and poured himself another one. Seeing a tear slip out onto Ron's face, he finally heard him sigh and explain, "Because none of us believed she would make it through the night."

Theo's heart stopped. Slamming back the rest of his drink at that piece of information, he found himself being offered the bottle when he had finished. Taking the bottle with a shaking hand, he poured himself a new drink. He had heard rumors about how bad her assault was given the amount of blood Ron supposedly had on him when he returned that night but he had never thought, for even one second, how bad it really was.

"I probably shouldn't have told you that," Ron whispered, taking the bottle back and setting it on the floor.

"No I'm glad you did. I'm sorry you went through that by yourself."

"So you understand completely now, why I'm here?"

Theo just nodded his head before quietly saying, "It turned out it looked worse than it was. The healers from St. Mungo's said it would be a couple of days before she would wake after losing so much blood but that they think she will make a completely recovery."

"I'm glad to hear that," Ron whispered. "I always thought our lives would be so much easier after Voldemort's death but it hasn't been that way. Especially for her. She didn't deserve what I did to her or to watch everything happened."

Theo sighed, wanting to tell Ron he was right, but instead said, "Well you didn't deserve what you had to go through either and neither did Pansy."

He expected Ron to say something in return, though he didn't know what. However, Ron just sat there quietly sipping on his drink. Theo turned to look at him, studying the man sitting beside him: the silent strength that radiated off him, the determination to hold it together, the million thoughts Theo could see rolling through his eyes, simple gestures, and sighs. After a few minutes, Theo turned back to Hermione and tried to focus on everything he was going to tell her when she woke.

"Just be honest with her," Ron's voice interrupted his thoughts. "Logical and thorough declarations would probably help too with her but also let her see what you are saying. Let her see that you care for her when you say it...She always says she is a visual person -- whatever that means."

Theo turned his head, shocked that Ron seemed to read his thoughts. He didn't say anything as Ron gave off a soft laugh and said, "Even if Pansy hadn't already told me and I hadn't seen it for myself, it's written all over your face at the moment."

"But..."

"Just remember besides me there's Harry, my four older brothers, and a bloody terrifying little sister. Hurt her and I can't promise you that anyone will be able to save you from Ginny. We'll probably be lucky to find you in one piece to be perfectly honest."

"But she won't..." Theo started before his voice trailed off thinking of all the ways she had gone out of her way to avoid him, talk to him, have anything to do with him since she yelled at him in the common room the day they had been informed that Ron and Pansy had done a binding ceremony.

"She won't...?"

"Talk to me," he finally whispered. "She's been avoiding me for two weeks now. Ever since..."

"Ever since the two of you were notified of the binding?"

Sighing, Theo just nodded.

After a few minutes Ron responded, "If she finds out I told you this, I'll throw you off of the astronomy tower but she's been crying on Ginny and Harry's shoulder non-stop about that since Pansy inadvertently made her realize just who she wanted and who she needed in her life."

Theo wasn't sure what he was suppose to say because he wasn't sure if he completely understood the implications of what Ron was telling him.

"And everyone says I'm thick," Ron said with a choppy laugh. "She wants you Theo. She may need Harry and me but she wants you. I don't know all the details about that fight she said you two had and frankly from what I have been told it was more of her yelling at you then you actually yelling back but I do know I'm frankly tired of having a best friend who breaks down every time she sees you because she honestly believes you won't forgive her. When she wakes up, she better know just what exactly you see when you look at her."

"And what is that?"

"See," Ron said, refilling his glass before handing the bottle to Theo as he said, "if we are going to be friends, then we will have to come to the understanding that I'm the dense one. Anyway, I know what I see when I look at Pansy and Harry's told me what he sees when he looks at Ginny, so what do you see when you look at her?"

"The heavens," he whispered before taking a sip off his drink. "The sun, the moon, the stars, everything."

"That wasn't so hard. Now you just have to grow the bollocks to tell her that."

"Can I ask a personal question?"

"Shoot."

"What do you see when you look at Pansy?"

"I see her." Theo about choked on his drink when he heard those words. Ron just laughed, before continuing, "Don't worry Harry did the same thing. As did most of my brothers to be honest with you but it's true. I see her -- happy, laughing, and whole. There is nothing more beautiful to me in this world than to wake up and see her right beside me."

"What does Harry see?"

"Peace. Which frankly amazes me more than anything."

"Why is that?"

"You have met my sister, right," Ron responded incredulous. "Small little imp with a nasty bat-boogey hex and more trouble than a Weasley Whizbang on her good days?"

Theo couldn't help but laugh out loud as Ron continued to rave about how the hell Harry could see peace when talking about his sister. Hearing Ron's impassioned speech start to fall apart as the two of them laughed, brought him something he couldn't quite put his finger on. All he could safely say is that having Ron Weasley as a friend might be the best thing a person could ask for at times like these. Theo just hated that it took him this long to figure this out.


	67. Bright

**Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter nor do make money.**

* * *

**67. Bright  
**

Ron was finally making it back to his room. He had stayed with Theo in the infirmary until he had fallen asleep in the bed next to Hermione. But now it was time for Ron, to find his own comfort after watching his friends and classmates own innocence disappear.

Being after midnight, he didn't expect Pansy to be up. He only hoped that she hadn't decided to stay with Ginny tonight. That she was now sleeping in their bed in their room off the eighth year common room. Because all he wanted to do was wrap his arms around her, pull her into his body, breath her natural scent of lavender and chamomille and fall asleep before the news of today's incident hit emThe Daily Prophet/em. He was not looking forward to the next few days full of trips to the Ministry, interviews with Aurors, letters and quite possibly visits from family members.

Walking into the common room, his day finally became a bit brighter. There on the sofa in front of the dimming light of the fire was Pansy sound asleep in the Cannon's jersey he had realized days ago, was never going to be his again, and a pair of his pants. She looked so peaceful curled up on the sofa.

Sitting down on the floor by her, he gently brushed her hair out of face. Taking the moment just to appreciate the spite of the girl that had sent his life first into a tailspin before proving to be the salvation he had spent a lifetime looking for.

"You're back," he heard her mumble, half-awake, half-asleep.

"Yes," he whispered back as he kept gently touching and caressing her silken locks.

"How's Hermione?"

"Theo says it looked alot worse than it turned out to be. It will be a few days before she wakes but they anticipate a full recovery."

"And Theo?"

"Doing his best to hold himself together. Madame Pomfrey is letting him stay by her so I think that's helping him out."

"That's good," she mumbled. Ron smiled at how she was fighting to stay awake but the stress of the day was winning out.

"Why don't we go to bed?" he gently asked, but ended up with no response. Chuckling lightly, he moved to stand.

Once on his feet, he slid his arms around her and as slowly and gently as possible lifted her up into his arms as she mumbled, "Luna stayed with Ginny tonight. And Neville's with Harry. And I get you."

Kissing her on the forehead, he murmured, "And I get you."

"That's good. Because you are stuck with me."

Letting out a laughing sigh, Ron whispered, "And you are stuck with me," before carrying her into their bedroom.


	68. Letters

**Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter nor do make money.**

* * *

**68. Letters  
**

Just as Ron feared the letters started arriving as soon as he woke. Most were addressed to both him and Pansy which he just gave her to read but Charlie had sent one to each of them as well as the Malfoys sending one to just Pansy. And one she said casually was from her aunt, before putting it in her bag without reading it.

Yet the letter he was most interested in arrived at lunch when Pansy and him were sitting at the Slytherin table. A black eagle owl had swooped in and landed in front of Pansy. The rest of the Slytherin eighth years went silent as Pansy just stared at the owl.

Ron looked toward the others but they were just as fixated on the owl as Pansy. After a few minutes, which felt like hours, she took the letter from the owl's leg and stuffed into her bag. The owl though stayed where he was.

Finally, he heard her whisper, "Go Abelard. Just go." And the black eagle owl took off.

He went to ask Pansy about it but got sidetracked by Draco.

And when he went to ask about it as they were leaving, Theo distracted him.

He tried to ask her as they were leaving DADA, but Blaise wanted to ask him a question.

And that continued the rest of the day. People interrupting him, every time he went to ask Pansy about the mysterious letter. Until he had almost forgotten about the letter.

Almost.

While at Quidditch practice, he thought about all the ways to approach her about the letter. He had become so used to her telling him everything that her hiding the letter as well as her friends distracting him from asking, frankly bothered him. If she didn't want to talk about it, that was fine -- all she had to do was tell him. But to avoid the topic with him, that bothered him more.

Walking into their room after quidditch practice to grab a quick shower before dinner, he stopped at the sight of her curled up in the window seat, looking out over the grounds of Hogwarts. The mysterious letter crinkled in her hands as she fiddled with it: rolling it up, and then unrolling it; wadding it up, only to smooth it out again. She was so lost in her thoughts, that she never even turned her head when he closed the door.

Every approach, comment, thought, he had come up with during practice went out the window. That letter went deeper than he thought but the look on her face.

Leaving his equipment next to the door, he walked over to her. Ruffling her head, he kissed her on the head and asked, "Is everything okay?"

"I don't know," she whispered.

"Do you want to talk about it?"

"I don't know," she whispered again. He pushed her to the side a bit more so he could sit by her on the window seat. Now looking at her face, he could see the remnants of tears dried on her face; though her eyes showed no signs now of tears.

"Does it have to do with that?" he asked gently, nodding to the letter that she held in her hands.

"Maybe."

"Pansy..." he whispered, thinking that a soothing tone would drawl whatever was bothering her out.

"My aunt wrote me," she whispered back. "The one I would have been sent to live with if it hadn't been for you." Ron's heart fell at the strangled tone her voice took on as she slowly said those words. "She saw the story in emThe Daily Prophet/em and she wants to know exactly what her brother had planned for me. She says that he had lied to her in the fall and that she had not been told the truth of why plans were being made to send me to her. She begged me for her forgiveness, that she would never have agreed to take me in if her brother had told her the truth; that she had to give her permission for me to even step on the island."

Ron found himself speechless. There were no right words at this moment. Only shallow ones. So he kept quite and switched his position to sit by her. She didn't say anything as he maneuvered her into his lap; the letter now tightly squashed in her hand.

"I knew my parents were throwing me away," Pansy whispered so low that Ron barely heard it. "It just hurts to hear someone tell you that. That you meant so little to them, that they lied, schemed, and plotted to make me disappear without actually killing me. My parents wanted to throw me away."

Kissing her gently on the forehead before squeezing her tight, he continued to hold her as she started to shake in his arms. Whispering, "What can I do?"

"Just hold me," she whispered back.

And that's exactly what he did as she continued to fiddle with the letter in her hands. He simply held her, squeezing her every so often and occasionally placing gentled kisses on her head, as she either clung to him, shook, or softly cried.

He didn't know how late it was when she finally broke the silence with, "The black eagle owl earlier. It belongs to my parents," as she held up the letter that had been the source of his curiosity all day. "My parents' wrote me. But I can bring myself to burn it or look at it."


	69. Corruption

**Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter nor do make money.**

* * *

**69. Corruption  
**

A gentle knock on the door stirred Ron from where he sat on the window seat holding a sleeping Pansy. The letter from her parents scrunched in her hands.

As quietly as possible, he said, "Come in." His eyes never left Pansy, hoping that he hadn't woke her. When he saw that he hadn't, he turned to see who had entered and was surprised to see Draco, Blaise, and Tracey come in the room.

"Can we talk?" Draco said softly. "Tracey will stay with her if you would like."

Confused, he shook his head gently and said, "Sure. Let me just get her to bed."

Carefully, he moved to stand before gripping her tighter to stand up. He quickly moved to the bed, trying to keep her body as still as possible as Tracey had already moved to pull down the sheets.

Ron whispered, "Thank you," to her as he set Pansy on the bed. Kissing her on the forehead, as he pulled up the covers and tucked her in.

Standing up, he followed Draco and Blaise out of the room.

Once they had exited the room and Ron had closed the door, he asked, "What's up?"

"I've been summoned to the Manor. It's been cleared with McGonagall, I thought you might like to come," Draco said, his voice low as he continued to move across the room forcing Ron to walk to keep up.

"I don't understand."

"A particular father has sought an audience with Mr. Malfoy," Blaise responded, holding open the door to take the three of them out of the eighth year common room.

"Mr. Parkinson?" Ron asked.

"Actually no."

"Which I know is surprising."

"Especially after that letter arrived today," Draco added. Ron looked between Draco and Blaise and tried to figure out how the hell they started to channel his brothers.

Unfortunately, that thought about Fred made him stop as he became choked up.

"You coming Weasley?"

"My father can't keep the bastard there all night."

"Yeah," he struggled to say and took off at a light jog to catch up with the other too. "So if it isn't Mr. Parkinson then who is it?"

He wasn't sure if he liked the smirk that crossed both Draco and Blaise's faces when Draco asked, "So does the name Smith ring any bells?"

Ron officially saw red.

"Good that's the reaction we wanted," Blaise drawled. "Unfortunately, you can't kill him. Not yet at least."

"Then why are you letting me come along?" Ron growled.

"Because strongI/strong think he needs to be reminded that there is no one he can turn to," Draco drawled as he opened the front doors to the castle.

"Seems the Smiths haven't realized just who Pansy's married too." Blaise smirked. "Now let's go have some fun."

center* * * * */center

Ron followed Draco and Blaise through the entryway of the Manor. He couldn't believe he was in the Manor and about to confront Smith's father. Everything seemed surreal at the moment. But what he really wanted to know at the moment was when could get a nice quiet life without the adventure and drama.

He definitely was taking George up on the offer to help out at the shop. There was no way he could handle being an Auror.

"Why hello Draco, Blaise," he heard Mr. Malfoy drawl before he added, "Mr. Weasley. I wasn't expecting you. So may I ask how Pansy is doing?"

"As well as could be expected."

"And Miss Granger?"

"Theo Nott," Ron said, looking at Smith's father, "tells me she is doing better."

Watching Smith's father go white was more than enough for Ron at the moment as Mr. Malfoy continued, "Ephraim, I know you know my son Draco and his friend Blaise but I don't know if you have had the pleasure of meeting Pansy's husband, Mr. Ronald Weasley. Mr. Weasley, Mr. Smith."

"I would say pleasure but it's not the sentiment I'm feeling at the moment," Ron responded coolly, remaining at the door.

"Now Ephraim, as to what were speaking about before these gentlemen joined us," Lucius responded innocently, moving to the bar to pour a drink. "Oh that's right, something about the spot of trouble your son has become mired in. Draco, Blaise, Ron, can I offer you something to drink before we get down to business?"


	70. Transformation

**Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter nor do make money.**

* * *

**70. Transformation  
**

The jostling of the bed woke Pansy. Slowly she stretched and tried to open her eyes but the sleep was still heavy within them.

Softly, she asked, "Ron is everything okay?"

"Yeah," he replied quietly, kissing her on the forehead. "I was trying not to wake you."

"Where did you go?"

"The Manor with Draco and Blaise," he whispered, pulling her body into his. "Now go back to sleep."

She didn't have a clue as to how he expected **that**, after that bit of information. Pulling out of his arms, she rolled over to face him and asked, "Why did you all go to the Manor?"

"Can we talk about this in the morning?" he yawned.

"No. Why did you go to the Manor?"

Sighing, she couldn't see his eyes that clearly but she knew he was rolling them before he replied, "Because Smith's father went to Lucius about help getting Smith out of trouble."

"And?" she tentatively replied, unsure of not only the feelings that were cascading through her insides, but her reactions to this bit of information.

"He was basically told where to stick it. Quite colourfully from Lucius and Draco."

"And?"

"That was about it. He got the point very quickly after seeing me and left."

"That was it?"

"That's what I said. It was more of a visual threat then anything else," he yawned again. "So is there anything I can do to convince you to go to sleep and we will talk more in the morning?"

Caressing his face, she leaned over and placed a gentle kiss on his lips. Whispering, she told him to go to sleep and turned over on her side. Instantaneously, his arm wrapped around her waist and pulled her into him. She lay as still as possible as he nuzzled her hair and whispered, "Good night beautiful."

She smiled and sighed at the familiar good night blessing.

She laid awake in his arms wondering if the answer to her parents' letter hadn't been in front of her all along.

center* * * * */center

The bed felt strangely big when Ron woke in the morning. Reaching over to pull Pansy back in close, he realized that she was not only not next to him, the sheets on her side of the bed were cold. His eyes snapped open and confirmed what his hand had already told him. Sitting up so quickly that his head spun, he looked around the room and found her sitting by the fire on the floor wrapped in his Cannon's ragged quilt; the offensive letter still clenched in her hand.

"Is everything okay?" he asked, wondering when she had gotten up.

She turned to look at him. He watched as a soft, beautiful smile grew on her face before she replied, "Not at the moment, but it will be."

He was about to ask what she meant, but instead ended up watching her as she stood up. The soft way she moved as the quilt fell away from her shoulders; revealing his Cannon's kit and nothing else. Ron found himself mesmerized as he could see the calm and peace flow over her as she lightly fingered the letter. He had never seen her more beautiful than in this moment of quiet realization in front of the roaring fire. The warm colours of its wave playing across her face as a single tear rolled down her face.

Ron watched as she laid a gentle kiss on the un-open letter before tossing it into the fire. He knew shock was written over his face but she didn't say a word when she turned to him and smiled brightly: instead she just picked up the quilt and started to make her way back to him. Leaving the quilt at the end of the bed, her glowing hazel eyes never left his as she climbed into bed beside him. Crawling up next to him, she rested on her knees before caressing his face and whispering, "You are my future."

Hearing those words, seeing that smile, and for the first time seeing true and genuine happiness in her eyes, Ron couldn't stop himself from pulling her into a kiss. Because words no longer expressed what his heart felt at seeing her finally at peace.


	71. Scars

**Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter nor do make money.**

* * *

**71. Scars  
**

She stood in front of the full-length mirror.

Looked at her body unmarked but clean from her bath.

She looked at her arms, stretching one out then the next. She then looked at her legs, one then the other before turning around to see the backs. Still half-turned, she eyes started at her butt and moved up to the small of her back.

Turning back, she moved closer to the mirror to get a better view of her neck, then her jaw, and her cheeks.

She studied her eyes. The bold colour the only thing she shared with Callum. An essence flickering in their amber and green colour, something she recognized as sharing with Finny. Steadied by the thought of her longed for brother. She took one more careful look at her eyes before she closed them.

Whispering the words that would remove the glamours.

Holding her breath as the magic caressed her skin. Then holding it a bit longer. Squeezing her eyes a bit tighter and waited.

Slowly, she opened her eyes.

She could still see the spirit she had shared with Finny in spite of the colour she had shared with them both.

She looked at the scar laying jagged across her cheek. The one that skipped along her jaw line. The skims along her neck.

Taking another deep breath, she took a step back and looked at her marked body. The henna-coloured markings that changed the colour of her hands before trailing up her arms and stopping just below the elbows; some of them distorted or destroyed by the puncture scars that littered her arms. Her eyes drifted to the jagged gashes across her stomach and thighs; some how bigger and worse than the one on her face though they were made by the same knife.

Turning she could see the continuation of some of them on the back of her thighs and under the cheeks of her butt.

Sighing, she stepped away from the mirror and started to dress in her uniform: first her undergarments, then a tanktop, then her skirt and socks, next her shirt before tying her tie and slipping on the sweater vest. She slowly stepped into her shoes and pulled her hair up in a pony tail before taking a new look of her in the mirror.

The scars on her legs, face and neck clear to anyone who saw her. Biting her lip, she started to role up her sleeves exposing the scars there on her arms.

Taking one last look at herself, she steadied her growing nerves and headed out of the bathroom to meet Ron so they could go to class.

She was done hiding.


	72. Rebellion

**Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter nor do make money.**

* * *

**72. Rebellion  
**

A moaned "Pansy" caused Theo's eyes to snap open. Even in the darkness of the early morning, he could still Hermione clearly in the shadows. However, this time, she no longer lay still upon her bed but was starting to thrash about.

He bolted from his own bed, hoping to calm her so she would go back to sleep without damaging the bandages that were still helping heal her damaged chest. Leaning over her, he whispered as comforting as possibly, "Pansy's okay. Everything is okay."

But she still thrashed, fighting the images in her head. Theo went to caress her hoping that a comforting touch would help calm her while he continued to tell her that everything was all right. However the moment he touched her, she lashed out and somehow managed to send him flying away from the bed. Resulting him tumbling over backwards the nearby bed before landing on the floor.

He shook off the haze that suddenly overwhelmed him. Getting to his feet, he hurried back over to the bed where she was really starting to thrash. He tentatively touched her face again. This time, nothing happened as she continued to moan and thrash.

"Please Hermione," he softly begged. "Everything is okay. Please Hermione."

Growing braver he started to run his fingers through her curls as he caressed her face trying to calm her, "Hermione, please."

She started to fight him again, trying to get away from him.

"Hermione," he pleaded. "Please, let me take care of you."

Hermione stilled momentarily before starting again. He tried again, "Hermione, let me take care of you. Please. I need you to wake up. Please Hermione. I need you to wake up so I can take care of you."

Theo watched as her body stilled again, he caressed her face and confessed, "Merlin Hermione, I love you. I want you to come back to me. Let me take care of you. Please Hermione."

He didn't know what he expected. He knew it was foolish to think that maybe his declaration would reach her and bring her back to him. Hell, it was bloody stupid to think that she would open those big brown eyes that he missed.

Bowing his head, he rested his forehead on hers and whispered, "I just want you back so bad. I miss you. I miss our time together over the break before I had to go and muck it all up. Hermione, please, please just come back to me. Give me the chance to make it right...just give me a chance."

Theo pulled back and seeing the calmness on her face, his heart fell. The same peace that had been on her face since they brought her to the infirmary. She was gone again.

Feeling a tear fall from his eye, he whispered, "Please just give me a chance to tell you how much I love you," before kissing her on her forehead. Sitting back, he wiped away the stray tear with the sleeve on his pajamas. After placing another gentle kiss on her nose, Theo stood up and made his way to his bed.

Curling up underneath the sheets, he turned to face her. His eyes focused on the calming motion of her breathing; the steady breathes in and out -- a natural lullaby -- as his eyes grew heavy. Looking upon her, he made a wish on the stars he remembered in her eyes, that she would come back soon and give him the chance he didn't deserve.

* * *

The brightening sun caused Theo to stir while proceeding to inhale hair. Wondering how the...as his mind stopped.

Hair.

Opening his eyes, all he could see was the light brown curls he loved on his pillow. He bit his lip hard just to make sure he wasn't dreaming.

He wasn't.

Rolling onto his back, his arm pinned beneath her, he sighed realizing he must have moved over to her bed after falling asleep. He started to chastise himself when he realized that the stain glass with the Hufflepuff symbol wasn't in front of her bed -- it was in front of his.

Rolling back over, he wrapped his arm around her tiny waist and whispered, "I love you."

His eyes wide when he heard her drowsy reply, "I love you too Theo. Now go back to sleep."

He wondered what had killed him overnight because outside of being stuck in Hogwarts, he knew this had to be heaven.


	73. Glory

**Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter nor do make money.**

* * *

**73. Glory  
**

She had **thought** it was going to be a good day. However, she had never been so wrong in her life.

After deciding she was tired of hiding and went out for the first time in her life without a single glamour, breakfast soon became a study in being an animal on display at a Muggle zoo. Everyone was pointing and whispering; mainly behind her back because evidently no one had enough courage to actually do it to her and Ron's face. The bint Romilda Vane came very close to finding herself in the middle of the lake when she wondered quite loudly if one of Pansy's parents had been a dementor; the only reason she didn't was because Ron held Pansy back while Ginny hexed Romilda from the scene.

Then to have the Head Boy tell her that she needed to report straight to the Headmistress' office after breakfast to be interviewed by the Aurors regarding the attack and assault on her and Hermione, she knew she should have stayed in bed. Ron had only been allowed to go with her to the gargoyle that guarded the entrance to the Headmistress' office before he was forced by the Auror guarding the doorway to stay behind as she went up; Pansy got her revenge that time but sealing the Auror's lips shut which made Ron laugh.

Unfortunately those two incidents were nothing to what waited for her in the Headmistress office: not only were there four Aurors there to question her but the Minister himself, the Headmistress and Professor Slughorn. She gritted her teeth and stepped into the light of the circular office, using her best calm and unaffected voice she said, "You asked to see me alone Minister?"

She received no response though as the six people just stared at her.

Waiting for several minutes, she asked, "So may I at least know why you wanted to see me alone? If it was to stare then you could have done that like everyone else did in the Great Hall."

"Ms. Parkinson, what do you think you are doing with those markings?" Headmistress McGonagall sharply asked pointing at her arms.

"I decided I was tired of hiding," she responded with a matter-of-fact tone. "I want the world to see just what Zacharias did to me in the astronomy tower."

"That is not what I am talking about young lady," the Headmistress snapped. "What are you doing drawing those markings on your hands?"

"They aren't drawings Headmistress."

"But you aren't a Weasley," the Minister retorted stepping closer to her.

Looking at him like he had grown a second head, she smiled sweetly and explained, "I beg to differ. As both Headmistress McGonagall and Professor Slughorn could tell you, I am a Weasley now. I married Ron over Christmas hols."

"But..."

Sighing, Pansy interrupted the Minister from going any further, "Why don't we save ourselves a lot of trouble so we can move onto more important issues than me being a Guardian -- summon Arthur Weasley and Lucius Malfoy, they can confirm it."

"They know?"

"Of course they know," Pansy huffed, taking a seat on an available chair. "They were both present when Ron and I were married with the bands." As she waved her right hand, her wedding band glittering in the early morning sun.

She rolled her eyes as they continued to stare at her. Sighing, she asked, "If you are going to stare and try to work this concept out, can Ron at least join me and he can help keep me calm and occupied?"

"Minerva," the Minister said fairly low but Pansy heard him just the same, "this changes everything."

"I know," she whispered back.

"So do you care to explain why me being a Guardian changes everything? I hardly know what it means except the basics."

Pansy waited but no response came in her direction as the Headmistress and the Minister seemed to have a silent conversation while the other five just stood there evidently deaf, dumb and mute. After a few minutes, she tried again, "So are you going to explain what is going on to me or not? I'd hate to get the information, let's just say other ways."

Finally, the Headmistress turned away from Kingsley as he ventured towards the Floo in her office and said, "There are special laws protecting Guardians, Mrs. Weasley."

"And?" Pansy pressed, wanting to know exactly what the Headmistress was eluding too.

"Depending on the statements you and Ms. Granger give regarding the most recent incident, those in combination with you and Mr. Weasley's statement will more than likely cost Mr. Smith his life."

Pansy felt the colour drain out of her face as she leaned back into the chair. She hadn't expected strongthat/strong.

This had to be the worst day of her life.


	74. Prepare

**Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter nor do make money.**

* * *

**74. Prepare**

Pansy didn't know how long she sat there while the stinging realization that Zacharias could pay for what he did to her with his life dulled. However, the ringing in her ears started to swell as the room felt like it was closing in. The thudding in her chest replaced the ringing while her breathing started to quicken.

She couldn't do this.

Bolting from the chair, she tore out of the Headmistress' office. Pansy could hear all forms of her name being called as she hurried down the stairs and out of the doorway.

Ron didn't have a chance to get up completely from where he was sitting on the floor before she launched herself at him, knocking him back to the ground. Wrapping her arms around his neck she clung to him as tears started to flow.

"What happened?" he whispered as he rubbed her back.

"He's going to die."

"Who's going to die?"

"Smith."

Ron said nothing more as he pulled her tighter, but she continued, "All because I wanted a better life than what I had, he's going to die."

"It's not your fault," Ron whispered. "You can't blame yourself."

"But I wanted a better life and I got that because he attacked me," she replied, her voice cracking due to her tears. "It's my fault."

Ron pulled her up and away from his body. His hands going to her face to force her to look at him, and very firmly said, "No, it is not your fault --"

She tried to interrupt him but he continued over her weak protests, "Yes, you wanted a better life. Pansy everyone wants that at some point. So this is not your fault."

"But..."

"Pansy, listen to me. **This** is not your fault."

"Yes..."

She could tell that he was getting frustrated with her but the guilt was so overwhelming. Her eyes watched as he sent his Patronus before turning his attention back to her.

"Is there anything I can say to convince you that this isn't your fault?"

"But it is my fault. I wanted a better life. I got that better life because he attacked me."

"He almost killed you."

"But..."

"No Pansy," he said, his hands going back to her face. "He almost killed you. Hear me say that. Hear me tell you that when I left you in the infirmary that night, I left believing that you wouldn't survive the night. Madame Pomfrey and Headmistress McGonagall too. None us thought you would make it through the night."

The anguish that she saw in his eyes started to tear at her heart. It was the first time, he had actually said anything to her about that night. She had always appreciated that he never forced her to talk about that night but now she wish she had.

"Ron," she whispered, her own anguish evident in the cracking of her voice. Her own hands went to his face, before she leaned forward and rested her forehead against his.

"Mrs. Weasley, we aren't finished," a cool voice interrupted them.

Her eyes didn't leave his as they remained quiet.

"Mrs. Weasley, the Aurors would like to finish questioning you."

She took a deep breath as she whispered his name.

"Mrs. Weasley," the voice said harshly.

Pansy felt a hand go to her shoulder and grip it. Lashing out with a primeval scream, she tore away from Ron spinning. Catching a glimpse of the Auror as he went flying back.

Breathing heavy, she got to her feet as did Ron, who pulled her back into him as she grabbed onto him; pressing her face into his side.

"Mr. Weasley. Mrs. Weasley. Explain yourself." The Headmistress ordered having come down the stairs.

"Actually Headmistress, I think we are owed an explanation," Ron replied coolly. "What the bloody hell is going on?"

"Now Mr. Weasley, we do not have to explain ourselves to you in a criminal matter," Kingsley's booming voice sounded before the man made his entrance.

"No offense Minister, but I think we are. I refuse to standby while you upset her after what she has been through the last few months."

"And you should have informed us of her status of being a Guardian. Seeing as you didn't prepare us, I feel we should not prepare you," Kingsley coolly replied. "As I see it you start talking, and we start talking."

"Fine." Ron snapped. "You, me, her. That's it. Take it or leave it."

"Don't you want to see him punished for what he did to her?"

"Yes I do. But I won't let you destroy her in the process."

"Ron, what is it?" Harry's winded voice sounded.

Pansy watched as Ron kept his eyes leveled with the Minister's as he spoke, "Depends. What is it Minister?"


	75. Mistake

******Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter nor do make money.**

* * *

**Mistake**

"Upstairs now, both of you!" Kingsley's voice thundered through the hallway as he pointed to Ron and Pansy. "Minerva you too."

Ron knew it was his fault that Kingsley had gotten so worked up. He also knew deep down, he didn't have the right to demand what he had but he had to make the effort for Pansy's sake. The amount of guilt that he saw in her eyes at just the thought of Smith being executed for what he did to her, tore at his heart strings. No doubt, he was confused at the evaporation of the anger he had seen when he had pulled her off him in the library but this wasn't the time nor the place to bring it up.

Following the Minister up the stairs, Ron thought he was going to have to carry Pansy as much as he was dragging her up the stairs behind Kingsley and the Headmistress.

They had barely entered the room when Kingsley spun on them and angrily said, "You have no right to obstruct this investigation, . The law is the law, especially with Guardians."

Ron found himself not ready to give up the fight yet and retorted, "You'd be the last person I thought would lecture me about what's right and what's wrong in terms of black and white Kingsley. A little case regarding Sirius Black comes to mind. I'll have you know that I'm not some foolish, naive boy anymore and you would be greatly mistaken, if you think I'm going to stand idly by and let you brow beat me into submission in order to harass my wife who has been through enough this year."

"Ron, I hate to inform you but it _is_ black and white when it comes to Guardians though the laws haven't actually been applied to any case in five-hundred years."

"And you would never have known if she wasn't tired of hiding. Smith didn't know when he attacked her. No one knew."

"So when did you find out?"

"The day we got married."

Kingsley face flooded with confusion before turning to Pansy and asking, "When did you learn you were a Guardian?"

"The day we got married," she whispered, clinging tighter to Ron.

"Excuse me?" Kingsley and the Headmistress shouted at the same time. Headmistress McGonagall continued, "How could you not have known?"

Carefully and timidly, Pansy responded, "I've known about the marks all my life but I was under strict orders to hide them by my nanny until a Weasley asked to see my hands."

"And who asked you specifically?" Kingsley growled, his eyes containing that look that screamed heads were going to roll once he got to the bottom of this.

Ron retorted, "My father did."

"And how did he know?" Kingsley's voice becoming increasingly sinister.

Ron didn't have a chance to respond before Pansy spoke up softly, "Because of a prophesy Minister. Ron's grandfather was told that the longed for daughter would sacrifice her own blood for her chosen blood."

"And what does that have to do with you Mrs. Weasley?" Kingsley asked, clearly confused by Pansy's statement.

Barely louder than a whisper, Pansy said, "Because I killed Callum to save Charlie Weasley."

Ron watched as every ounce of air escaped both the Minister and the Headmistress while the Minister proceeded to collapse against the desk and the Headmistress into her chair.

Shaking his head, Kingsley softly said, "I knew Herrod's and Lucius' explanation was too clean. What happened to Finny that night Pansy?"

"Callum killed him," she whispered.

"Herrod didn't say anything about Charlie being there."

"He didn't know," Pansy replied. "I got Charlie out of there before they arrived."

"And Lucius?"

"He just saved me Minister."

A heavy silence fell over the office while both adults rubbed their faces and sighed. Ron wasn't sure how long he stood there holding onto Pansy while they waited from some verbal response from either one of the adults.

Finally, the Headmistress said with a heavy sight, "Go to your quarters. I'll be up there shortly."

"As will I," Kingsley added as soon as the pair reached the top step that would lead them out of the office.


	76. Restless

**Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter nor do make money.**

* * *

**Restless**

Pansy wouldn't stop pacing.

No matter what Ron did. Regardless of the number of times he asked her to stop. Or simply, physically restrained her when she got close enough for him to grab her.

Then for ten minutes, he would get a moment's peace as she curled up on his lap and let him hold her before starting to squirm. When he would let go, she would bound out of his lap only to start pacing again.

He was about at his wits end with her when a knock on their door finally brought her most recent round of pacing to a halt. When the door actually opened, she ran back towards him as he stood up. She had firmly wrapped her arms around him when not only did Kingsley and the Headmistress enter the room but also his father and Charlie, Lucius Malfoy, Herrod Parkinson and two other people that Ron didn't recognize but assumed them to be from the Ministry by the colour of their robes.

"Mr. and Mrs. Weasley, I believe you know everyone except Bartholomew Digsby with the Department of Mysteries and Nicholas Merrill with the Department of Magical Law Enforcement," Kingsley's booming voice filled the room.

Ron just nodded his head in response to the introduction but didn't say anything as Pansy clung tighter to his side.

Kingsley continued, "Mrs. Weasley, Mr. Digsby needs to examine your hands to officially verify for the Ministry that you are a Guardian."

Looking down towards Pansy, he watched as she merely stretched out her hands but didn't leave his side. He brought his arm down from around her shoulders and placed his hand against the small of her back and gave her a gentle shove forward but she simply refused too.

Sighing, he turned and watched as Mr. Digsby, a round man in his sixties with salt and pepper hair, move towards where Pansy stood. Ron's eyes remained on him as he fought the urge to wrap his arm around her again.

"Mrs. Weasley, I promise I don't bite," Mr. Digsby said gently. "May I touch your hands?"

Pansy nodded.

Ron watched as he examined her hands carefully, outlining the various markings before flipping them over.

After a few minutes, Mr. Digsby asked gently, "Has anyone explained these markings to you?"

"No sir," she replied timidly. Ron would have been surprised if anyone outside of himself and Mr. Digsby heard her.

"Well how about I visit with you and your husband sometime next week and we can discuss this more fully?"

"I would like that very much sir," Pansy replied softly but with a smile that warmed Ron's heart. He was glad to see her trust enough to even consider meeting with him.

"Very well. I will call on you two next weeks," Mr. Digsby replied before turning to the others in the room and announcing, "It is confirmed. Pansy Weasley is a Guardian."

"I'm sorry Mrs. Weasley but Zacharias Smith with face death for his crimes committed against you," Kingsley sighed. "I know that is not what you want but the laws regarding the protection of Guardians is quite clear. But I guess the more important issue we all need to discuss is what actually occurred the night that Callum and Phineas "Finny" Parkinson died."

Ron felt Pansy begin to shake. He quickly pulled her back into his body and wrapping his arm around her. Kissing her on the top of her head, he whispered, "Everything will be okay."

Kingsley continued, "Seeing as we have no other witnesses to the night's events, Mrs. Weasley, you and Mr. Charlie Weasley will need to give us your memories of the night in question."

The only sound in the room was the sound of Ron catching Pansy as they fell to the floor, due to her fainting.


	77. Orange

**Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter nor do make money.**

* * *

__** Orange**

_Charlie's Memory_

"Are you sure you want to do this?"

"Charlie, we have to. I refuse to keep what I have with you from my family. They know I'm seeing someone. They know that it's one of my classmates, and I want them to know the person I am seeing. And whether either one of us like it or not, Callum is my brother and I'm telling him first; then we will tell my parents."

"Finny, why don't we just wait until after graduation?" Charlie asked desperately, pulling Finny back to him. "We can tell them as soon as we get to Egypt. Put enough distance between them and us."

"No Charlie, I love you. I'm not going to hide you from..."

"Finny don't be daft," Charlie fussed, interrupting him. "This is Callum we are talking about. We are talking about the guy who beat the tar out of Rookwood for simply tracking mud into their room. The guy who hexed Louise Abbott unconscious for two weeks for simply knocking over his ink well. The guy who..."

"But I'm his brother. His twin."

"And it didn't stop him for putting you in St. Mungo's for three weeks for accidentally charming his face green two years ago!"

Charlie was breathing heavy as he watched Finny start to shake at the simple memory of the hex that almost disemboweled him. The fear in Charlie's chest started to thump as he watched Finny shake his head and calmly reply, "I can't run from Callum forever. No matter how much I want to; Father will force the issue at some point or the other. And we shouldn't have to hid because Callum can't be bothered to be a decent human being."

Charlie didn't move as Finny began to move. Realizing that Charlie wasn't behind him, Finny turned and asked, "Are you coming or not?"

He wanted to say no or at least something but he couldn't. His heart and stomach were caught in his throat. Instead, he just nodded and then moved to follow Finny as Finny stepped into the very pit of hell - otherwise known as the bedroom suite of Callum McDuff Parkinson in the Parkinson Estate. His ears filling with the thudding of his heart.

Slowly entering the devil's chambers, he saw Finny and Callum arguing.

Then he saw the end of his world as he realized he forgot to kiss Finny one more time and tell him how much he loved him as a burst of orange, red, and gold flames around Finny. Dancing around him, his screams replacing the thudding of Charlie's heart as they consumed the only man he would ever love.

Charlie tried to move to Finny but he was thrown back landing with a solid thud against the floor.

When he tried to scream, a stabbing pain filled chest.

He heard Callum hiss something but he couldn't make out the words as he started to choke on the blood. Opening his eyes, he saw Pansy standing in the door. Her eyes glowing. He tried to tell her to save herself but he watched as she threw herself towards Callum with green shooting from her hands...

_Pansy's Memory_

She knew she heard Finny and Charlie's voices. She couldn't believe that they came to the Estate but didn't come to say 'hi' to her first. Especially since she hadn't gotten to she her favorite brother and his former best friend and now his boyfriend since Christmas hols and they would be graduation soon and going to join Charlie's brother in Egypt.

It didn't take long for her to find their voices but she couldn't understand why they were in the hall leading to Callum's rooms. Running down the hall, she wanted to stop them from getting too close to the person she had started avoiding at three when he cut up her arm for even stepping in his rooms. She didn't get far before a piercing shriek sung in her ears. Moving as fast as her ten year old legs could take her, she barrelled into Callum's room for the first time in seven years.

Her mouth sounded a silent scream as she saw Finny encased in red, orange, and gold flames as he fell to the ground and Charlie bleeding profusely from his chest. Callum's maniacal laugh brought her back as he cackled, "What did I tell you dear sister about coming into my room?" as he drew closer to Charlie.

Pansy watched as he raised his wand to point it at Charlie as he snidely said, "I told you to stay away from Finny you poof. Now he has paid and you will too."

Out of the corner of her eye, she saw movement from Charlie. Darting her eyes, he saw his brown ones staring back at her.

Looking back at Callum she saw his wand start to move, instinctively she charged him, hands raised as she yelled, "No."

Callum's eyes widened before green light shot out from her hands. Her feet and body came to an abrupt halt as Callum fell over his eyes wide and unmoving. Looking over at Finny's burned body she saw that Callum was as still as Finny now.

She had killed her brother.

"Pansy," a week, choking voice caused her to turn back towards Charlie. Seeing the blood continue to spill from his chest and his mouth, she rushed to him as he whispered, "I'm sorry kiddo..."

She threw herself towards the only person left in the world who could protect her and cried, "No. No. NO. Finny's gone. Callum's dead. I didn't kill him to loose you too."

"Mistress Pansy!"

Pansy looked up to see her nanny staring at her with her bright, bulbous eyes.

"Help me, please!" she pleaded. "I have to get him help."

She watched her nanny's eyes water and whisper, "But you have Mistress Pansy. You have."

Shocked and confused, she looked back down to Charlie only to find the bleeding to have stopped; colour having returned to his face. She had to get him out of here.

"Mistress Pansy, Flopsy will take him to Hogwarts," another voice chirped. Looking up she saw Finny's house-elf standing by her nanny.

"Thank you!" she cried.

Flopsy and Charlie hadn't been gone ten seconds when her father came barrelling in with Mr. Malfoy on his heels, his baritone voice booming, "What have you done?"

"I've done nothing," she screamed as a green light filled the room again.


	78. Beginnings

**Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter nor do make money.**

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**Beginnings**

"Where is the rest of your memory, Mrs. Weasley?"

Quietly, her eyes on her father, she replied, "That's all I remember Minister."

"Are you sure?"

"It's been nine years sir. You are lucky I remember that much, given my favorite brother was killed and I killed his twin," Pansy retorted, still clinging to Ron.

"Mr. Parkinson, how about you fill us in from there?"

"Minister," Lucius Malfoy's cool drawl interrupted Herrod Parkinson before he could even try to start his attempt to talk his way around his attempt to kill his daughter that night. "I do believe that and Mr. Charlie Weasley's memories should suffice to answer you question as they are germane to the question of did Mrs. Weasley kill Mr. Callum Parkinson nine years ago in not only self-defense but to protect Mr. Charlie Weasley and I believe the answer is yes."

The entire room turned to Kingsley for his own conclusion who now remained silent.

And he continued to be mute for several minutes before Charlie spoke up, "Minister, please put an end to this. Give Pansy a chance at the beginning she now has available to her. It is safe to say that Callum would have probably killed her after he finished with me, if she hadn't killed him first."

"Mr. Weasley, I appreciate your concern and candor, but it is not that easy..."

"But it can be." All eyes turned wide-eyed to look at Mr. Parkinson. "I did a lot wrong by favoring Callum as I did and it cost me my son and my daughter. As the father of Callum, Finny and Pansy, I'm asking you to let the matter to stay closed. Giver her a chance at a life I denied her over and over again."

After a few more tense minutes, Kingsley finally sighed, "If Mr. Merrill is okay with it, it will be reflected that Callum Parkinson killed Finny Parkinson and attempted to murder Charlie Weasley. It will also be shown that Pansy Weasley nee Parkinson killed Callum Parkinson in defense of Charlie Weasley and herself. Is that agreeable to you Mr. Merrill?"

"Yes Minister. I will file the appropriate paperwork when I return to the Ministry."

"Good. Mrs. Weasley," Kingsley said, turning back to Pansy. "The Aurors will still want to question you regarding Mr. Smith. Please report to the Headmistress' office at nine in the morning tomorrow to finish what we didn't get today."

"Yes sir," she replied with a nod. "I would like if Ron was there."

"That is fine," Kingsley said as he opened the door. "I will let the Aurors know that it is okay if he is present."

"Thank you sir."

Pansy clung to Ron as they watched the Ministry officials and the Headmistress leave.

Arthur would be next as he gave them both hugs and told them, "If you need anything from me or Molly, just Owl us."

"We promise," the both intoned as Mr. Malfoy approached and said, "The same for me, if you two should need something, please feel free to contact me or Narcissa."

"Thank you Mr. Malfoy," Pansy softly said.

"I'm sorry I failed you Pansy. Both your mother and I are," her father finally spoke as Arthur and Lucius started out of Ron and Pansy's quarters. "Much like we failed Finny, Charlie. As we said in our letter, we don't expect you to ever forgive us but maybe someday you will give us a chance."

Pansy wanted to say something but she was sure what. However, the tears in her eyes choked her, leaving her to just nod. Her father gave her a knowing, soft smile and headed out the door with Arthur and Lucius on his footsteps.

Once the fathers had left, Pansy ran to Charlie and hugged him, crying, "I'm so sorry Charlie."

"Me too kiddo," he whispered back. "But if you two find you need to get away from here after everything is said and done, my house is open and I'm sure I can find work for both of you on the reservation."

"Thank you," she whispered, hugging him again before letting him go. Standing back, she whispered, "I know Finny would want you happy and to stop mourning him."

"I know," he whispered back, kissing her on the forehead. "It's just some of us don't want a new beginning kiddo."


	79. Sickness

**Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter nor do make money.**

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**Sickness**

Pansy was tired.

More specifically she was tired of being sick and tired.

Ron had been so sweet about holding her hair as she heaved morning, noon, and night. There had been a particularly nasty bug circulating Hogwarts over the course of the last two weeks and Pansy just had to come down with it during the stress that followed Smith's last attack and Minister's questioning. The only thing was that Ron had only had to suffer with it for a few days but she was going on nearly a week of it.

Finally fed up with being sick and tired as well as Ron's nagging, she made her way to the infirmary with Ron was in Defense Against the Dark Arts.

She quickly and quietly slipped past Ginny who was chatting animatedly with Hermione; she wanted to say thanks to Hermione and talk to her but at the moment, she just wasn't up to it. Pansy just wanted to see Madame Pomfrey, swallow some of that Pepper-Up potion she hated and go back to her room.

Keeping her he head down, she made her way through the throng of students leaving Madame Pomfrey's office with the tale-tell signs of that blasted Pepper-Up potion.

"You too Mrs. Weasley?" Madame Pomfrey said cheerfully; too cheerfully for Pansy's liking as the woman sent away what looked like a first year student.

"Unfortunately," she sighed. "Ron had it but it went away while mine keeps dragging on."

"How long have you been sick?"

Pansy didn't like the concern look on Madame Pomfrey's face; it frankly made her nervous having been around the woman constantly after the initial attack. Looking down at her feet, she sheepishly admitted, "Going on a week."

"How long Mrs. Weasley?"

Sighing, she finally admitted the truth to herself out loud, "A little over a week."

"And you are just _now_ coming to see me?"

"I know," Pansy replied, fully chastised and still more interested in her feet than Madame Pomfrey.

"Well have a seat. You have something else then what's been going on."

Pansy groaned but complied; because anything would be better than vomiting and nauseated all hours of the day. Hating to actually watch diagnostic spells, she closed her eyes and leaned back to wait for Madame Pomfrey to tell her what was wrong and still pour Pepper-Up potion down her throat.

She did not however, expect to hear Madame Pomfrey gasp. Instinctively, her eyes shot open as she brought herself up on her elbows.

It didn't take an idiot to recognize what the scan diagnosed was wrong with her. In fact there was nothing wrong with her - she was pregnant.

So Pansy did what any normal witch would do in her situation: she fainted.


	80. Thanks

**Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter nor do make money.**

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**Thanks**

"What did Madame Pomfrey say? Ginny said, she and Hermione tried to ask you but just passed them by. They said you were in a bit of a daze."

Taking a deep breath, she looked over towards Ron's voice. She had planned to skip Charms in order to figure out how to break it to Ron that though they weren't twenty yet, they were going to be parents before the end of the year. Evidently, he planned to skip Charms too. She just wished that she had noticed Ginny and Hermione earlier.

"What's going on?" he asked concerned, moving towards where she sat curled up in a tiny ball looking out onto the country side. "Is it something other than the bug going around?"

"Yes," she said, turning to look back outside unable to look at him. Closing her eyes, she took another deep breath before saying, "I'm pregnant." She wasn't sure she even said it loud enough for him to hear.

After several very quite minutes, figuring he hadn't heard her, she said louder, "I'm pregnant."

"I heard you."

She sat up and quickly turned her head to look at him. He still stood where she had last seen him; before turning her head to tell him her news. The look on his face, she wasn't sure if it was a good thing or a bad thing - there was so much shock registered there.

"Ron?" she tentatively spoke. She knew she should say something else but for the life of her she couldn't figure out what it was.

"A baby?" he whispered, his voice still managing to crack over three syllables.

Tears welled up in her eyes as she nodded her head. She knew she had been dreaming of red-headed children since the moment she realized that she was absolutely, positively in love with him; however, with the heir charm, the pragmatic side of her had convinced her heart that they had been foolish dreams no matter how much comfort they had brought her.

"Really?"

She nodded her head again. Noticing his eyes were red and watery too, she got to her feet hoping that after the initial shock that this would be good news to him again.

"Our wedding night," she whispered, wiping at the tears that were starting to escape her eyes. "Ron..."

Pansy didn't have a chance to finish what she was going to say before she found herself wrapped up in his arms. Burying her face into his neck as she wrapped her own body around his, she tentatively asked, "So this is good news?"

"This is great news love," he whispered. "And after the shock wears off and I stop thanking every deity I can think of, I'm going to take you to bed and thank you properly."

"Ron," she moaned, kissing his neck.

"Yes love?"

"Thank you."

"For what?"

"For everything," she whispered pulling back to look him in the eyes. It took her a moment to continue as she lost herself in his blue eyes as he pushed her hair back. After kissing him on the lips she gently, she softly said, "But for making my dreams come true: you've given me a family."


	81. Air

**Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter nor do make money.**

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**Air**

"Hey."

"Where's Pansy?"

"Is she okay?"

"She didn't look well when she was in the infirmary earlier..."

"What do you mean she was in the infirmary?"

"How come no one told me?"

"I thought you knew."

"Now why would I know."

"I don't know."

"Then why..."

"Enough," Ron sighed taking a seat. The air he had been walking on disappeared. "She's okay, just tired. She was taking a nap and I didn't want to wake her."

"But she is okay?"

"Right?"

"She just seemed..."

"She's fine," he said firmer this time, filling up his plate. Suddenly regretting coming here for dinner instead of just running to the kitchen. "She's just tired."

"She just didn't look fine."

"Leave it Hermione," Ron snapped, causing everyone's eyes to widen except hers which watered. Feeling bad, he sighed and said again, "I promise you she is fine. She is just tired. It's nothing."

"Then why don't you tell..."

"Merlin's tits, Ginny! What did I just say?" Ron yelled, throwing his silverware down. "Pansy is fine."

"You don't have to yell."

"Really mate."

"We are just worried."

"And I appreciate it," Ron sighed. "But you need to let this go. She is fine. Just tired."

"You'd tell us right?"

"If something was going on?"

"You don't have to do this by yourself."

"I can't do this," Ron replied exasperated. "I appreciate all the concern and worry. So does Pansy but not everything that happens to us is bad, or going to be bad."

Standing up, he grabbed his full plate and walked out of the Great Hall to:

"Ron."

"Weasley."

"Wait."

"Weasel stop."

"Ron."


	82. Doors

**Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter nor do make money.**

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**Doors**

Pansy stood in front of the wooden door. Unspeakable Digsby was behind that door with the answers he promised her - she just wasn't sure if she wanted the answers anymore. Or if they were even necessary.

The part of her that had wanted answers had disappeared since finding out that she was pregnant. Suddenly answers to the markings on her hands or just what she could and couldn't do didn't matter anymore. Because in seven months time, she was going to be someone's mother; another someone who would love her and not care about the markings - someone she prayed about every night would have Ron's red hair.

"You know love," Ron's gentle voice teased her from behind, moments before he wrapped her up in his arms, "Most people walk through doors and not stare at them."

"I know," she whispered, falling back into the safety, security and warmth she knew to be there. "I just don't think I want answers anymore."

"Why not?" he asked, kissing the top of her head.

Closing her eyes, she turned her head into the crook of his shoulder and whispered, "I don't think it matters anymore."

"Why?"

"You love me right?"

"Of course I do," he fervently whispered, kissing her head. "What does that..."

"And you don't care."

"No." She could hear the confusion in his voice but the truthfulness in the conviction of the simple answer told her all she needed to know.

Pansy turned into his body and buried her face into the kit he wore and whispered, "If it doesn't matter to me, and it doesn't matter to you. Why do we need answers?"

He didn't say anything as he held her for several minutes. Finally, he pulled her away from his body, looking down he asked, "Are you sure?"

"Now. Yes." She replied firmly, nodding her head; silently pleading with him to accept her choice.

"Are you absolutely positively sure?" Pansy could see the concern in his bright blue eyes. He was only asking to make sure she was doing this for herself and no one else.

"I'm absolutely positively sure," she whispered. "If I change my mind, I can always go to the Ministry and ask."

"Okay," he said pulling her back in towards his body. Kissing her forehead, he continued, "Let me go talk to Unspeakable Digsby and then we can head up to our rooms."

She bit both her lips and nodded, moments before he stepped around her and disappeared behind the doors. Softly smiling, as her eyes watched the now closed doors, she wondered what she ever did to deserve a man like Ron.


	83. Bias

**Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter nor do make money.**

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**Bias**

First, it was the newspapers – especially _The Daily Prophet_ as people raised their voices in anger, hurt and desperation of why Pansy's case should be treated as special, her rapist facing the death penalty when their own daughters, girlfriends, fiancées, sisters, friends would not be allowed the same justice.

Then the howlers started arriving – every professor and all of their friends desperately attempting to attend to them in order to protect not only Pansy who was growing more fragile in front of their eyes everyday but also Ron who was struggling to keep it together enough to keep Pansy together.

The stress of watching Pansy continue to lose weight when she had no business doing so in the first place only added to his own stress because Madame Pomfrey had finally given up in trying to get through to Pansy and had started in on Ron; cajoling him into making her take care of herself.

But there was only so much he could do when students at Hogwarts started adding their own opinions in the form of whispers in the Great Hall, the halls outside the classrooms, the classrooms themselves, and the library. He had to stand there and watch the Pansy he thought had finally disappear start to return slowly: first refusing to be anywhere that Ron wasn't, then walking so close to him that he found himself tripping over his own feet as well as hers, to clinging to his hand and finally his sleeve.

However, in spite of everything that had been building to this moment, what hurt the worst was the morning when he emerged from the bathroom ready for class and Pansy was dressed, not in her uniform, but her favourite pair of jeans and his Cannons' Quidditch kit. Kneeling in front of her, he pushed her hair out of her face and lifted her chin. The evidence of her tears broke his heart even before she whispered, "I'm sorry Ron. I can't do this. I can't stand the whispers anymore."


	84. Waves

**Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter nor do make money.**

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Waves

_A/N: This piece is tied directly to the piece 'Bias'. You will see what I mean by the end._

Her life had become a series of waves. And she hated it.

There was the nausea. It would overwhelm her in the morning, only to subside by lunch and flare back up in the evening – most days. Other days, she woke up fine and the day went down hill from there and other days it was the opposite and still other it was a combination of them all.

There was the comments. The lies, the half-truths regarding why her case was different – all dominated by the anger in the hurt in the voices that sounded them. Each one further pulling at her emotions, pushing her into herself; sending so many emotions coursing through her regularly in the form of mood swings until she realized that she was about to drown amongst the ebbs and flows.

The worst part was that she probably could have handled her erratic mood swings, her guilt was causing as well as the stress of the trial, if she wasn't so tired all the time. Her exhaustion just seemed to make everything she was feeling ten times worse – which in turn killed her appetite. Her decreased appetite only made Ron's good-nature hovering worse and that only led to her feeling more guilty until...

She stopped fighting everything.

One morning, while Ron was getting ready for classes in the restroom, she stopped midway through putting on her own uniform, she came to the conclusion to just stop. Stop everything.

So, instead of finishing putting on her uniform, she put on her favourite jeans that probably only fit because of the weight loss and her pilfered Cannon's kit and sat back down on the bed. She was able to keep the tears at bay until Ron knelt in front of her.

When she lifted her head at his hand's insistence, she met his bright blue eyes full of concern as he pushed back her hair. Her tears finally started to slip from their base as she whispered. "I'm sorry Ron. I can't do this. I can't stand the whispers."

He was quiet for several minutes as they continued their conversation with only their eyes and not their words. After she flung herself into his arms, she heard him whisper, "What do you want to do?"

Surprised that she even had an answer as she hadn't even thought about what she wanted to do now, she knew that the one on the tip of her tongue was the right answer for them: for her Ron, and their child. Pulling back, she met his eyes and whispered, "Can we take Charlie up on his offer and go to the Reserve?"

"Are you sure?"

"Positive, only if you are."

Ron kissed her on her forehead before replying, "I'll owl him today. I'm tired of bloody old England too."


	85. Stray

**Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter nor do make money.**

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**Stray**

Ron couldn't believe he had managed to convince Pansy to join him and the others for a free Saturday in Hogsmeade. She had really been shutting everyone but him out as he made arrangements for them to join Charlie in Romania after the trial; though he hadn't let her in on that part, she assumed he was making arrangements for them to move out there after graduation. But the longer he found himself stuck at Hogwarts with her so unhappy, the more anxious he was to get them both moved away from here.

He had to admit that since she had made the suggestion of them moving to Romania, a weight he hadn't realized had been pushing down on him had disappeared. However, more importantly, her appetite had finally made a consistent return. She looked healthier now than she had been and Madame Pomfrey was finally happy enough with her weight to leave the both of them alone.

Squeezing Pansy's hand to show his affection for her, he found himself rewarded with a beautiful smile from her. He wrapped his arm around her and pulled her closer to kiss her on the forehead.

"Hey you two, knock it off," Harry joked, "You are making the rest of us look bad."

"Maybe you should just take notes, right Ginny?" Hermione teased back, her hand firmly in Theo's.

"And maybe Ron should take notes from us, huh Theo?" Harry playfully snapped back.

"Leave me out of this," Theo retorted, letting go of Hermione's hand only to raise his hands in mock surrender before taking her hand again.

Ron just rolled his eyes as Hermione and Harry carried on as their better-halves appeared powerless to stop the sibling-esque squabbling their banter had descended into.

Ron was about to say something to that regard to Pansy when she abruptly pulled away from him and started towards of the nearby alley by Honeydukes. Ron called out her name sever times but she didn't answer. Concerned, he started to follow her until she knelt by the corner of the store. When she stood up moments later, he could see she was now cradling a shaking ball of white fuzz.

A bloody kitten.

Wiping his face in exasperation at the prospect of another cat in his life, he sighed and said, "I guess this means you want to keep it?"

He wanted to kick himself when her eyes widened in surprise – of course, he hadn't thought about _that_ as a possibility until he had to go and bring it up himself.

"Can I?" she whispered. "I've always wanted a cat but Mother and Father..."

There was no way he could tell her no now, after hearing her voice trail off. Sighing, he just said, "Why not? But let's go have Hagrid look at it first."

"Sucker!" he heard Ginny call out in the distance.

Turning to face his bratty sister, he gave her the two finger salute before wrapping his arm around his wife and starting the track back towards Hogwarts.

Her little 'thank you'' hours later made it all better...at least until Sugar claimed his favourite quill as her new play toy.


	86. Flying

**Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter nor do make money.**

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**Flying**

If Ron had been walking on air after Pansy told him that they were going to be parents; that he was going to be a father; that the heir charm's intentions had been circumvented - then he was definitely flying now. Charlie's letter firmly in his hand (more like wadded up in his hand in actuality), Ron ran all the way up several flights of stairs in order to share his good news with Pansy.

He finally found her on their bed reading while she distractedly played with Sugar by dangling a stuffed mouse in front of her by a string. Closing the door, he bounded onto the bed causing her to squeak in surprise.

"Merlin, Ron," she further squeaked. However, she was unable to fuss any further at him because he captured her lips with a searing kiss.

It didn't take long before she started to respond to his insistent kisses. He pushed her book aside as he came to lie beside her as their lips remained connected. Slowly, Ron's hands started to graze along Pansy's hips and sides; her muffled moans sending him further into orbit as his hand came to rest on her thicker waist, which reminded him why he had come running into their room in the first place instead of joining Harry and Ginny on the Quidditch pitch.

Regretfully, he pulled away from her and smiled at the whimper she uttered, her eyes open and pleading, full of desire.

"I heard from Charlie," he said, caressing her face. "Actually great news."

"What?" she replied excitedly, sitting up though her eyes remained locked with his.

"He found a position in the main office for me," Ron started; he knew his smile was growing bigger with every word. "And the best part of the position is, is they don't care if I have my NEWTS or not."

He watched gleefully as Pansy's mouth started to flap as she stuttered trying to form a sentence. Laughing, he shut her up again with a quick kiss, before continuing, "Yes love, if you don't mind living with Charlie, we can leave for Romania as soon as the trial is over."

Ron didn't know what happened or even how it happened but somehow he found himself on his back laughing while his beautiful happy wife straddled his lap. Seeing her so happy, his laughter trailed off as he realized he had never seen her this happy before - he just hoped that this was only the beginning of many more of these smiles.

Pulling up to rest on his elbows, he whispered, "Kiss me love."

"I love you," she whispered before she did much more than just kiss him.


	87. Overwhelmed

**Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter nor do make money.**

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**Overwhelmed**

Pansy and Ron both knew they should feel overwhelmed by all the plans they were making on their own with only Charlie's assistance as he had been sworn to secrecy. It wasn't that they didn't want their friends' help, it was more like they wanted to take this first step on their own together – making plans, setting courses independent of everyone else's opinions or help. They loved and cared for each and everyone of them but this needed to be about them and their family and their future.

The packing and the shipping of their belongings started slowly with the things that Pansy's parents had allowed her to finally retrieve from her childhood bedroom. Ron hadn't been able to retrieve what he wanted from his yet without bringing their family into their plans, so they had settled on him retrieving everything he wanted a few months after their move. They had managed to get most of their room packed and shipped to Charlie which frankly ended up taking more luck than either wanted to admit along with some fancy charm work on Pansy's part. And neither wanted to talk about how they managed to get Sugar, in one piece, to Charlie anytime soon.

All that was left was a few books, and some clothing that they planned to take with them the day the verdict was read and depart from Romania from there.

But as they stood in their dress robes moments before they were supposed to leave, holding on to one another as tightly as possible, they suddenly felt overwhelmed by the week they had to come.

Only the promise of a quieter life away from England gave them the strength to leave the sanctuary  
of their room and hurry to the awaiting Portkey hand in hand.


	88. Stupidity

**Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter nor do make money.**

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**Stupidity**

Everyone had presented her the option of leaving the courtroom when her memory of the first attack was to be played for the Wizengamot. However, she told them that she would be fine; she wasn't about to let Smith beat her again. She wanted to show him that he hadn't destroyed her yet and she wasn't about to let him. She was going to prove to him, he was no longer the daemon that haunted her at night; that he hadn't destroyed her as everyone else watched just what that bastard did to her.

However, she hadn't taken into account how watching Ron's memory of finding her would affect her. As the scene played out in front of her, she wondered how she could be so stupid; in horror she watched her own hand bloody falling into the moonlight; the blood gurgling from her mouth; the bruises and cuts marring her face; her uniform torn to reveal more cuts, and bruising. So much blood and so much colour on her normally pale skin.

Desperately, she turned into Ron, burying her head into his robes as they muffled her tears.


	89. Haze

**Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter nor do make money.**

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**Haze**

Pansy had no idea which was was up or down; or for that matter what was left or right. A haze had not only settled in her eyes and a buzz in her ears but a fog had come to rest in her mind. She blindly got to her feet at someone's insistence before dutifully following them outside the courtroom during a much needed recess for all there who had just witnessed both disturbing memories.

"Are you okay?" a voice softly rolled through the fog. She looked in the direction of the voice but her eyes couldn't see and her mind couldn't comprehend just what they beheld.

"Pansy," the voice whispered as a hand stroked her face gently. "Pansy, love – are you okay?"

"What?" she choked out, blinking her eyes rapidly trying to desperately push the haze aside.

"Love, are you okay?"

Finally, Ron's concerned face came into view. She nodded her head and whispered, "I'm sorry, watching your memory was harder than I thought."

"My memory?" Ron asked, clearly taken back y her answer.

'Yes," she said, moving closer into him until her body could feel the one that made her's whole. "It hurt to see what you saw that night."

Ron's arms came to wrap around her and squeeze. She softly smiled as she buried her head into his robes; the simple comfort he provided her soul – for he was the piece to her puzzle.

Feeling his lips against her hair, she whispered, "Thank you."

"Why?" he replied as his hands started to rub her back. "We were so worried about you having to see your memory again, that we never considered that anything else would bother you. I should have thought about that and taken you out of the courtroom."

"Ron, even I didn't think it would be an issue," she replied, pulling back after a few minutes of silence before continuing, "After everything we've been through I appreciate you wanting to protect me but you can't protect me from everything that goes bump in the night."

"I know," he sighed, still rubbing her back. "It just doesn't make it easier, or that I'm going to stop trying too."

"I know," was all she could think to say at that moment. Raising up on her toes, she gently placed a kiss on his lips before she whispered, "Partners?"

"Partners."

She softly smiled at her other half before she stole another kiss as if to seal the deal.


	90. Incomplete

******Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter nor do make money.**

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**Incomplete**

She didn't tell anyone. Not even Ron.

But she sat there in the courtroom hanging onto every pause, image, word, sentence; watching, waiting for a sign, a clue as to why.

Why her?  
Why that night?  
Why? Why? Why?

However, with every second, minute, hour, day that passed in the courtroom she couldn't find _an_ answer, let alone _the _answer.

She didn't think she was asking for all that much.

As her searching became more desperate, she convinced herself that a simple 'because' would even suffice. At least it was an answer, not a great one, or a good or, or even and adequate one but it was one – even if it suited more for a child who broke their sibling's toy than for a young man's vocalized reasons for why he would attack and almost kill a classmate.

Pansy would close her eyes and sigh as the trial would switch from witness to witness, expert to expert while the disappointment and incompleteness wheeling inside her kept growing and growing in her mind. And as the those feelings manifested, she kept trying to convince herself that she didn't need an answer; that she almost didn't have a right to an answer since in a twisted way through her magic she had brought this on herself. But even the self-deprecation would remind her that though it may have been her fault, she did still need to hear why he chose to do what he did; why did he choose her; choose that night; and on that night, why did he chose to almost kill her.

Even more than that her mind, spirit and soul needed to know why he used an heir charm? Why if he tried to kill her the first time, why did he plan to bond her to him through a child the second and the third?

If she wasn't good enough to live in September, then why was she good enough to marry and carry his child by November?

But as the trial stretched into a third day, Pansy was no closer to an answer to her repeated whys then she was the day she work up in the infirmary with Ron by her side.


	91. Vengeance

******Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter nor do make money.**

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**Vengeance**

Then the very thing she thought she wasn't to get happened.

She finally had her answer to all the silent 'whys' that kept circling in her head – however, she now wished it had never happened.

For it all boiled down to one word – vengeance.

And she barely knew he existed.

Every word that formulated Smith's Veritaserum-driven explanation drove a stake further into her heart. Listening to him say that she hadn't been the sole target – not in the beginning – only the first, because she had spurned all his advance and done so each time cruelly.

Hearing him detail his plans to one-by-one destroy every Pureblood female in the school – the ones he believed he deserved as a Pureblood from not only an old Wizarding family but one that was directly descendent from Helga Hufflepuff. She listened as he explained his intention had been to kill her that night in the astronomy tower; he wanted her to pay with her life for refusing someone like him.

She sat there frozen as his voice changed from shear hate to emphatic cruelty as he started to tell everyone what changed his plans since his only other victim had been Hermione who had been injured trying to protect and save Pansy. Her ability to breath went soon after as he said that everything changed because she survived. He knew he had left her in no shape to do so but seeing that she had, _that_ made her worthy of him, his family, his name – most of all worthy to carry his child in spite of her supposed transgressions against him earlier.

Ron's hand gripped her own tightly as those words run through the courtroom while her free hand instinctively went to her stomach. Tears started to burn her eyes as Smith related how he waited until that moment, the first moment she was not within Ron's sight or reach to attack again. He had planned to cast the heir charm and plant his child in her but Ron had interrupted him.

Hearing him recount the final attack caused her tears to actually fall as his words provided further confirmation which she had quickly learned, she did not need. Pansy turned into Ron, holding on to him, as Smith continued his tale of trying to get to her in order for her to carry his child.

She forced herself to sit through the rest of his statement, keeping her face buried in Ron's robes. However, her mind, soul, and heart had decided they had had enough and forced the words to drown in the haze she found herself before she could comprehend their meaning.

When the silence was the only thing she heard, Pansy looked up. She took in all the shocked faces and the red eyes looking at her and Ron. Taking a deep breath she stood up and proceeded to walk out.

She was done.


	92. Critical

******Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter nor do make money.**

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**Critical**

Ron didn't understand why everyone thought Smith's confession was so critical to the case. Pansy's memories, his and even Hermione's should have been enough for the trial - to get a conviction. A Veritaserum-laced confession shouldn't have been need at this stage, because from where he sat, he wasn't sure who Smith's confession hurt more - him or his beloved wife curled up into his body sobbing as that bastard cruelly went over not only his intentions but motivations for all to hear.

And with every word that dribbled out of that bastard's mouth, Ron's temper seethed a little more. His mind constantly plotting devious ways to make Smith pay. To force him to pay the price for not only destroying what little innocence he and his friends had but the even smaller amount he had come to realize that Draco and the other Slytherins had. They had been pawns set up for a sacrificial slaughter their entire life without having a choice or even a say in the matter.

Most of all he hated Smith for truly destroying Pansy. It was moments like these that he wanted to simply kill the monster.

However, the only thing that stopped him was the moments he remembered that Smith wasn't the only one who had had a hand in destroying his wife: her friends and family had done their fair share. Smith may have started the job but they finished it with their abandonment.

Instinctively, he squeezed Pansy who was clinging to his robes tighter. He knew he couldn't take way the pain she was feeling but it didn't make his desire to try to any less. In fact, the reason he agreed to so readily to move away from England at her request was because he saw it as a quick and easy way to shield her further; to maybe protect her a little more and a little better from everyone who either unknowingly, unwittingly or unintentionally hurt her.

She was the only thing that really mattered to him. Well her and the baby but as far as he was concerned they were inseparable.

When silence was the only sound to be had in the courtroom, he felt her sit up. She looked at him, ever so briefly, before looking at everyone he had only realized were staring at them. He watched as she stood up - her back straight, her chin almost defiant - and walked away.

Not a half-second had passed before he also got to his feet. He understood exactly what she was telling all of those who watched - that she was done.

What they hadn't realized, as he got to his own feet, was that he was done too.

He had his family to worry about now.


	93. Walking

******Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter nor do make money.**

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**Walking**

Pansy heard the footsteps behind her as she exited the courtroom but she didn't turn around. She didn't need to. She knew that they belonged to Ron.

Anyone else, she would have turned around immediately and told them to leave her alone - she didn't want their sympathy.

Finding an empty bench, in the corridor outside the courtroom, Pansy sat down and looked towards Ron; she folded her hands primly in her lap with her feet crossed at her ankles. Meeting his eyes, she tried to smile at him but the enormity of their situation, she knew kept it tight and sad.

Watching him approach, she counted every lucky star she could think of that she had him. She doubted that she would have gotten this far without him; without his stubbornness and tenacity that kept him fighting her during those first few weeks after the attack.

When he took the seat next to her, she knew that she had found her forever. Pansy took his hand once he was seated, here eyes focused on his ring as she slowly intertwined their hands.

"Are you okay?" he softly asked, as on of his hands tucked her hair behind her ear.

"Yeah," she responded softly, "Just done."

She thought about saying more but realized there was nothing else she wanted to say.

"I know that feeling," was Ron's response, his voice distant in her ears.

"Are you sure you want to do this?" Pansy asked tentatively, thinking that maybe she had asked to much of him. He had already given her so much; maybe it was time she stopped asking.

"Do what?"

"Leave all this behind."

"Why?" Ron asked, his voice sounding puzzled, before he continued, "Do you not want to anymore?"

"No," she replied, turning to look at him. "I just wanted to know if want to do this?"

"I told you I did."

"But did you say yes because of me or because you want to."

Pansy waited for his response as he took their intertwined hands to his lap. She let him study her fingers and their hands before he quietly said, "I want to do this because you need to do this."

"And if I didn't need this..."

"If you wanted to do this? Then I still would want to do this," he said quietly and carefully. "But I think deep down I really need this too. I've been in the shadows or the limelight all my life and now all I want to do now is to live without either. I just want to live with you and our child."

The tears welled up in Pansy's eyes, as she took in the weight of his words and whispered, "Thank you. So can we leave after the verdict?"

"Definitely."


	94. Drink

******Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter nor do make money.**

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**Drink**

Ron needed a drink.

Telling their friends and family about their plans to join Charlie at the dragon reserve in Romania didn't go well. Hell, 'didn't go well' might have been the understatement of the year. His mother's fussing and tantrum would have been enough to send him to the Leaky for a bottle of their finest Firewhisky but the addition of his brothers, Ginny, Harry and Hermione imploring the twoofo them to stay was about to send him running for Romania and refusing to come back for Christmas.

And they hadn't even told anyone that Pansy was pregnant.

After a good thirty minutes, he finally had had enough of maintaining his patience. He grabbed Pansy's nearby hand and firmly told everyone who was gathered around them, "We appreciate your concern but this is something we need to do. As we already to you, I have a position lined up at the reserve and we should be able to move into our own place by the end of summer. You need to accept the fact that the two of us need to get away from England after everything that has happened. Please just live your own lives and let us live ours. The way we need too."

He thought they had finally heard what he was trying to tell him. However, his success was short-lived. Not a minute later the protests started up again.

Squeezing Pansy's hand, he took a quick look at her and seeing what little fight she had in her disappear, he forced a smile on her face and pulled her with him as he removed them from their well-meaning family and friends.

As they continued down the hallway, he ignored the calls of both of their names. His mind was made up, if words weren't going to work with them, then he sure as hell hoped that their actions would.


	95. Death

******Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter nor do make money.**

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**Death**

Pansy struggled to keep up with Ron's long strides as they moved away from their friends and family. By the set of his face, she knew better than to question him about what just had happened or why he was trying to get away from his friends and family so quickly. She just focused on trying to keep up with him.

They suddenly turned a corner, he pulled her into an open door and closed it quickly.

"Ron, what is it?" she gasped.

"Do you need to hear the verdict?" he responded quickly. "If you do that's fine but do you?"

"No," she replied concerned. The look he gave her was one of disbelief so she continued as firmly as she could mustered while still trying to catch her breath, "I know he's guilty. I don't need to hear a bunch of strangers tell me what I already know."

"Are you absolutely, positively sure?"

Slightly frustrated, Pansy said, "Yes," trying to convey through her voice and tone that she was absolutely, positively sure. "I don't need to hear them say he is guilty and that he is condemned to death."

"Last time, are you -"

"Merlin, Ron. I'm sure," Pansy fussed, her patience now shattered. "_What_ is going on?"

"Would you like to leave for Romania now while everyone is in the courtroom?"

Floored at his suggestion, Pansy's mouth flapped up and down without emitting a sound for several moments. Taking a deep breath, she collected herself, before finally finding her voice to say, in dawning realization, "Yes."

"Thank Merlin," Ron sighed, which caused Pansy to give a quick laugh at the irony of the situation - they were leaving for her but it now appeared Ron was the more eager of the two to go.

"Come on," he said, grabbing her hand. With a quick look to see if the coast was clear, the two of them tore off for the international Floo ports and a one-way ticket to the peace they needed and craved.


	96. Outside

**Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter nor do make money.**

**Outside**

Arriving at Charlie's cottage, Ron and Pansy weren't surprised to find the house dark. They had told him that they probably wouldn't arrive until Sunday long after the verdict came. However, now they were a full five days early but instead of going to track down Charlie, Ron took a seat on the porch and pulled Pansy into his lap Neither one said a word as they sat curled up in comfortable silence.

The sun was going down when Charlie finally appeared saying, "I thought you two weren't coming until Sunday."

"Change of plans," Ron Replied simply as he helped Pansy off his lap.

"Obviously," came Charlie's sarcastic remark.

"Is it a problem?" Pansy asked timidly, taking Ron's hand.

Charlie's face filled with regret as he quickly covered by saying, "No not a problem at all. Just surprised that's all."

"it was a spur of the moment thing," Ron explained as Charlie hugged them both. "We told everyone about our plans and they tried to talk us out of it."

"Did you really expect anything less?"

"No," Pansy admitted. "It just wouldn't been nice if they would have just listened for a moment."

"I can't imagine what they would've done if they knew about..." Ron added but trailed off when he realized what he was about to let slip. Quickly, he tried to cover his almost slip-up with, "We just couldn't take anymore of their well-meaning intentions so it just seemed logical to head on here."

Unfortunately for Ron, Charlie noticed the slip. Opening the front door for them, he asked, "So knew about what? Is everything okay?"

Ron looked at Pansy guiltily but she just smiled and said first to Ron, "It's okay," before turning to Charlie and asking, "How do you feel about being an Uncle Charlie?"

"But I already knew about Fleur," Charlie responded. "Bill couldn't shut up about it..." his voice trailing off when he saw Pansy smirk and Ron struggling to hold in a laugh. "Wait a minute. But I thought...What about...And you haven't told _Mum_! She is going to come here and tan all of our hides for keeping this from her. Thanks a lot you two!"


	97. Always

******Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter nor do make money.**

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**Always**

It didn't take long for the three to fall into a comfortable living arrangement and routine. Ron and Charlie would head off together in the morning for a day's work while Pansy hung around the home tending to anything and everything else until the boys came back home craving a dinner and either a quiet evening at the cottage or a night out at the nearby pub trading the day's horror stories regarding dragons.

Their friends and family still weren't pleased about Ron and Pansy moving to the dragon reserve in Romania – and even less so with Charlie who helped them – but at least the biting comments had dwindled to an occasional remark that stung less. Whereas Charlie and Ron were both grateful that their friend's and family's acceptance of the situation had come so soon, Pansy was surprised that it had come this quickly, especially after they were told exactly why Pansy had been so tired and sick before the trial.

Today had been mostly peaceful, attending to the daily chores, for Pansy. She had even grown brave enough to make an attempt on what Charlie called an office, though Pansy didn't believe any work could actually be done in it amidst the piles of books that littered the floor and every piece of furniture. Not surprising, it didn't take long before she accidentally knocked over one of those precariously stacked books on what appeared to be a filing cabinet. Kneeling down, she started to move them back into a pile so she could return them to their 'proper' place when a picture frame that had also fallen caught her eye.

A sudden onslaught of tears filled her eyes as she reached for the wizard's photo. Behind the fragile protection of glass, was a picture of Charlie and Finny both laughing at the mistletoe that her nine-year-old self hung over them before they kissed. Her hand started to caress her belly, now starting to curve out, as memories of that night flooded back.

The one thing though that replayed over and over again in her mind, as she watched Finny and Charlie kiss again and again, was that was the night she had been let in on their little secret. Not only that, she remembered it was the first time, she could honestly recognize what love between two people was.

Pansy didn't know how long she sat there looking and remembering the love she had witnessed between the two. But she did know that for the first time, she realized the light that had been Finny in Charlie's eyes was completely gone from the Charlie she lived with today.

Hearing the front door open and both her boys loudly proclaim that they were not only home but hungry, she quickly wiped away the evidence of her sadness. Pansy stood up and kissing her fingertips, she pressed them to the image of a smiling and laughing Finny and whispered, "I'll take care of him for you. I promise," before placing the photo back in it's rightful place.


	98. Wrong

******Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter nor do make money.**

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**Wrong**

"Ron," Pansy started timidly as they were getting ready for bed later the same evening in which she found the photo of Finny and Charlie, "is it wrong that I don't think I want us to move into our own place? At least not now."

As she expected, Ron looked up at her surprised more than anything and asked, "Why do you say that?"

"Worried about Charlie I guess," she simply replied, crawling into bed by him.

"Pansy, he's been on his own since he was eighteen. In fact, I think he actually likes it; he was always the loner of all of us kids."

"I don't think he honestly does love. I think he does it so that no one will bug him about not moving on after Finny."

"You think this is about your brother?"

"Uh-huh," she nodded, laying down next to Ron whose hand joined hers over their child. "I found a picture of the two of them today when I was trying to clean that office of his and when I saw that picture, I realized just how different he is today than the Charlie I remember and why he is different."

"And what is that?"

"His eyes Ron. They don't twinkle anymore."

Several long moments passed before Ron responded with a sigh, "Okay, I'll give you that but how does us not moving into our own place fix _that_."

"I'm not saying that it will fix that. I'm just asking to stay closer to him, to take care of him and make sure he takes care of himself."

"Pansy, Charlie has been doing that since we were first years."

"I know, but -"

"And in about four months, we will have our hands full with an infant and I know Charlie is not going to like daily feedings at three in the morning and such."

"I know, but – "

"And I know you care about him and that he is the closest thing you have to a brother anymore but you need to let him take care of himself."

"I know, but-"

"No buts love."

Hoping to hell that Charlie was asleep, or at the very least in his room, Pansy summoned the photo from the office. Once she had it in her hands, she shoved it into Ron's face and said, "_That_is the Charlie I remember. Don't you?"

It took a few minutes before Ron replied with a simple nod.

"Now do you understand?"

"Love..."

"Please Ron."

"Pansy..."

"Ron."

"Why do I suddenly think I'm going to lose this one?"

"You aren't," she whispered. "Please just let us stay here. And if Charlie says something about needing us to move out either one of us, we will do it with no questions asked or comments made."

"Well, can I at least maintain that I don't like this?"

"Noted love. And thank you."


	99. Forgotten

******Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter nor do make money.**

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**Forgotten**

Charlie had carefully planned this moment.

As the days had turned into weeks and the weeks had progressed to months, he kept expecting Ron and Pansy to move out of his place and into a home of their own but they hadn't. In fact, they it hadn't appeared to Charlie that they had any intention to do so.

He hadn't minded really, it was nice having Ron around to make him laugh and Pansy to take care of him and to make sure he took care of himself. Together, they had filled the hole where Finny had been. It just hurt to know that he finally had the life he had wanted with Finny though his bed remained cold and his body ached for the hint of his touch.

Charlie just hated waiting for Ron and Pansy to pull the rug out from under his feet bringing this new, peaceful, and happy life that had found him to an end. Unfortunately, his heart and mind, couldn't take the wait and anticipation any longer.

So he had planned a half-day without telling either one as the baby's arrival drew closer, so that he could talk to Pansy without Ron while still giving them enough time to get settled into their own place if needed before the baby arrived. He felt somewhat guilty for planning to confront Pansy instead of Ron. However, Charlie figured that Pansy would be honest with him while Ron would only tell him what he wanted to hear.

Walking up to the cottage, he was surprised to find Pansy outside stretched out in a chaise with sugar curled up sleeping on what was left of her lap and her face buried into a book that was half-way balanced on her belly while her free hand rubbed it in a soothing manner.

The creaky first step to the porch caused her to look up and quickly say, "Are you hurt?"

"No, I'm not."

"Ron's not hurt is he?"

"No he's not hurt either."

Pansy looked at him puzzled and said, 'Then why are you home early?"

"I just wanted to talk to you," he mumbled more than said, as he took a seat next to her legs on the chaise before adding, "Without Ron."

"Why?"

"Figured you wouldn't lie to me."

"Ron wouldn't lie to you."

He hated when she was right. Correcting himself, he said, "Okay...how about I wanted your version of the truth."

"_What _is going on Charlie?"

"When are you two moving out?" His question more abrupt, his tone much sharper than he intended but his desperation of having an answer whether he liked it or not overcame any sense of decorum or politeness he had.

While he sat waiting for her to say the words that would bring his world tumbling down, he didn't realize that Pansy hadn't given an answer immediately. Instead, she had waited for several moments before calmly asking, "Do you need us out of your hair?"

Charlie started to respond but stopped when he realized exactly what she had said. Quickly, trying to recover, he stuttered, "No, it's just..."

"I understand," she softly said, grabbing his hand. "Ron knew this would come up and don't worry, we will get out of your hair soon."

"What do you mean...you've talked...I mean, what...I mean...okay, I'm confused."

"What's there to be confused about," she asked, looking at him like he was crazy. "You want us to move out and Ron said you would eventually, I just kind of hope you would forget and we could just stay here with you."

"What?...Why?" Charlie wasn't exactly sure if he completely knew for himself which way was up at this exact moment.

Pansy looked at him equally as confused before shaking her head and saying, "Okay, let's start from the beginning. Why did you want to talk to me?"

"Because I wanted to know when you two were going to move out," Charlie replied honestly, before continuing softly, "I'm tired of waiting for you to drop the bomb on me."

"Charlie...do you want us to stay? If you do, just say the word."

Charlie whipped his head around to look at her. Looking over her carefully, trying to determine if she was not only telling the truth but meant it.

He must have been taking too long for her because she pulled Sugar from her lap and scooted as close to him as her swollen stomach would allow and softly said, "I asked Ron if we could stay a couple of months ago after finding a picture of you and Finny. The one in your office. The one of you kissing under the mistletoe I held above your heads. Well, he agreed to stay here with you only if you were okay with it. I just never had the guts to ask you outright and instead relied on you forgetting...

His heart didn't want to believe what his ears were hearing. It was too good to be true. So instead, he asked, "Why would you want to stay?"

"Because there are times that Ron and I see the Charlie of our childhoods – the one who loved my brother."

"But what about wanting your own place?"

"In all honesty, I would rather be responsible for one household than two," Pansy gently teased him. Charlie appreciated her attempt at levity at a time like this. "However, if you want us to stay, we will because we want to but if you need us to go, we will do that for you too."

"Why are you doing this for me?"

"Charlie, you may not want a new beginning but that doesn't mean Ron and I are going to let you muddle through this life by running away from one."

"Thank you," he whispered, wrapping his arms around her and burying his face into her hair and neck. "Thank you."

"No problem," she whispered. "But how about you tell us that after dealing with an infant waking you up at three in the morning day in and day out."


	100. How?

******Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter nor do make money.**

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**How?**

Pansy couldn't count the number of times she had mentally prepared herself for _this_ moment. She had thought she had it all planned out until the time actually arrived – when her oldest child would ask that question that every young girl asks her mum.

The only thing she hadn't expected was the question to come at some random lunch hour without Ron or Charlie their for support.

Taking a deep breath, she took a seat across from May and little Finny, who thankfully was more interested in his lunch than his older sister or mum. As calmly as possible, Pansy asked, "And what do you want to know pumpkin?"

"I just want to know how you and Daddy fell in love," May's light voice sung like caroling bells at Christmas as she repeated her question.

Forcing a soft smile on her face, in response to the flood of terrible memories that flooded her mind, Pansy started, "Well your Daddy saved me from an evil monster at the top of a tower..."

_Fin._


End file.
